


The Things We Sacrifice

by CanineKitten



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Infidelity, M/M, Post-Boruto: Naruto the Movie, Post-Canon, Romance, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-21
Updated: 2017-08-31
Packaged: 2018-10-22 05:50:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 45,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10691046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CanineKitten/pseuds/CanineKitten
Summary: "It couldn’t be healthy. It wasn’t healthy. Not for either of them. But it was easy and safe and it was what they were used to. So that’s how they continued."





	1. Memories From The Past

**Author's Note:**

> So I've finally gotten around to writing a post-canon fic! I'm so excited about this story ^^ I'm sort of posting it in a rush so I might go back and edit it later. Please tell me if you find any glaring mistakes!

 

 

The night air was fresh and clear and smelled of rain. Naruto breathed in the scent of Konoha. It wasn’t as satisfying as it used to be.

”Are things okay with you and Sakura?”

Sasuke was sitting next to him, his presence like a soothing balm on Naruto’s soul. He had been in Konoha for a while now, much longer than Naruto could recall that he had been since the first time he left.

”Yes. Why do you ask?”

”I didn’t get to ask you before, but with everything that happened with Sarada and all… I thought maybe something was going on.”

It had been a while since the incident with the clones, but Naruto hadn’t seen Sasuke since then. He had been worrying about his friends for a long while, but he knew that if he asked Sakura she’d get mad.

”No, we’re fine.”

”So… she’s okay with you being away all the time?

”She accepts is. She knows why I’m doing it. I think Sarada understands it too now.”

”I’m not talking about accepting it… Sasuke… Do you really love her?”

“Yes, of course,” Sasuke said a bit tersely. Then he added in a milder tone, “I do. I’ve always cared for her, and… I do love her…”

”Then why do you spend so little time with her? We both know that the mission wasn’t that important. She knows that too.”

Sasuke got quiet.

”I just thought that you needed to be honest with yourself. I can see that Sakura is hurting, even though she puts on a brave front.”

”What about you?” Sasuke said. ”You don’t really have any right to tell me to spend more time with my family. When was the last time you took a day off to spend time with your kids?”

Naruto recoiled. ”I guess I deserved that,” he admitted. ”You’re right… I’m not one to speak. The truth is…” He stared down at his feet dangling fifty feet above the ground from the rooftop they were sitting at. “I’m not in love with Hinata anymore.”

The quiet night air was getting chillier. He could sense Sasuke staring at him.

“I…” Naruto continued. “I don’t know when it happened. I started working more. Started seeing her less. And then I started realizing that I didn’t long to be with her anymore. It is true that work can be tough at times, but sometimes I push myself further just to avoid going home. It’s affecting the kids, I can see that… but it feels like I’m stuck in a pit and all I can do is keep digging.”

They were quiet for a while.

“Still… I can’t see myself leaving her,” Naruto whispered.

“Why not?”

Naruto shrugged. “It would be even tougher on the kids. And on her. She’s… fragile, in a way. She relies a lot on me. I don’t have the heart to do that to her.”

“You’re not giving her much credit.”

“Maybe not… I don’t know… I don’t really know her that well despite having lived with her for so long. We had the kids early, and… I guess we never got the time to really get to know each other.”

“Why did you even marry her in the first place?”

Naruto scratched the back of his head. “I’ve thought a lot about that… It seemed like the right thing to do back then. She was nice and sweet and… I guess I felt I owed it to her or something… since she’d always believed in me and she never gave up on me…” He stared at a small hole in his pants. He hadn’t noticed it before and suddenly he found it very interesting. “I felt a bit pressured, too,” he added. “Everyone seemed to expect me to find a girlfriend and since I liked her a bit I thought it was a good choice.”

Sasuke might not say much, but his presence spoke for him. He was not only listening to Naruto, he was also sitting very close. There were barely a few inches separating them. It told Naruto that Sasuke was comfortable, that he enjoyed being there. And that was all Naruto could ask for.

“There’s also my position as hokage,” Naruto said. “It would become a huge scandal if I were to leave Hinata. I don’t care much about the media and all that, but I think she would find it troubling. She’s already uncomfortable with the few interviews she’s had to do and that she always has to look presentable and collected. It’s been a bit of a strain for her as well.”

“It sounds to me like the two of you would be better off apart.”

Naruto leaned back on his hands. His right hand ended up right behind Sasuke’s back. Naruto watched him unabashedly for a few moments. Sasuke was leaning a bit forward, his hand resting on his knee, looking out over the city that was illuminated in yellow, orange and red from the streetlights and lanterns and the soft light from the many homes.

Naruto lowered his gaze after a while, constantly conscious of the danger of being caught staring.

Sasuke stood. “I need to get going.”

Naruto stood too and dusted off.

They faced each other for a second, both hesitating. Naruto wanted to give Sasuke a hug, but he didn’t think Sasuke would appreciate it. He wasn’t the hugging type. Sasuke’s gaze changed to something a bit softer, a bit warmer, for a short second before he turned and left.

 

\-------

 

Sasuke thought about what Naruto had said. Somehow, the words ‘do you really love her?’ kept circling around in his head. He had asked himself that question many times. He knew for a fact that he _did_ love her.

But did he long for her when he was away? Did he think of her every waking moment, longing to be home so that he could finally be with her?

The honest answer was no.

He knew he should have loved her more. That he should have given her more of himself. But he couldn’t, because that part of him was reserved for someone else. Someone he could never have.

All he had left to give Sakura was scraps, but as long as she would accept it that would have to do.

 

\-------

 

It was strange to be home. He felt awkward about talking with Sarada since he didn’t feel like he knew her, but at the same time he enjoyed spending more time with her. The relationship between him and Sakura was also a little strained. Each time they met it felt to him like he had to get to know her anew. And it wasn’t easy because she always put on a front around him.

She’d never seemed to hold a grudge against him like many others did, but sometimes he wondered if there was some part of her that had been deeply wounded by all the things that had happened between them in the past. She always put up a shield when she was with him and he had no idea what went on behind it. On one hand he wished she would open up to him properly, but on the other hand he knew that there was things he was keeping from her too, so they just continued on living on the surface, never brushing the deeper thoughts and feelings.

Unlike Naruto.

The conversation last night had really gotten Sasuke thinking. He wondered if he was hurting Sakura more than he knew by being so distant. She said that she supported him, but he too could sense that she wasn’t entirely happy.

There was also the issue of… intimacy. There were things that she wanted, and that she subtly hinted at, that he just couldn’t give her. He’d tried, but… It never felt entirely right. He felt he was denying her something vital and he knew that it was helping widening the chasm between them.

That’s why when Sakura told him Sarada would be at a sleepover that night, he decided he’d indulge her. She was delighted when he started kissing her after they had gone to bed that night. She always slept in sheer satin-nightgowns that hugged her hips and breasts, but to Sasuke those garments always felt a little too flimsy. He tried to be careful when he pulled it over her head. She wriggled out of it and placed her arms around his neck. She sighed when he kissed the column of her neck. He tried to ignore the strong flowery scent of her perfume. Up close it was almost cloying.

He slipped in between her legs and rocked gently against her. She curled around him with a soft groan. Her hands caressed his cheeks. He knew she wanted him to look at her, but he couldn’t. He pressed his face against her chest. He couldn’t…

She felt it too… That he wasn’t hard. She lay there quietly. The only sound in the room was from her breath slowly calming down. He rolled off her and then they turned their back on each other, pretending like nothing had happened.

The next morning Sasuke woke up alone. In the kitchen he found a note next to his lunch.

‘I’m visiting Ino, will be back by dinnertime. Love you. Sakura.’

Once again he felt like he ruined her life just by being in it, and she just brushed the scraps under the carpet and pretended like nothing.

He really felt like seeing Naruto.

 

\-------

 

“Sakura made me lunch, but she always makes too much. I thought we could share it.”

Naruto’s face lit up in a smile.

“You thought about me?” he asked with a teasing grin. “That’s so sweet of you.”

“Unless you have your own lunch?”

Naruto’s grin fell. “No,” he said. “Actually, your timing is perfect. I’ve been delaying going out and buying something for too long.”

They went to sit on the huge stone head in Naruto’s likeness at the Hokage Mountain. For a while they ate in companionable silence.

Naruto finished his part of the meal fast and then he tried to steal from Sasuke. Sasuke knocked away his chopsticks. “That one’s mine.”

Naruto pouted. “You eat so slowly. It’ll go bad before you’re done.”

Naruto lay down and looked up at the sky. “Do you ever wonder what life would be like if you hadn’t gotten married?”

“Bleak.”

Naruto glanced over at Sasuke. “You don’t know that.”

“At least I have something to return to. If I didn’t have them…” he trailed off.

“You have me,” Naruto said and grinned.

Sasuke looked at him with a small, amused smile. “You have your own family.”

“Yeah, but if I didn’t? Then we could hang out all the time.”

“Great. So I have you until you find someone to settle down with. And then what?”

“Well, you could always settle down with me.” Naruto wriggled his brows, but inside his stomach was fluttering nervously. He was really flirting with destiny here.

Sasuke stilled.

For a second he looked like he took Naruto seriously.

“I was just joking,” Naruto said with a nervous laugh.

 

\-------

 

There was a knock on the door. Sasuke opened. Outside stood Naruto and Boruto. 

“Hi!" Naruto said with a wide grin. "Do you guys want to come with on a fishing trip?”

Sarada came running to the door. Her eyes nearly sparkled when she caught sight of Naruto. “Seventh!” Then she glared at Boruto who glared back.

Sasuke looked at Sarada. “What do you say?”

“Yes!”

 

\--------

 

Sasuke had stretched out in the grass while Sarada and Boruto were skipping stones by the river. Naruto went over to him and sat down next to him. He watched his peaceful face. He seemed to be asleep, but Naruto knew better than that. He leant on his elbow, facing Sasuke.

“They seem to get along well.”

“They fight all the time,” Sasuke said without opening his eyes.

Naruto chuckled. “So did we and look at us now.”

He continued watching their children. He noticed how Sarada blushed slightly around Boruto, and how she seemed to suddenly become a bit shy before she snapped back to being annoyed at him. He’d noticed that Boruto seemed to be more eager to show off around her too.

“I think they’d make a cute couple,” Naruto mused.

“What?” Sasuke was suddenly wide-awake. “My daughter and that brat of yours?”

“Hey!”

Sasuke sat up and looked over at the kids. They were fighting over something. Suddenly, Boruto splashed water at Sarada. She stilled but even from a distance they could see that she was fuming.

“Uh, oh…” Naruto said.

Boruto seemed to realize he should be running, so he did, with Sarada hot on his heels wielding a bucket.

Naruto chuckled. “They remind me a lot of us when we were kids.”

It took him a moment to realize Sasuke was giving him a look.

“What?”

Sasuke shook his head. “Nothing.”

They lay next to each other in silence for a moment, watching their kids roll around in the grass, kicking and yelling.

Naruto watched Sasuke’s face while he wasn't paying attention to him. In the light of the setting sun Sasuke’s profile reminded Naruto of a time long past… Of a valley ruined by a fight between two young boys who had mover power than wits. Of a feeling of pure happiness at the sight of Sasuke’s smile and the lone tear that trailed down his cheek.

Naruto had to take a deep breath to calm the emotions that started to come to the surface, just as strong now as they had been over fifteen years ago.

He startled when Sasuke turned to look at him. Sasuke noticed Naruto’s inner turmoil immediately, even though Naruto tried to hide it, but he said nothing. It was their way of coping, sadly enough. It had become a habit not to ask, not to prod… Because they both knew that what hid underneath the surface was too wild to be tamed.

Sasuke sat up and dusted grass and leaves off his clothes.

“It’s getting late,” he said. “Sakura expects us home for dinner.”

“Oh… Yeah…” Naruto’s heart sank a bit.

Home…

They collected their things and told the kids they were leaving. Naruto walked as slowly as was humanly possible. Sasuke matched his pace without asking questions. The forest was beautiful at this time of year. Lush and green, and the underbrush hiding little gems like a meadow of yellow little flowers, or bushes of ripe, red berries.

There, in the semi-darkness of the forest, with only little rays of sunlight slipping in here and there and with their kids somewhere far ahead of them, Naruto suddenly felt extra brave.

“Sasuke,” he said and stopped.

Sasuke stopped too, and turned to him. He looked relaxed and content, and he had that warm look on his face again.

Naruto swallowed around the lump in his throat.

“I…”

They looked at each other and for a second it felt like Sasuke could see straight into his heart. He waited patiently. Naruto’s mouth felt so dry he could barely get the words out. He took a step closer.

“Sasuke… “ He cleared his throat. “There’s something I need to tell you… I’ve been thinking a lot about it and I think I made a mistake. I… It doesn’t matter if you feel the same or not but I… ah… I just need you to know that I love you… and not platonically. I – I’m in love with you.”

Naruto could feel his entire face grow hotter and redder for each word. He couldn’t look at Sasuke. He was astonished at himself for speaking those words after so many years of keeping quiet.

The silence of the forest settled down around them. Suddenly the soft dripping of dew falling from leaves and the gentle rush of a breeze rustling the branches was overwhelmingly loud and clear.

“How long have you been carrying this?” Sasuke asked.

His voice was soft and raw. When Naruto dared look at him, he found that his eyes were slightly moist. He closed them before Naruto could see too much.

“… For a long time.”

“But you didn’t say anything back when…”

Naruto knew what Sasuke wanted to say. Back before they settled down and had a family. “Everything was in turmoil back then… I didn’t know exactly how I felt about you. I was still a bit uncertain about who we were for each other.”

His voice grew soft. It barely carried over the breeze. “And then we parted ways and… life happened…”

Suddenly Sasuke embraced him. He squeezed Naruto tight and pressed his cheek to the side of Naruto’s head.

“I love you too,” he whispered.

Naruto closed his eyes and breathed in Sasuke’s scent. He held him tightly and felt an empty despair in the pit of his stomach at the knowledge that he could have had this. If only…

He held Sasuke even harder and buried his nose in the crook of his neck.

He felt Sasuke turn his head and did the same, and then Sasuke’s nose was pressed against his cheek and his hair was tickling the side of his face, and his lips were slotted firmly over Naruto’s.

Naruto shivered from the back of his neck down to his toes. Sasuke kissed him again and again, each kiss growing more desperate, his arm holding Naruto tighter, more firmly in place, practically drinking him in. Naruto opened his mouth without even noticing and returned the kisses with just as much desperation as Sasuke.

In the back of his mind he knew they couldn’t do this for long. Someone could see them. Their _kids_ could see them. But in that moment it was unthinkable to stop. He held Sasuke’s waist tightly, his thumbs sneaking up under the hem of his shirt to caress his skin.

Sasuke drew in a desperate breath. His thumb caressed Naruto’s cheek, then the corner of his lips.

He placed a few close-mouthed kisses on Naruto’s parted lips before he finally drew away. Naruto looked at him through a film of tears. Though his eyes were moist he didn’t feel like crying. Sasuke looked so incredibly gentle and sad when he looked at Naruto. His thumb was still caressing his cheek. They were still standing so close that they could feel each other’s heartbeat.

Naruto leant closer till their foreheads met. They said nothing more. There was nothing more to say. They went home in silence.

 

\-------

 

It was strange, but everything felt exactly the same when Sasuke got back home. It was like the kiss had never happened. He made small talk with Sakura, and listened to Sarada talking with enthusiasm about their trip with the hokage. He caught his thoughts drifting towards the kiss now and then. The whole incident felt almost surreal, like a dream. Just like many of the other dreams he’d had about kissing Naruto. But now he also had the memory of the feel of Naruto’s mouth against his, of the warmth of his body and the strength of his arms entwined around his neck. Of the scent of him up close…

“Sasuke?”

Sasuke startled back to reality at Sakura’s voice. She looked at him curiously. “Do you want more rice?”

“… Yes. Thank you.”

 

\-------

 

He had sex with Sakura that night. Sarada was home, but it was late at night and her room was at the other end of the hall. He didn’t know what came over him, but he needed the intimacy right then. Sakura didn’t protest about the spontaneity, although she threw a few concerned looks towards the door. They were quiet, like they always were. He finished far too soon, but he could tell that she was satisfied. She smiled and held his face and kissed him tenderly before he fell asleep.

 

\-------

 

He didn’t talk to Naruto for a few days after that. He just couldn’t bring himself to face him. What should they do about it anyway? They were both married. So when they met again, things were a bit awkward. Naruto blushed and avoided looking directly at Sasuke. They were with their wives at a festival that Sakura had to fight long to convince him to come to. They were meeting up with their friends. The kids were off somewhere buying dango and god knew what other kinds of sweet stuff with the money they’d gotten for the occasion.

The women were wearing kimonos. Sakura looked very sweet in her pink and white kimono adorned with sakura flowers, but Sasuke only had eyes for Naruto. He was dressed up too, and it was unusual to see him so… incredibly good looking. Sasuke continuously had to pry his eyes away from him.

They didn’t talk much at first. Naruto was busy chatting with everyone else. It wasn’t often he had time off to see his friends. Sasuke just got more and more miserable as the night proceeded. It had been hours and Naruto still hadn’t talked to him.

He was sitting by a table together with Sakura, Ino, Sai, Chouji and Karui. He didn’t say much and as he drank more and more sake, he got more and more quiet. Sakura tried to pull him into the conversation, but soon she gave up. Chouji tried for some small talk, and Sai seemed unabashed about asking Sasuke almost anything.

At one point Sarada came in.

“What are you doing here?” Sasuke said. He pulled her closer and kissed her forehead. She looked baffled and pleased.

“I just wanted to tell you that I’m going home now. Together with Cho Cho.”

Sasuke looked across the room to where Boruto was talking to Hinata. He didn’t see Cho Cho anywhere.

“You’re not going with Boruto, are you?”

He got an elbow in the side from Sakura. “You can walk home with whomever you want, darling,” she said. “And Boruto is a good kid.”

Sarada ran off and Sasuke turned to Sakura.

“He’s a boy.”

She chuckled. “I know that.”

“I don’t want my daughter walking home alone with a boy.”

Sakura rolled her eyes. “She knows him. And so do you. You don’t really think he’s gonna do anything inappropriate?”

Sasuke sent a look in Naruto’s direction. He was starting to get a bit drunk and was being even louder than normal.

“Knowing where he came from…”

Sakura gave his arm a playful slap. “Come on, give him some credit.”

She turned back to her conversation with Ino and Karui, and Sasuke realized that Chouji and Sai had left the table, and that Hinata and Temari had taken their places. He finally swallowed his pride and went over to Naruto and the other men. When Naruto saw him approaching he stood and bellowed, “Sasuke!”

Then he grabbed Sasuke and gave him a big hug. Sasuke froze completely. He heard the other guys guffaw.

“Let the poor man breathe,” he heard Kiba say. “He always gets very hands-on when he’s drunk,” he explained when Sasuke had sat down.

“Talk for yourself, Kiba,” Naruto slurred. “You hugged everyone you met the last time we were out.”

The other guys fell into an easy conversation, and Sasuke found that it wasn’t so difficult to join in. Naruto was sitting almost uncomfortably close with his whole thigh touching Sasuke’s thigh, but it was so crowded around the table that Sasuke couldn’t move away. And then, in the middle of conversation, Naruto suddenly placed his hand on Sasuke’s knee under the table. Sasuke tensed, worried that someone would notice, but no one did. Naruto’s hand stayed on his knee, only squeezing and petting it occasionally. Sasuke felt desire bloom hot in his belly. He found it difficult to control it in his inebriated state, especially after having dreamed of Naruto touching him for so long. He had to excuse himself and went out to get some fresh air.

Naruto followed him shortly after. There was no one else outside at that moment, and the second they were both out of sight from the door, Naruto pressed Sasuke up against the wall and kissed him with a fierce hunger. Sasuke was too overwhelmed to protest at first. He let himself be pinned against the wall and greedily accepted Naruto’s mouth. But his sanity came back to him far too soon. If anyone walked out that door, they’d be busted. He turned away from the kiss, but Naruto just continued down his neck, sucking harshly on his skin. Sasuke moaned in surprised pleasure. He felt Naruto’s erection press against his hip and had to bite his lip in order not to give in to the desire.

He pushed Naruto away.

“Are you out of your mind?” he hissed.

“Maybe,” Naruto panted. His pupils were almost consuming his irises.

“We can’t,” Sasuke said as firmly as he could.

Naruto leant in and kissed Sasuke’s jaw. “It’ll be quick. We can go to my place.”

“…People will wonder where we are.”

“It doesn’t matter.” Naruto’s kisses trailed up Sasuke’s cheek, to his cheekbone.

Sasuke pushed Naruto away again. “We can’t do this,” he said with finality. “You’ll regret it tomorrow.”

Naruto looked sad. “I – ”

“You’re drunk. If you want to kiss me again… Do it when you’re sober.”

And then he slipped back into the restaurant.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. We Suffer In Silence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter focuses more on Naruto. There's some graphic NaruHina, but I put it under this symbol: --NH-- so that you can skip it if you want to. It's not a long scene. It shows a bit of Naruto and Hinata's interaction, though, so if you're not too troubled by it I recommend that you read it.
> 
> Btw, are you guys troubled by the sexual scene between Sakura and Sasuke? Should I have warned about it? I'm not sure what you guys think about these kind of things so please let me know. Anyway, it won't be more het sex in this story. I only added them to show how dysfunctional these relationships are.

 

Hinata’s grin lit up her whole face.

“Naruto, you’re home early!”

He kissed her cheek. 

“You’ll never guess what happened today,” she said with girlish enthusiasm.

Naruto had to grin too. “What?”

“Guess!”

“But you said I’d never guess.”

She giggled. “Oh, yes.” She grabbed his hand as soon as he’d taken off his shoes, and led him towards the living room. “Look!”

“Ah…” Naruto scanned the room, trying to find something that was different. “Uh…”

Hinata’s smile fell. “You don’t see the difference, do you?”

Naruto felt his shoulders slump. “I’m sorry.”

Hinata hurried to smile again. “It’s okay. See,” she pointed at the curtains. “I got the new curtains!”

“Ah! They’re pretty.” He desperately tried to remember how the old curtains had looked, but he couldn’t seem to recall. These were a deep lilac, a few shades darker than her eyes. He smiled as he watched her hold them up to her face and giggle.

He really wished he could love her.

 

\------

 

The worst part about living with someone you had no desire for anymore, was that it was impossible to find some… private time without running the risk of her walking in on him. He often jerked off in the shower because despite the fact that Hinata could walk into the bathroom anytime, since Naruto never locked the door, she never did. She still had some strange shyness about nakedness, even though they were married.

That was one of the many things that had been a turn-off for Naruto. He longed for a partner who desired him. Who honestly wanted and needed him, and who would initiate something with him. With Hinata it was always him that had to do the initiation. He didn’t have count on how long it had been since they last had sex. He wondered if Hinata missed it, though he couldn’t tell if she did. She always went to bed dressed in nightclothes, and she never tried to hint about anything. So Naruto let it be. It was better that way anyway.

The make-out session with Sasuke the other night had left him with a lot of unresolved sexual tension, as well as a lot of guilt. He could barely look at Hinata. He longed to give himself some long sought after attention, but it wasn’t tempting to hide away in the shower for a few minutes of guilt-ridden pleasure.

He watched Hinata as she readied for bed. She was brushing her hair. Naruto watched her dark hair that barely brushed her shoulders and suddenly he got an idea.

“Have you ever thought about cutting your hair short?” He asked her.

She turned. “Um… Not really. Would you like that?”

“I think it would look good on you.”

She fingered her long locks with a thoughtful look on her face.

“You used to have short hair when you were younger,” Naruto suddenly remembered. “It was very nice.”

“You think so?”

“Yes!”

She looked at herself in the mirror. “Okay,” she said. “It’ll be nice to try something new.”

 

\-------

 

Naruto was a bit surprised to see his wife greet him a few days later with her hair cut in a short bob. She was grinning shyly, twisting her short locks between her fingers.

“Do you like it?” She said and took a small twirl.

“I love it,” Naruto said.

He pulled her close and kissed the top of her head.

 

\--NH--

 

That night he couldn’t wait to get her into bed. He read two nighttime stories for Himawari to make sure she was fast asleep, and checked in on Boruto to reprimand him for playing games.

“Do you think I can’t see the light under your duvet?”

Boruto grumbled something and placed his Gameboy on the nightstand. Naruto grabbed it and put it on the desk across the room.

“Go to sleep, now.”

He waited fifteen minutes before checking on him again, but by then he was fast asleep. Satisfied, Naruto went into his and Hinata’s room where Hinata was already sitting on her side of the bed, reading a book. He took a shower and crept into bed wearing only his boxers. Hinata noticed. She was blushing though she pretended to still be engulfed in her book. Naruto kissed her shoulder.

“The kids are asleep,” he said.

Hinata was steadily turning more and more red. It had amused Naruto in the beginning. He thought she was cute when she was being so shy. But after a while, when they were supposed to know each other better and trust each other more, it became a barrier. He ignored it now and took the book from her hands.

“It’s been a while,” he said.

He kissed her clavicles and she sighed. Naruto urged her to take off her nightdress, but she wanted to turn off the lights first.

“Leave the night light on,” Naruto said. “I want to see you.”

She blushed but conceded. Naruto urged her to turn around. Seeing her short, dark hair contrasting her pale skin, she looked remarkably much like Sasuke. Naruto ran a hand through her short hair. He closed his eyes and kissed the back of her shoulders. He was already getting exceptionally hard. He slipped one hand between her legs. She was completely wet. He wasted no time entering her. It had been a while so he was careful at first. She fisted the sheet and buried her face in the pillow with a soft whimper. Naruto set a gentle pace in order to ease her into it. He couldn’t help but wonder how Sasuke would feel… He grunted and thrust a little harder. She moaned softly so he knew she was okay. She had sometimes complained that he was too rough, so he always tried to be as gentle as he could.

He leant over her and carded his fingers through her hair. He nuzzled her neck and was pulled out of the fantasy when he felt the sweet, peachy scent of her skin. He turned his head so that his nose wasn’t against her skin, and focused on her slick, warm heat encompassing him.

“Naruto,” she whispered. “I want to turn around…”

He groaned softly. “Okay…”

He pulled out and sat back, and she turned around. She blushed when her gaze landed on his erection.

“C-can we turn the lights off?” She muttered.

Naruto sighed. “Okay.” He could already feel his erection wilt.

 

\--NH--

 

He had never before considered that he might have married Hinata because she reminded him of Sasuke, but the evidence was mindboggling when he opened his eyes to see them. Although she didn’t resemble him much personality-wise, their looks had astoundingly many similarities. Pale skin, dark hair, powerful eyes... When she was younger she even had a hairstyle that resembled Sasuke’s. Naruto remembered the first time he met Hinata and immediately thought she was a boy. He’d called her ‘him’ for the better part of a month before someone finally corrected him.

Looking at his lovely wife now, he realized that she had only been a means to fill an empty space inside him that was left there by Sasuke. He had been inconsolable after Sasuke left again after the war. He’d been looking forward to finally having Sasuke beside him once again after everything had settled down, but then he just… left.

By then it shouldn’t have hurt so much anymore, but instead it just hurt more. His friends tried to make him go out and do something. They had no idea what had befallen him, but they tried their best to console him. And then Sakura had come with the brilliant idea of finding him a girlfriend.

It was done with the best intentions, but the long-term results were not pretty. It was his own fault in the end, though. He could have said no, but at the time it had seemed like a good option. He wished he could go back in time to his younger self, hit him over the head and send him packing after Sasuke.

But that was all in the past. The only thing he could do now, was look forward and hope that a brighter future lay ahead of him.

 

\-------

 

It was a week after the festival when Sasuke found a note with his name on it tucked under the door.

It must have been left there after Sarada and Sakura had left, or else they would have picked it up.

All it said was ‘Meet me at the south gate at three o’clock’.

It was Naruto’s writing. What was he planning?

 

\------

 

“Your attempt at stealth is pathetic,” Sasuke said the second Naruto appeared. “What if Sakura had found it? She would have recognized your handwriting.”

Naruto pouted. “I waited until she left.”

“It would have been wiser to just write your name on it. That way if she found it before me it wouldn’t have seemed so suspicious.”

“But it worked, didn’t it? And what’s suspicious about this? Just two dudes hanging out…” Naruto bumped Sasuke’s shoulder with his fist. “Doing dude things.”

Sasuke just gave him the most unimpressed look in his repertoire.

“… Don’t do that again.”

“What, this?” Naruto bumped his shoulder again.

Sasuke turned with a grumble and headed for the gate. “Where are we going?”

“Just wait and see.”

They ran for about an hour until they reached a small thick of threes near a river. Naruto led them through the underbrush out onto a grass-covered bank overlooking the river, which glittered lazily in the sunlight.

“I thought we could do some fishing and grill it here on the bank.”

“This place is nice,” Sasuke said.

It was really secluded and not easy to find unless you knew about it.

They caught a few fish and after eating they just sprawled out in the grass. Sasuke felt the kind of complete peace that he only ever felt in Naruto’s company.

“You know that time when we went fishing together with the kids?” Naruto said. He was lying very close to Sasuke. “I wanted to do this when you were lying in the grass.”

Naruto leant down and brushed his lips against Sasuke’s. The kiss was far too short. Sasuke opened his eyes. He hadn’t even noticed that he’d closed them. Naruto lingered over him.

“You said I could kiss you when I was sober,” Naruto said.

“You remembered…”

Naruto smiled. He placed one hand on Sasuke’s chest. They watched each other in silence. Naruto’s eyes were filled with raw emotion. Sasuke could see desire and sorrow in them, much like the feelings he himself carried around Naruto. That, as well as a deep, bottomless love. Sasuke closed his eyes to hide the sudden onslaught of emotions from being mirrored on his face.

He didn’t get any forewarning when Naruto swooped down and brushed their lips together again. He’d never imagined Naruto could be so soft and gentle… at least not with him. This time Naruto’s lips lingered. Sasuke kissed him back, and felt Naruto sigh. He settled more comfortably over him, their chests touching.

They kissed for a long time. Just lazy, gentle kisses. The desire to touch and hold and explore Naruto’s body was surging right under Sasuke’s skin, but he held back. The guilt was gnawing at him, more now than ever before, but he also felt happy and it wasn’t often that happened to him.

He had a feeling Naruto felt the same way, because despite the fact that Sasuke could feel his erection against the side of his hip, Naruto didn’t push further. Sasuke had to admit that was quite a feat for the normally so impulsive ninja, because he was literally rock hard. Sasuke brushed the bulge with the tips of his fingers, and Naruto shuddered.

He pulled away from Sasuke and laid down right next to him, his hand still on Sasuke’s chest. They were both a little out of breath.

“What are we doing?” Naruto whispered.

Sasuke had no answer to that.

 

\-------

 

When Sasuke entered Naruto’s office a few days later, quiet as a shadow but his presence like a beacon to Naruto, Naruto felt his insides go molten with desire in an instant. He remained seated behind his desk in an attempt to regain some of his authority.

Sasuke stood in the middle of the room without saying anything. Naruto let his gaze roam slowly over Sasuke’s body, from his broad shoulders to his strong thighs. He blinked in an attempt to hide the desire in his eyes and shuffled some documents.

“How is Sakura doing?”

He didn’t know why he asked that. He swallowed. His mouth felt dry.

Sasuke walked closer until he was standing right in front of Naruto’s desk.

“She’s fine. In fact, she asked me to bring you this.”

He placed a pink box with a white lily pattern and a pink bow on Naruto’s desk.

“She thinks you’re working too much.”

He leant on the edge of Naruto’s desk.

“Ironically, she also thinks I should be seeing you more often. She accuses me of being a recluse.”

The box smelled of cookies. Naruto placed it to the side of the desk.

He looked up at Sasuke who was watching him quietly, his dark eyes seemingly even darker than normal, a deep, smoldering desire burning under the surface. Naruto suddenly forgot what to say, even what to think. He stared at Sasuke and knew that the same raw desire must be evident in his eyes too.

It seemed like they both moved as if on cue. Sasuke surged in to meet Naruto’s lips at the same time as Naruto rose from his seat and leant over to grab Sasuke and capture his mouth. Some of the documents around them fluttered to the floor, but Naruto couldn’t care less. He pushed aside a heavy book so that it hit the floor with a loud thud, and dragged Sasuke across the desk. Sasuke made a choked sound at being manhandled, but to Naruto’s surprise, he also seemed to like it. His thighs closed around Naruto’s hips and his mouth opened eagerly for Naruto’s tongue.

In that moment, Naruto stopped giving a fuck about anything. His reputation, his wife, his family… Everything was just closed out by desire. His hands roved hungrily over Sasuke’s body, unable to decide what parts to explore first. He pulled Sasuke closer and reveled in the groan he got from him. Their lips were nearly bruising from the force of their kiss, but when he tried to pull back Sasuke grabbed his hair and forced them together again.

Naruto groaned into Sasuke’s mouth. He fumbled with the hem of Sasuke’ shirt and pulled it up to reveal his stomach. It was smooth and firm to the touch, a result of long, strenuous travels and little idleness. Naruto pulled away from Sasuke only to drop to his knees between his legs.

Sasuke gasped softly.

“Naruto…” he hissed. He pulled feebly on the lapel of Naruto’s jacket. “You shouldn’t…”

Naruto was already starting to unbutton Sasuke’s pants. He licked and kissed the exposed skin, running the tip of his tongue over the coarse, black pubes.

Sasuke exhaled very softly.

“Don’t…” he said shakily. “Not here.”

Naruto stood and kissed him deeply. He pulled Sasuke closer to the edge of the desk and pressed their lower bodies together. Sasuke’s fingers curled sharply into Naruto’s scalp. His jaw slackened. His breath ghosted over Naruto’s lips. Naruto rocked his hips slowly and firmly against Sasuke’s. He felt his erection strain through his pants. The desire rolled through him like wildfire. It felt so good that it nearly hurt.

Without forewarning he pushed one hand down into Sasuke’s pants.

Sasuke gasped gruffly.

Naruto closed his hand around Sasuke’s cock. He almost hummed with satisfaction. He lapped at Sasuke’s lips, caressed his tongue softly. When he opened his eyes a smidgen, he watched how Sasuke’s eyes were closed and how blissful he looked with his mouth slightly open, eagerly accepting every touch of Naruto’s lips and tongue.

He opened his eyes a little, as though he noticed that Naruto was staring. Then he closed them again with a groan as Naruto stroked him.

“I missed you,” Naruto murmured. He kissed Sasuke’s neck, then he sucked lightly. “While you were gone… At first I didn’t know what I’d do without you…” He kissed Sasuke’s neck harder.

“Ah…” Sasuke murmured, his voice gruff. “I didn’t know… you felt that way… If I’d known… I would never have left.”

Naruto stopped the kisses, his lips just hovering right over Sasuke’s skin.

“You wouldn’t?”

“No… I thought I was nothing more than another one of your many friends.”

Naruto pulled back and stared at Sasuke.

“But… I told you… I said you were my one and only…”

“… Friend. Right?”

“Yes, but… You are an important friend! I thought you realized that…”

“…Then why did you barely speak to me after I came back?”

Naruto could hear that it took a lot for Sasuke to admit that. That he’d been hurt. He tried to keep his voice casual, but the hurt was evident even beneath the soft panting.

“I…” Naruto didn’t know what to say. He had been cowardly back then. He had distanced himself from Sasuke because he… he just didn’t know how to behave around him anymore. He didn’t know what they were to each other. Friends? Rivals? Or maybe… something else? Something that back then had been nearly unthinkable…

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

Sasuke cupped his cheek.

“It’s okay,” he said, and kissed Naruto softly. “It’s all in the past. There’s nothing we can do about it.”

Naruto embraced Sasuke and pulled him close. He nuzzled his neck and caressed his erection. Sasuke buried his nose against Naruto’s neck with a soft inhale. His hand traveled down Naruto’s back to his ass and squeezed it. Naruto groaned loudly.

Sasuke snorted. “Should have figured you’d be loud.”

Naruto nipped on the skin of Sasuke’s neck. His face was getting a bit warm. He hadn’t meant to be _that_ loud… Thankfully, the office was soundproof.

There was a sharp knock on the door.

The both of them froze, staring at each other like deer in headlight.

Then Sasuke teleported away, leaving Naruto standing there flustered, red faced and with tented pants. He hurried to sit down and turned the chair around so it was facing the windows just as Shikamaru opened the door. He ran a hand through his hair in the hopes of making it more presentable and straightened his jacket.

“Hokage-sama?”

“Yes?” Naruto turned around. “Sorry, I was just… taking a small break.”

Shikamaru’s eyes landed on the pink box on Naruto’s desk.

“Oh, Hinata sent you those?”

“Um… No, they’re from… Uh, I mean yes. She dropped by just now.”

“Strange… I didn’t meet her on the way. But it’s good to hear that you’re being taken care of,” Shikamaru said with a grin. “I was about to force you to take a break but I guess you’re good.”

He left and closed the door behind him.

“What the fuck am I doing…?” Naruto murmured and stared emptily at the seemingly unoffending pink box.

 

\-------

 

Sasuke leant against the wall, still out of breath. Thankfully he had teleported to a deserted back alley so no one accidentally saw him in his ruffled state. He straightened his clothes, zipped up his pants, and raked his fingers through his hair, hoping it didn’t look too tousled. Then he waited for a few minutes until he’d willed his erection away before he dared show himself publicly.

 

\------

 

The longing Naruto felt for Sasuke was like physical pain. Now that he knew how it felt to touch him, it was unbearable not to be able to. His thoughts would drift off to Sasuke every other minute. He barely got any work done. Hinata noticed that he was distracted. She would look distressed and sad when she had to address Naruto twice before he responded. He wished he could do something about it to make her feel better, but the only remedy to his situation was Sasuke. And he didn’t think Hinata would be very glad if she knew that.

His guilt was weighting him down more and more. Many times a day he thought of how he should never cheat on her again, and then in the next second he was lost in thoughts of Sasuke. He hated to use the word ‘cheating’ but he had to be honest with himself, no matter how much it devastated him. He had cheated on Hinata three times.

 

He was a horrible person and he knew it but he just couldn’t stop.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	3. Rinse And Repeat

 

Sakura was delightfully surprised when Naruto knocked on the door to the Uchiha residence one evening.

“It’s been so long!”

“Is Sasuke here?”

“Yes, come on in!”

Sakura was already headed towards the kitchen before Naruto had the chance to tell her he didn’t intend to stay long. He felt like he couldn’t come by without at least talking a bit with her, so he took off his shoes and followed her into the house. He had never been inside the Uchiha family’s house before. It was astounding how little of Sasuke he could find there. Even the pictures were mostly of Sakura and Sarada. Naruto wondered how Sasuke and Sakura had even managed to keep their marriage going for so long. He hadn’t offered it much thought until lately. He’d always felt like it wasn’t his table and besides he had been too caught up in his own life the last few years to even talk much to Sakura, so he never really got an update on their relationship.

“Do you want coffee or tea?” Sakura said.

“I really can’t stay too long…”

Sakura sent him a hurt look.

“… But I guess coffee would be nice.”

“One coffee coming up! I really feel like having a coffee myself. Sasuke never drinks it, though. He prefers tea.”

She put on a kettle of water.

“I’ll go and tell him you’re here.”

Naruto sat down by the kitchen table. He felt very uneasy at being in Sasuke and Sakura’s house. It was like he didn’t belong there. Suddenly, Sarada walked in. Her eyes went huge when she saw him.

“Seventh! What are you doing here?” She frowned. “Dad or mom didn’t do something wrong, did they?”

Naruto chuckled. “I’m on a friendly visit.”

“Oh… In that case.”

She went and got some cookies. She put one in her mouth. On her way out she stopped and looked at him.

“You won’t tell mom, right?” She said around her cookie.

Naruto grinned. “Of course not. It’s our secret.”

She grinned and hurried off.

Sakura came back with Sasuke in tow a minute later. Sasuke didn’t ask why he was there. Sakura made small talk while Sasuke stayed mostly silent. Naruto’s eyes kept darting towards the clock. He should be getting home soon. He’d told Hinata he’d be home by dinner. Also, he was feeling like a third wheel. Each time Sakura stood close to Sasuke or placed a hand on his shoulder, Naruto had to stop himself from cringing. He looked away instead.

But the worst part was when Sasuke would look at her with a soft, familiar look. It made Naruto realize that what he and Sasuke were doing was insanity.

He put his half finished coffee down and stood.

“This was really nice. Sakura, it was good talking to you. I need to get home now. Hinata probably has dinner ready.”

“Oh, yes, sure!” Sakura still had her hand on Sasuke’s shoulder.

Naruto looked away.

“Um… Sasuke, I’ll see you.”

Sasuke caught up to him in the hallway.

“I’ll walk you out.”

“You don’t need-”

Sasuke was already putting on his shoes and then he rushed Naruto out of the house. Instead of walking to the street, Sasuke led them through the backyard and into the woods behind the house. The house was lying at the edge of town, and the forest stretched behind it and the other stately houses in the neighborhood.

Naruto followed Sasuke until they were out of sight from the houses. Then Sasuke turned around and pinned Naruto to a tree. Any thoughts Naruto had had about rejecting Sasuke flew away the second their lips met. Actually, any thoughts at all flew out of Naruto’s head and just left a pleasant buzz.

Sasuke’s lips were insistent. He pressed Naruto hard against the tree, almost like he wanted to crush him. Naruto accepted the more and more heated kisses with equal passion. He fisted his hands in Sasuke’s hair and distantly noted how coarse it was. He moaned out loud at the thought of how different Sasuke felt from Hinata. Then he abruptly turned away when he thought about her. He suddenly remembered the last time he slept with her. Her silky hair that barely tickled the nape of her pale, smooth neck… Her supple curves and her soft skin…

Sasuke tried to kiss him again, but Naruto turned away.

“Wait…” He said, breathless. “I can’t…”

Sasuke stared at him. “What?”

Naruto shook his head.

“You can’t what?” There was a strange, unusual despair in Sasuke’s eyes. He covered it over by putting on a mask of indifference.

He let go of Naruto and took a step back. “You’re right,” he said, his face emotionless but his voice sharp. “We shouldn’t be doing this.”

Naruto wanted to reach out and pull Sasuke back when he turned and disappeared in between the trees, but he forced himself to stay put. He bit his teeth together until he was certain that he wouldn’t run after Sasuke. Then he headed home.

 

\-------

 

For the first time since he came back, Sasuke wished to leave Konoha again. Naruto’s rejection had hurt more than he cared to admit. When he told Sakura about his plans, she looked devastated.

“But… Why? You’ve finished your mission. You can come home now.”

“I’ll never finish my mission.”

Sakura’s face fell slowly. It was heartbreaking to watch, but Sasuke wouldn’t budge. He couldn’t stay just for her sake. He was withering away. She must notice that too.

“What about Sarada?” She whispered.

“I’ll come back as often as I can.”

Sakura stood so abruptly that her chair toppled over. She bit her lip. Tears were threatening to spill down her cheeks.

“Why… Why won’t you love me?”

Sasuke’s hand clenched. He got a flashback from twelve years ago, when Sakura had followed him on his travels. She had broken down and started crying, asking him why he wouldn’t love her. Back then he had let guilt win. This time he wondered why she said ‘won’t’ like it was a choice. 

“I do love you,” he said softly.

Sakura wiped her tears away and sniffed. “Then why won’t you stay with me?”

“It’s not about love, it’s-”

He stopped when he saw Sakura shake her head.

“If you love someone, you’ll be willing to sacrifice things for them. I’ve sacrificed my career for you for the last ten years, waiting for you till you came back. Isn’t it time for you to sacrifice something too?”

Sasuke stood calmly.

“Sakura… If telling you that I love you isn’t enough, then I don’t know what is. I never asked you to sacrifice anything for me. If you recall, when I was sent away on the last mission you said you understood. Furthermore, you knew how I felt about this town when you married me. You know that I don’t feel like I belong here. You know that I need to get away at times.”

“I thought you’d change,” she whispered. “When we had Sarada and… I thought that we could be enough to make you want to stay.”

“You are enough to make me want to come back.”

Sakura bit her lips. “That’s not enough,” she whispered.

“Then I’m sorry you feel that way.”

 

\-------

 

Naruto found the note from Sasuke when he came to work that morning. It said, ‘I’m leaving Konoha tonight. I hope you’re certain you made the right choice.’

He hurried over to the Uchiha residence.

It was Sakura who opened. She looked drawn, like she’d been crying.

Naruto didn’t even have to ask. She just shook her head.

So Sasuke had left _that_ night. He was already gone.

Naruto’s hand clenched around the note. He raced back to the hokage tower.

“Shikamaru, I’m heading out. Urgent business.”

Shikamaru looked like a question mark. “How long will you be gone?”

“Not long, hopefully. Expect me back tomorrow.”

 

\-------

 

He caught up to Sasuke about half a days travel east of Konoha. He couldn’t have been travelling fast.

Naruto landed on the road in front of Sasuke.

“If you’re leaving because of me,” he said, breathless from having ran at top speed the entire way. “Then please rethink. Think about Sakura and Sarada; your family. They need you!”

Sasuke shook his head.

“You don’t get it, do you?”

Naruto frowned. “I get that you’re acting childish!”

Sasuke walked closer to him. “Naruto… I’ve always come back to Konoha because of you. Now I have my family too and they make it much easier to come back, but the only reason I could come back even when I hated the place… was because of you.”

He was so close to Naruto now that their noses were barely inches from each other.

“Did you never consider that the fact that I gladly accepted a mission that would keep me away from Konoha for years was so that I wouldn’t have to look at you and that Hyuuga girl being happy together?”

Naruto couldn’t get out a word. He was speechless.

“I don’t understand why you’d still choose her when you’re so obviously unhappy with her…” Sasuke continued. “But I can’t tell you what to do. Now, if you really love me you’ll allow me to have some time to myself.”

He brushed Naruto’s shoulder as he passed him.

“And besides,” he said over his shoulder. “Why is it that you and Sakura always use my family as a way to force me to do what you want me to? I just need to be alone right now. It would be nice if you could respect that for once.”

 

\-------

 

A few months after Sasuke left, Sakura and Sarada got a message from him and went to meet him in a village a few days march from Konoha. Naruto learned it from Hinata a few days after they’d left. The ache he felt at hearing that was almost too much to bear. That day he acted so strange that Hinata asked him if he was all right. All he did for the next few days was to sleep and work. Whenever he wasn’t working, he locked himself in his bedroom, avoiding talking to anyone. The only ones he made an effort for was Himawari and Boruto. They were pleased that he was home earlier than usual, but concerned that he was sleeping all the time.

He told Himawari that he was just very tired lately, and needed to sleep a lot. So she brought her bedtime stories with her and bundled up in bed next to him. She read to him until she almost nodded off herself, and then Naruto took over and read until she fell asleep.

It was nice to be closer to his kids, at least, and Hinata didn’t bother him much. She seemed to sense that he needed alone time. Naruto felt a stab in the heart when he remembered what Sasuke had said. ‘I just need to be alone sometimes.’ He was right… Naruto should learn to respect that. His pushiness had worked out well for them before, but maybe it wasn’t always in its place. Sometimes, people just needed to be alone. Especially when they were hurting.

Now he knew that Sasuke had chosen to leave Konoha because he’d been hurting, and it had been Naruto’s fault. If it was anywhere near as bad as Naruto was feeling now, then he understood Sasuke’s need to get away.

He missed him… He missed Sasuke so much.

Instead of coming to the village, giving Naruto the chance to see him, he contacted only his family and had them meet him alone for some quality time…. It hurt.

Naruto realized that he had been blessed by his own dimwit in the sense that he never had to experience this kind of pain when Sasuke married Sakura since at that point he was deep in denial. But it must have been terrible for Sasuke… If he knew he loved Naruto already back then… To find out that Naruto had married someone else…

Naruto could imagine the pain that must have caused now. And he knew Sasuke must have been in pain if what he’d told Naruto was anything to go by.

_I’ve always come back to Konoha because of you._

Naruto curled up tighter on the bed and cried not only for himself, but for Sasuke too.

 

\--------

 

Sasuke came back home with Sakura and Sarada. Naruto only learned about it when Boruto and his team delivered their mission report and Sarada answered a quip from Mitsuki with, “Ugh, don’t make me think about it. Mom and dad are so sickeningly happy nowadays.”

Despite her words, she had a small smile on her lips.

Naruto quelled the urge to ask her more about it. He was determined not to pry into Sasuke and Sakura’s business again. But he couldn’t stop thinking about it. What had happened that had made them so ‘sickeningly happy’? Had they made up? Were they happy together now?

Naruto told himself he hoped so, but the truth was that just the thought of them looking at each other… the way Sasuke had looked at Sakura that time… touching each other so tenderly… It made him hurt so much and shockingly it also made him a bit angry with Sakura. He’d never been angry with her before. She’d always had a special place in his heart. But right then he couldn’t help but almost _hate_ her.

Appalled by his own feelings he hurried to quell them, determined never to think of her that way again.

 

\-------

 

It was raining lightly outside, but Naruto kept the window to his office open because he liked the smell of rain. Most people would probably think that he was the type of person who loved warmer and happier scents, but the truth was that there was something about rain that just… Truth be told, it somehow reminded him of Sasuke.

It was getting late but Naruto was still deeply focused on his papers when he suddenly sensed a presence in the room. He turned slowly towards the windowsill to his right. Sasuke sat leant on it, dressed in all black. He was just quietly observing Naruto working, but when Naruto looked at him he gave him a small smile.

It was like a dam broke inside of Naruto.

“Sasuke,” he whispered.

Before it was even a conscious thought, he had thrown himself into Sasuke’s arms. Sasuke embraced him tightly.

“I’m sorry,” Naruto murmured. “I’m so sorry. Don’t leave me again.”

Sasuke rested his chin on Naruto’s head. He didn’t speak, but Naruto imagined that he too felt how the world sort of shifted into place around them at that moment, making everything feel more at peace.

“Then don’t drive me away.”

Naruto burrowed his face into Sasuke’s chest and inhaled the scent of him. He could sense a lingering draft of a sweet, flowery perfume.

He pulled away.

“Did you and Sakura… make up?”

Sasuke’s gaze got an edge to it.

“What did you think Naruto? That I’d sit around and wait for you to change your mind?”

“No,” Naruto hurried to say. “I was just curious, that’s all.”

“We made up, yes. She’s happy again. I’ll stay in Konoha a little longer this time.”

“That’s great!” Naruto tried to channel as much happiness as he could into his smile. “It’s great.”

His gaze lingered on Sasuke, and Sasuke met it. Naruto hurried to take a step away from him before he did something stupid.

“I was just finishing up here, actually, so if there wasn’t anything special…?”

“No, I just came to see you.”

Sasuke stood and straightened his cloak. Naruto felt his heart warm up to the core at the thought that Sasuke dropped by without any other reason than to just see him.

“If you can spare a minute, we could walk home together?”

“Sure.”

 

\-------

 

It had been easy to make it up to Sakura. Too easy. The weekend they had alone together as a family had done wonders to repair the bonds between them. He just needed to give Sakura one whole night of affection and she was like putty in his hands again. It was starting to dawn on him how easy it was for him to use her. She served herself on a silver platter, not caring what she got back from him as long as she got only the tiniest bit of attention.

It couldn’t be healthy. It wasn’t healthy. Not for either of them. But it was easy and safe and it was what they were used to. So that’s how they continued.

 

\-------

 

“You seem happier today,” Hinata commented the next morning.

Naruto looked up at her from his bowl of cereal. “Huh? Oh… Yeah, I’m feeling better.”

She smiled. “I’m glad.”

She seemed honestly happy for Naruto’s sake. Naruto’s mood fell a little bit.

“Uh… Hinata?”

“Hm…?”

She was busy making a bento for Boruto. It had been years since she made one for Naruto. She used to insist on making one extra large for him every morning and it had taken Naruto a long, long time to convince her not to. He didn’t want to trouble her, especially not when he gave her back so little. She made him food that would last him through the entire day because she knew he worked a lot. In the beginning he used to love it. But in the last few years it just reminded him how much she was willing to do for him and how little he was able to do for her.

“No… It was nothing…”

 

 

 


	4. Count Your Blessings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally a little quality time alone for our two favorite boys :)

 

“You sent for me.”

Naruto looked up from his papers. Sasuke had entered the office so quietly that he hadn’t noticed.

“Yes. I need you to accompany me to the kage summit.”

“… Shouldn’t you bring your advisor instead?”

“Shikamaru has other business to take care off and you’re the only other person I know I can trust one hundred percent with this.” Naruto grinned up at Sasuke. “I know we’ll work well together. You’re calm where I’m rash and you’re strategically intelligent where I am emotionally intelligent. So? What do you say?”

“I’d be honored to.”

“Don’t be so formal,” Naruto said. “Great. We’ll leave tomorrow morning. I’ll give you a briefing on the way there.”

 

\-------

 

The meeting was held in Suna. The weather was hot and the air was dry. At the end of the day it was a blessing to relax in an onsen. Naruto tried not to stare at Sasuke too openly. He was grateful when he could sink down into the hot water. Sasuke came and sat close to him. Their shoulders touched and the contact sent small tingles through Naruto’s body. He tried not to think of it too much, but that was impossible. It was soon the only thing he could think of.

He knew he shouldn’t, but he couldn’t stop his hand from seeking out Sasuke’s thigh. He felt Sasuke tense slightly when the tips of his fingers grazed his skin and feared that he might push him away, but he didn’t. His face was turned away from Naruto, but his body pushed closer beneath the water. Naruto let his hand linger. He felt Sasuke move his thigh closer, spreading his legs a little. He tried to control his breathing and was glad that the hotness in the onsen made his blush less conspicuous. He inched his hand slowly up Sasuke’s thigh and felt Sasuke shudder almost imperceptibly. He realized how much he needed Sasuke right then. He wished he could take him with him out of there and straight to his room, but it would look suspicious. Not to mention that he needed to will away his erection before he could get out of there. He pulled his hand back and sat up straighter. Sasuke remained close to him.

Naruto cleared his throat.

“Thank you for coming with me,” he said.

“It was nothing. I enjoyed it.”

“I could tell,” Naruto grinned. “You’re a born leader.”

“So are you.”

Naruto shrugged. “Not exactly. I had to work a lot to make people trust me. You seem to be able to make people respect you even thought they initially don't trust you.”

He appreciated the slight blush on Sasuke’s cheeks. It made his slowly wilting erection come back with full force.

When a few minutes later Sasuke said he was getting out and asked if Naruto was coming, Naruto lied and said he wanted to stay for a little while longer. Truth was that as long as Sasuke was close to him he had no chance of leaving in a decent way.

 

\-------

 

When he knocked on Sasuke’s door later that night, he had no idea what to expect. Sasuke opened wearing the hotels white bathrobe. He leant on the doorway.

“Can I come in?” Naruto asked.

Sasuke hesitated for a second before stepping aside and letting Naruto in. He closed the door behind them.

“Your room is bigger than mine,” Naruto said with a pout.

“There had been a mistake,” Sasuke said. “I got a double bed though I was meant to have a single.”

Sasuke sat down on the bed. “Was there anything special you wanted? I was about to go to bed.”

Naruto blushed. He couldn’t believe he was about to do this, but…

“I can’t go on like this.”

Sasuke’s face closed off slightly. “What are you talking about?” He didn’t sound curious. He sounded like he already knew.

“This. Us. I…” He ran one hand through his hair. Then he abruptly turned towards the window. It had a nice view towards the softly lit garden. “You know what I’m talking about,” he murmured.

When he turned back, Sasuke was staring down at his hand.

“Actually… I don’t know,” Sasuke said. He looked up at Naruto. “What is it you want? A one-night stand? To get it out of your system? Or what?”

“No! Of course not, no… I told you… I love you.”

“Then why…” Sasuke voice broke off at a desperate note. He took a deep breath and visibly got a hold of himself. “… Why are you playing with me?”

“I’m not… I didn’t want to…” Naruto took a step closer to Sasuke. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to play with you, I’m just… I’m confused…”

He sat down on the edge of the bed, far enough away from Sasuke not to impose on him.

“I want to stay true to Hinata, but even my own mind wont allow it. It’s like I’m unfaithful even when I’m right next to her.”

He inched a little closer to Sasuke.

“I wanted to stay true, but I can’t. Not when you’re around.” He moved closer still, till he could reach out to Sasuke. But he didn’t. “I can’t just be friends with you anymore.”

Finally Sasuke looked at him. “Me neither.”

His eyes were closed off. Naruto couldn’t get a proper read on him. He wasn’t sure if he was being rejected or not. Then Sasuke’s expression softened a bit and a dark despair came to the surface of his eyes.

“Kiss me, for fucks sake,” he said.

Naruto surged forward. The raw despair in their kiss was fulfilling and frantic at the same time. Naruto didn’t know how to move or where to touch. There was no refinement, just raw, deep desire. Sasuke was naked under the robe. Naruto pushed him easily back on the bed and drank in the sight of his naked body. In the onsen he’d been careful about not looking, but now he could stare as much as he wanted.

Sasuke pulled him down for another kiss when he got impatient with Naruto’s staring. He wrenched off Naruto’s t-shirt and ran his hand over his chest. Naruto let out moan.

Sasuke chuckled.

“What?” Naruto asked, dazed.

“If you’re already this loud…” Sasuke murmured. He snuck two fingers under the edge of Naruto’s pants, the back of his fingers touching Naruto’s abdomen. “Then I wonder…” Sasuke trailed off, placing kisses down Naruto’s shoulder and chest. Naruto shuddered. Sasuke moved his fingers so that they were touching the side of Naruto’s erection. He bit back a hiss. As Sasuke worked his pants open one-handed, Naruto let his eyes rove down Sasuke’s body to where his erection curved up above his abdomen.

“Figure’s you’re pretty there too,” Naruto murmured under his breath. He placed one hand around the base of Sasuke’s cock and got a soft hum in reaction.

Sasuke pulled down Naruto’s pants and boxers with an impatient tug.

“Take them off,” he urged.

Naruto hurried to kick them off and crawled over Sasuke, naked. Sasuke spread his legs for Naruto to lie down between them. Naruto’s mind reeled at the indication that Sasuke would want to… Or were his hopes just getting ahead of him?

He lowered himself over Sasuke so that their skin met, from chest to hips. Sasuke cupped the back of Naruto’s head. He kissed Naruto again and ran his hand from his hair down his back and up again. Naruto rolled his hips and gasped into Sasuke’s mouth. He heard Sasuke’s breath come in eager small puffs.

He pushed away a bit so that he could watch Sasuke’s face, and ground their hips together again. Sasuke’s eyelids fluttered slightly and his mouth opened.

Naruto couldn’t take his eyes off him. He rolled his hips again just to see that lax, blissed expression on Sasuke’s face again.

“What are you staring at?” Sasuke grumbled breathlessly.

Naruto kissed him.

“I… I have something… Just wait a minute…” Naruto said, and stood from the bed.

 

\-------

 

Sasuke watched Naruto walk around the room naked, his erection swaying, as he found the condom and the lube that he’d brought with him.

“You planned this?” Sasuke asked.

“No, I just… like to be prepared, ya know?”

“… While on a trip away from your wife?”

Naruto’s cheeks became red.

“Do you do this often?” Sasuke said.

“No! I’ve never done this before…”

“So… You did it for me? Is that the only reason why you brought me?”

“Of course not! I always bring lube on long trips. The condom, I, uh… I bought them today, just before I came here.” Naruto sat down next to Sasuke on the bed. “I’ve thought about bringing you to a meeting for a while actually. I knew you’d be perfect at this and I was right. The other kage listen to you. They respect you.”

Sasuke sat up and kissed him. Naruto closed his eyes and delved into it eagerly. When Sasuke pulled away Naruto looked dazed for a second before he managed to collect his thoughts.

“Okay, so… How do we do this?” he asked.

Sasuke had no idea. He’d never done it with a man before.

Naruto answered his own question.

“I thought that… since I’m the one who brought the lube and all, I should get to use it?”

He gave Sasuke a cheeky smile.

Sasuke felt his face get warm. He didn’t even try to argue, although his pride told him he should. The truth was, he wanted it so much and… he wanted Naruto to be the one to do it to him. He wanted Naruto inside of him.

At the lack of protest from Sasuke, Naruto’s expression slowly went from playful to puzzled to surprised. Sasuke felt his face burn with embarrassment that he was willingly putting himself in this position in front of Naruto of all people.

“Fine,” he said at last. “I guess it’s only fair.”

He’d expected Naruto to gloat about it, maybe even ridicule him, but instead he looked overcome.

“I… Uh…” he looked down at the lube and condom in his hands. “Okay…”

Sasuke realized he was probably more at a loss of what exactly to do next than Sasuke was.

“Come here,” Sasuke murmured, and pulled Naruto into a kiss.

After a moment Naruto relaxed a bit. He pulled Sasuke closer and deepened the kiss. They fell back on the bed, Sasuke beneath Naruto. Naruto tried to shift so that he was between Sasuke’s legs, almost elbowing his shoulder in the process. They were a tangle of legs and arms for a moment as they attempted to coordinate their movements. Finally Naruto settled over Sasuke and the kisses deepened. His fingers trailed over Sasuke’s skin, leaving goosebumps. He kissed along Sasuke’s cheek and down to his jaw. He stopped for a second to bury his nose in Sasuke’s hair. Sasuke was starting to realize that Naruto went by scent a lot. He seemed to like how Sasuke smelled. For some reason Sasuke found that extremely hot.

He ran his fingertips over the soft, vulnerable skin under Naruto’s chin and behind his ear. Then he pulled him down to nuzzle his hair.

Naruto groaned very softly. His lips moved down along Sasuke’s neck, leaving a trail of feathery kisses. Once he nipped at Sasuke’s skin, then he placed a lingering kiss on the spot like an apology.

The further down Naruto’s lips traveled, the dizzier with need Sasuke became. Naruto was moving far too slow. Sasuke reached out and grabbed the tube of lube. He grabbed Naruto’s hand. By then Naruto was adorning Sasuke’s stomach with kisses. Naruto watched with wide eyes, pupils dilated, as Sasuke squeezed a dollop of lube out onto his palm.

He hesitated for a second before he leant on one elbow and slipped his lubed hand in between Sasuke’s thighs. He probed a little carefully at first, almost a little shyly. Sasuke spread his legs some more, initial shyness long forgotten. When he felt Naruto’s finger probe in between his ass cheeks, he shuddered. Naruto looked a little worried like he wondered if Sasuke disliked it. Sasuke shook his head.

“Go on,” he breathed.

Naruto started probing a bit more confidently and then his finger suddenly slipped inside of Sasuke. He looked amazed, like he hadn’t believed that this was actually what they were going to do. He looked up at Sasuke as if needing confirmation to go on. Then he carefully started moving his finger while watching Sasuke’s face intently.

Sasuke held his gaze. He had always found Naruto’s eyes easy to read. His feelings seemed to always be mirrored in them. But now it was like a veil that Sasuke had no idea existed had been taken down and the blue, beautiful eyes of his most precious person looked completely vulnerable. He kissed Sasuke’s stomach tentatively, keeping the eye contact. Sasuke wondered if his eyes had always been such a light blue, almost transparent color or if it was just the lighting in the room making them look so.

He reflexively closed his eyes when Naruto’s finger probed deeper. He could practically feel Naruto observing him with wonder.

“There… deeper…” Sasuke murmured, guiding Naruto onwards. “Crook your finger…”

He jolted when Naruto pressed too hard. “Careful,” he snapped.

“Sorry,” Naruto murmured.

He tried again, gentler.

“Have you…” Naruto hesitated. “Have you done this before?”

Sasuke felt his face grow warm.

“Yes,” he said quietly.

Naruto stared at him with an expression that was somewhere between surprised and worried.

“With whom?”

“No one… Just…”

Naruto’s eyes lit up. “You did it alone?”

“Maybe,” Sasuke growled. “…Once or twice.”

Naruto couldn’t stop grinning. His finger suddenly got a bit more confident and Sasuke automatically rocked down on it.

“Did you think about me when you did it?” Naruto murmured.

Sasuke saw no point in lying. “Yes.”

He felt a second finger probe at his entrance. He knew it would slip in easily. Naruto got a concentrated look on his face. He looked down at where his fingers disappeared inside of Sasuke, his mouth half open. When he got more attuned to how much pressure he could use he got skilled pretty fast.

Sasuke tried not to think of where Naruto had learnt to use his fingers so efficiently. He’d rather not think too hard about anything besides them in that moment. He tried to relax. He was getting too tense, thinking about his regrets even while he was making new ones. He had closed his eyes and didn’t notice what Naruto was up to before he felt a moist heat close around the head of his cock.

His eyes shot up. He moaned softly.

Naruto looked right at him. His fingers were still gently loosening him up, but his focus was on Sasuke’s face.

“Naruto,” Sasuke whispered. He didn’t know what he meant to say. One part of him wanted to tell Naruto that he didn’t need to... He couldn’t repay this… Another much bigger part of him just marveled at how sexy his former rival looked as his lips stretched around Sasuke’s cock and took him in deeper.

It was obvious that Naruto had no idea what he was doing, but damn if he didn’t make the most out of it nevertheless. He tried to take Sasuke in as deep as he could, and almost choked on him. Then he pulled back and tried again a little more gently. Just watching him going down on him to a point that Sasuke hadn’t thought possible was enough to make him come dangerously close to the edge of an orgasm.

He gasped Naruto’s name and alternated between rocking down on his fingers or into his mouth.

“I-I’m…” he murmured. He could barely get the words out.

Naruto pulled back and Sasuke’s cock slipped out of his mouth with a pop. Then he pulled out his fingers and crawled up until he was face to face with Sasuke.

“Ready?”

Sasuke just nodded. He reckoned he looked slightly dazed.

He spread his legs and Naruto settled between them. He had put on a condom and slicked himself up at some point. He leant on one hand over Sasuke while he tried to guide his own cock towards Sasuke’s asshole. It was a bit awkward for a moment while they tried to coordinate their bodies. Despite the fact that they worked in nearly perfect tandem on the battlefield, they became extremely clumsy in bed.

Sasuke felt the head of Naruto’s cock press in between his ass cheeks, but it didn’t go inside. Sasuke lifted one leg and tried to hook it around Naruto’s waist, but it just slid down with nothing to hang onto and Naruto’s arm in the way. Naruto tried again but his cock just slid up between Sasuke’s ass cheeks. They looked at each other, both a little frustrated and uncomfortable. Then a twinkle of humor passed Naruto’s eyes. He chuckled.

Sasuke snorted and smiled a bit too. This was silly.

“I can’t even get it in,” Naruto muttered.

“Try again. You’ll get it eventually.”

Naruto rolled his eyes at Sasuke’s patronizing tone.

He adjusted himself, this time bringing Sasuke’s leg up to his waist and keeping it there with his elbow.

“Maybe it would help if you spread your legs more,” he said pointedly.

Sasuke felt he was already spread out enough, but he bent his other leg too and hooked them both around Naruto’s waist.

Naruto tried again, and this time he slipped in.

Sasuke’s eyes widened. Comically, surely, but he had not been prepared. He had to focus on catching his breath. Naruto felt much bigger than he looked, and he hadn’t exactly looked small…

He tried to push in further, but Sasuke pressed his hand to his chest, hard. Naruto looked down at him with a dazed expression.

“Goddammit, it’s so fucking tight…” he leant his head on Sasuke’s shoulder. “I think I’m dying,” he groaned, mostly in pain.

“Don’t move,” Sasuke warned.

“I’m not!”

“You are!”

“I have to breathe, dammit!”

“Then breathe less!”

They lay there for what felt like an eternity. Naruto inched slowly more and more inside, but was quickly stopped by Sasuke.

“Could you try to relax?” Naruto ground out.

“Relax yourself,” Sasuke said. “Don’t breathe.”

Naruto looked affronted. He opened his mouth.

“Don’t talk,” Sasuke snapped.

He felt like he was being thorn apart, but it also felt good. It was just… It was so much… He felt like Naruto pressed further and further in and it would just never stop. It felt so good at times and other times it was unbearable.

“I’m almost all the way inside,” Naruto bit out between clenched teeth.

Sasuke groaned as he slipped even further in. Then Naruto stopped for a bit. He leant down and kissed Sasuke’s brow. Then he leant his forehead against Sasuke’s. Sasuke opened his eyes and met Naruto’s gaze. For a suspended moment they just watched each other. Then Naruto slowly began to move.

Sasuke grabbed his shoulder. Naruto took it slowly, excruciatingly slow, all the while watching Sasuke. Then he started moving in gentle, small thrusts. He kissed Sasuke’s lips and then his brow again. Sasuke felt his body relax as the discomfort slowly and surely turned into something good. There was a small sting of discomfort still left, but it was starting to get overruled by the immensely satisfying feeling of being so full. Naruto stretched him wide and penetrated him deeply, all the while being careful not to hurt him.

Sasuke started arching up to him. His knees nearly met his chest but he didn’t care. He didn’t care that he was spread out so willingly underneath Naruto, didn’t care that he was loosing control of both his voice and his expressions.

He closed his arm around Naruto’s back so that he could draw him nearer and feel his whole body against his. He moved his hips frantically against Naruto’s, but never quite in time with his thrusts. He heard the small grunts Naruto gave as he thrust in. He placed kisses along his shoulder and neck, buried his nose in his hair and inhaled the warm, musky scent of him.

Then it was like something clicked and suddenly they moved in perfect synchronicity. Naruto moved faster and thrust harder. His breath came in gasps.

“Slower,” Sasuke groaned.

He could feel how it took a lot of Naruto’s willpower to slow down. He loved to feel that kind of power on top of him. Ten years ago he would have never been able to admit that, not even to himself, but now he didn’t care anymore.

“I’m close,” Naruto murmured. He burrowed himself inside of Sasuke and thrust frenetically.

“Sasuke… Ah… I… Ahh!”

He stilled, his whole body tense. His nose was buried in Sasuke’s hair and his hands were clutching Sasuke’s head.

“Goood…” He groaned. “So good, Sasuke… I… You’re…” He panted against Sasuke’s neck. With great effort he leant on his elbows. He stared down at Sasuke with the most sappily affectionate look Sasuke had ever seen.

“I love you,” he murmured and kissed Sasuke.

Then he made his way down along Sasuke’s body, kissing his way down to the red, swollen erection that begged for his attention. Sasuke’s eyes nearly rolled back in his head when Naruto took him into his mouth and pressed his fingers into Sasuke’s wet, relaxed hole. Sasuke let go of all control and just gave in to the firm, loving attention from his partner. It didn’t take long before he came into Naruto’s mouth. Naruto made sure they kept eye contact the whole time, his eyes glimmering with mischief as he watched Sasuke come undone.

Sasuke felt elated and nearly… giddy in the wake of it. He didn’t realize he had a stupid grin on his face until Naruto commented on it.

“If I’d known you just needed a good fuck to ease down I would have done this a long time ago.”

Sasuke shoved him.

“But honestly,” Naruto said. “If we’d done this before you left Konoha the first time, it could have saved us a lot of trouble.”

Sasuke shoved him again, harder.

Naruto just gave an obnoxious laugh. “Just admit it,” he cackled. “You’ve been thirsty for me since you knew what hormones were.”

Sasuke wanted to deny that, but Naruto was actually right. So Sasuke settled for frowning.

“And all those girls…” Naruto continued. “If only they’d known. They could have spared themselves a lot of heartache.”

His face fell a little. Sasuke guessed that his thoughts went to Sakura, just as Sasuke’s had. Naruto moved closer. Sasuke offered his arm for him to lie on. Naruto snuggled close to his chest.

“Sasuke… do you ever…” He started saying, but then he broke off. Sasuke waited for him to finish but just minutes later his breathing had evened out and he was fast asleep.

 

\-------

 

Sasuke groaned at the blinding daylight that had snuck in through a crack between the curtains. He opened his eyes slowly, only to find a pair of blue eyes looking at him from just a few inches away from his face.

Naruto smiled at him.

Sasuke couldn’t help but smile back. His body felt so light and relaxed. Seeing Naruto’s face first thing in the morning was surprisingly nice.

“Good morning,” Naruto murmured. He was unusually subdued. “I ordered breakfast. Do you want it now?”

Breakfast sounded perfect. He tried to hide his wince as he sat up, but Naruto noticed it.

“Are you okay?” He sounded worried.

“I’m fine. I’ll just take a shower, then we can eat.”

He pulled on the white bathrobe and went to the bathroom. After his shower he felt a little better. Naruto sat cross-legged on the bed next to a tray filled with delicious food. Sasuke realized how hungry he was. He sat down next to Naruto with a small wince. Naruto reached out and touched the small of his back with a bit hesitance. Then he leant in and kissed Sasuke almost chastely. Sasuke leant into the kiss and tried to show through it that things were okay between them. That he didn’t regret anything. He felt Naruto relax a bit. He wasn’t entirely sure whether it was through his body language or through the small thread of chakra that he always could perceive from Naruto that he conveyed his emotions.

 

\------

 

As their departure drew closer, both Sasuke and Naruto became quieter. For the last half an hour before they left they just lay next to each other in silence, soaking up the feeling of just being together. Sasuke held his hand over Naruto’s naked chest, feeling his heart beat steadily against his palm. He inhaled the scent of Naruto’s skin and wished he could bottle it so that he could smell it forever.

The entire trip home they were quiet. They didn’t travel fast and the closer they came to Konoha the slower they went. The last few miles they walked in a leisurely tempo. About an hour from Konoha, Naruto suddenly grabbed Sasuke’s hand and led him off the road into the forest. He stopped when they couldn’t see the road anymore.

He cradled Sasuke’s face and kissed him tenderly. Sasuke closed his eyes.

“I wish I could be with you forever,” Naruto murmured.

Sasuke wanted to say so many things but he knew that words were useless. It couldn’t change their situation.

If Naruto hadn’t been the hokage, then maybe… just maybe they could have tried. If they didn’t have their families to think of and ten years worth of time devoted to someone else… If they had figured out things earlier… Then…

Sasuke suddenly felt very vulnerable. He wanted to stay with Naruto right there and not go back. He wasn’t sure he could cope with trying to live happily with Sakura anymore. It hurt just thinking about being forced away from Naruto again. He loped his arm around Naruto’s neck and held him tight. Naruto rubbed Sasuke’s back in slow circles.

“It should have been us,” Sasuke whispered.

“…I know.”

 

 

 


	5. Out Of Control

 

Sasuke noticed how unfamiliar he and Sakura were with each other, now more than ever. After the week together with Naruto he had started distancing himself from her even more than before. But still she looked at him with the same infatuation and loving devotion as always.

Her unrelenting and naïve love for him didn’t make things easier. He imagined how she’d react if he suggested they should get a divorce. He tried to think of the least devastating way to tell her, but he could think of nothing that wouldn’t break her heart. He started to realize why Naruto had been so hesitant to break it off with Hinata even when he knew he didn’t love her anymore.

How had they gotten into this mess? Marrying girls they felt nothing for just because they were so devoted to them… He remembered still how guilt ridden he had been about Sakura after… everything… When she finally had decided to chase him he hadn’t been able to say no. At the time he had managed to convince himself that he loved her. He did love her, but now he could see that it hadn’t been the right kind of love. He loved her more like a sister than a lover and it had felt wrong to try and force their love into being something it wasn’t. Sasuke had a feeling that he only could fall in love with men. Or maybe it was just Naruto. He didn’t know. He would probably never know because as long as Naruto existed he couldn’t love anyone else.

 

\------

 

Sasuke couldn’t wait more than a few days before he had to see Naruto again. In the evening long after everyone else had left, Naruto was still at his office. Sasuke wondered what was making him work himself so hard. It was devastating to watch how he hunched down among piles of books and papers, working quietly in the cold, bluish light from his computer. He didn’t even notice Sasuke entering the room.

And yet, when Sasuke gently placed a hand on his shoulder he didn’t startle. Sasuke knew that he had felt somewhere deep inside of him that Sasuke’s presence was near. After the night they’d spent together they had become more attuned to each other. Where before Sasuke had only been able to pinpoint Naruto’s location, now he could feel his chakra like a warm, fuzzy ball inside his chest that got warmer and brighter the closer he got to him.

Naruto looked up at him with tired eyes. He tried to smile but it became more like a grimace.

“You’re overworking yourself,” Sasuke murmured. He brushed his knuckles against Naruto’s stubble. Naruto leant into the touch like a puppy starving for affection.

Sasuke leant against the desk and Naruto leaned back in his chair with a sigh. He rubbed his eyes.

“Just a little bit longer,” he said, “And I’ll be done with these reports. Then I can go home.”

“Why don’t you just hire someone to help you?”

“I can’t just do that.”

“Yes, you can… That’s one of the perks of being Hokage. You can hire people to do the dirty jobs.”

“But I need to make sure everything is in order –“

“Someone else can do that just as well as you.”

“But they need my approval –“

“You don’t need to read the whole thing to give your approval.”

“I guess… But it doesn’t feel right. And besides, I can make a shitload of clones who can do the job for me!”

Sasuke pointedly looked around the room.

“Um…” Naruto gave him a sheepish grin. “Except when I’m too tired to make clones…”

“You should take a break,” Sasuke said.

Naruto gave the heaviest sigh Sasuke had ever heard any man give. “I can’t… I…” He threw a look at the watch. “I should have been home three hours ago.” The guilt in his voice made Sasuke heart clench.

Naruto rubbed his brow. “I… I’m such a lousy husband… And a lousy father.”

Sasuke refrained from telling Naruto that it was his own fault that he was in this situation. He could divorce Hinata. Or better yet, he could have never married her. But it wouldn’t be very helpful to remind Naruto of that. He was efficient enough in beating himself up on his own.

“… If it’s any consolation, I’m probably worse than you.”

“Yeah, but you don’t feel guilt,” Naruto quipped.

Sasuke knew he was just teasing him, but the comment hit a nerve.

“I do, actually,” he said.

Naruto looked apologetic. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean it, not really… I’m just tired…”

“I know you didn’t mean it.” Sasuke didn’t know why, but he felt an urge to explain himself. “You know… You feel bad for not spending enough time with Boruto, but I didn’t see Sarada at all from she was a baby till she was eleven. And it was my own entire fault. I didn’t want to come home. I didn’t want to see her. She was just a reminder of a life that I couldn’t live… of my own mistakes.”

Naruto stared at him. His expression softened.

“It wasn’t your fault,” he said. “You had the mission, and –“

Sasuke snorted. “Now you sound like Sakura. I could burn our house down and she would applaud me for it.”

“Oh… So you notice?”

“That she’s partial to me? It used to annoy me. Then I ignored it for the sake of… I don’t know… For her sake, I guess.”

“I guess love is blind.”

“She uses the mission as an excuse, but at some level she must see that I could have done more. But I didn’t. I could have sent her and Sarada a letter… I could have visited once in a while… Now that I’ve finally had time to spend with Sarada I regret all those years that I spent apart from her. I’m astonished that she even view me as her father anymore.”

He looked away from Naruto, aware that his eyes were getting a little moist.

Naruto reached out and squeezed his hand. Then he moved his chair closer and leant his head against Sasuke’s stomach. He buried his face in Sasuke’s shirt and took a deep breath. Sasuke ran his fingers through Naruto’s bright, though a little matted hair.

“I guess we’re both failures,” he muttered.

“Says the man who realized his dream and became hokage.”

Naruto snorted. “I would give the hokage title away in an instant if it meant I could get my life back. I’m not getting anything important done anyway.”

“You’ve done a lot of important things. You’ve secured Konoha’s future, helped keep the peace in the world, lead the village into an immense technological development…”

“All that doesn’t matter,” Naruto muttered against Sasuke’s shirt. “It would have happened anyway. It was Kakashi who did all the hard work. I’ve just been watching over the things he set in motion. Sometimes I…” Naruto’s voice lowered to a whisper. “I just wish I could go back in time and erase all this.”

Sasuke curled his fingers into the soft hair at the back of Naruto’s neck.

“At least one good thing came out of all this.”

Naruto looked up at him, quizzical.

“Our kids.”

Naruto grinned. He leant his chin against Sasuke’s abdomen. “Yeah, you’re right. Though, I wish they were _our_ kids.”

Sasuke felt a twinge of regret. Could they have been? Was there a future possible for the two of them? Naruto stood. His fingers ghosted across Sasuke’s jaw. He kissed his lips very gently.

“Do you want to stay here with me for a bit? I guess I should take a small break.”

They sat down on the couch that stood off to one side of the room. Naruto leant against Sasuke’s shoulder. They sat in comfortable silence for a while.

“I’ve been wondering,” Naruto murmured. “If I were to leave Hinata… Would you move in with me?”

Sasuke’s hand, which had been caressing the side of Naruto’s neck, stopped its ministrations for half a second.

“Or would you… stay with Sakura?”

“I don’t know… It depends on whether this is a hypothetical question.”

“… I guess it is.”

“You aren’t planning on leaving her anytime soon, are you?”

“I’ve been thinking about it, but…”

Sasuke pushed Naruto’s hair away from his forehead.

“What do you think the village would say? If I lived with you?” Sasuke didn’t particularly care… but he knew Naruto did.

He could feel Naruto slump a bit. “They would be scandalized… to say the least. Their hokage leaves his wife… just to go and live with a man.”

“Not to mention that man is his presumed rival and famously immoral traitor.”

“Don’t say that kind of thing about yourself…”

“Do you think I don’t know what they say about me? Even now, over fifteen years later, people still place themselves between their kids and me when I walk by. Like I’m out of control.”

Naruto mulled that over. “I didn’t know people treated you that way.”

“It’s subtle. They wouldn’t dare be outright hostile. They’re too afraid of me for that.”

“Is there anything I can do to make it better?”

“I’m used to it now.”

“… Is that why you’re so little in Konoha?”

“… There are many reasons why I spend as little time in Konoha as possible. One of them is that I feel unwelcome and like a stranger… Another is that now that I know the truth behind the massacre of my clan I feel even more like an outcast… like I was never welcome here in the first place. I was just a… curiosity because of my kekke genkai.”

He gently thread his fingers through Naruto’s hair, massaging his scalp.

Naruto sighed.

“I’m sorry that I’ve been unable to push through a pardon from the council,” he whispered. “I would have liked to shout it out to the whole town, but as long as the council remains stubborn I can’t take the chance of going public with it.”

Sasuke knew that the truth about the Uchiha massacre had the potential to destroy the credibility of the hokage. It was a delicate matter and Sasuke was aware of that.

“They’ll drop dead from old age before I find out how to expose them,” Naruto murmured.

Sasuke kissed Naruto’s temple. “It doesn’t matter. I’ve long since put it past me. The third is dead, and so is Danzo. The council is just a couple of dried out old twigs. It wouldn’t change much anyway.”

“It would make Itachi look less like a criminal.”

“And me more, then.”

“At least Danzo’s death would seem less unfounded to the public.”

“I don't care about that. It doesn't matter anymore."

Naruto sighed. Sasuke expected him not to drop it, but he did. They sat together in silence for a long while, just enjoying each other’s company until Naruto had to go back to work. Sasuke kept him company for a while, until it got too late and he couldn't put off going home any longer.

 

\-----

 

Hinata followed Naruto to the door when he left the next morning.

“Will you be home in time for dinner today? I have invited some guests.”

Naruto looked up from the shoes he had been putting on. “Guests? Who?”

“Sakura, Sasuke and Sarada.”

Naruto’s fingers stiffened around the supple leather of his shoes. He slowly pulled them on, his brain whirring with this new information.

“Sure, I’ll try to be precise. I don’t think I’ll have that much work to do today, I got a lot done yesterday.”

He looked away from Hinata as he thought about how he’d spent the evening in Sasuke’s arms, and remembered he familiar smell of him and the surprising gentleness of his fingers as they carded through his hair. He swallowed and burrowed the shame he felt at the things he'd done without his wife knowing.

“Bye!” He said and left without looking at her.

 

\-----

 

“I ran into Hinata today,” Sakura said.

Sasuke stopped dead in the doorway to the kitchen. Sakura was busy unpacking the groceries and didn’t notice his reaction.

“She wanted us to come over for dinner,” Sakura continued.

Sasuke swallowed a groan. 

“And I said yes!” Sakura practically beamed. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen her and Naruto, and their kids… I hardly know them at all. It would be nice if we tried to be a bit closer, don’t you think?”

She turned around and leant against the counter.

“I mean, we were pretty close when we were younger… At least me and Naruto…” She trailed off and got a slightly sad look on her face.

Sasuke looked away and went over to help her put away the food. He grabbed a plastic bag and opened the fridge.

“You guys were close?” He said.

“Yeah… But not, uh… Nothing romantic!” She waved her hands and let out a sheepish laugh. “We were just very close friends.”

Sasuke mulled that over. Sakura always focused solely on him so he had no idea how her dynamic with Naruto was other than that she liked to yell at him and hit him. He had known that they were friends, of course, but he had not considered them close.

“He had a crush on you, didn’t he?”

Sasuke realized that there were a lot of things he’d forgotten over the years. Suddenly a barrage of memories from their genin days came back.

“You never considered him?”

“No, I’ve always loved you,” Sakura said and blushed. “You only.”

Sasuke closed the fridge door. “Why?”

“Why?” She looked puzzled. “I… These things… It’s not like I could control it. I just… I just love you.”

The idea of unconditional love was flattering but he found that he wanted a reason. He had never heard her say exactly why she loved him. What had made her fall for him? Seeing as her love had kept strong through all these years, he guessed she’d gotten over her initial infatuation. But she failed to explain how.

He didn’t push the matter. It wasn’t a conversation he felt up to having, especially since he knew that he would get little out of her. Sakura turned around to put away some groceries in the cabinet and Sasuke’s eyes landed on the Uchiha clan symbol that was emblazoned proudly between her shoulder blades.

Somehow it made him sad rather than proud. He turned away from her and left the room.

 

\------

 

Naruto almost forgot about the dinner. Around five o’clock he looked up from his work and wondered how time could fly so fast. Then he remembered that they would have guests for dinner and stood in a rush.

Shikamaru, who had been standing by the desk, sorting through some papers, gave him a funny look.

“I need to go.”

Shikamaru looked at the clock. “Wow… I think that’s the first time in all the years we’ve been working together that you’re leaving on time.”

“I hope it’s all right…”

“Of course.” Shikamaru waved him off. “I’ve got this. It’s about time I worked some overtime too.”

“Thanks.”

When he got home, he could hear Sakura’s laughter already before he opened the door. He felt a buzz of elated excitement rise in his chest. If Sakura was there then Sasuke were too… He opened the door and hurried to kick of his shoes. Then he remembered that Hinata didn’t like clutter and picked the shoes up and placed them neatly next to the others. Then he hurried towards the kitchen where he could hear the voices coming from. Hinata looked up the second he entered the room.

“You made it!” She hurried over and placed herself expectantly in front of him. She never initiated kisses. Naruto was surprised she even hinted about it in the presence of others, but he indulged her despite the fact that he could feel Sasuke’s gaze boring hotly into his back.

He pecked her quickly. Sakura came over to give him a hug. Naruto looked around, seeking out Sasuke. He was standing to his left in the archway to the living room, casually leaned against the doorway. Naruto smiled when their eyes met. The second he knew he was there it was like everything settled inside him.

“You’re in a good mood,” Hinata said softly while their guests got seated around the table.

“Yeah…” Naruto kissed her temple. “I guess getting off work early does me good.”

He chose to sit next to Sasuke and scooted his chair a little closer to him. When he let his legs fall open his knee just barely touched Sasuke’s. Sasuke moved his leg a little closer so that the contact was constant. Naruto hadn’t felt this content in years. He talked easily and laughed a lot. It was overall a very nice evening. Hinata was happy too, and Sakura seemed to also be in a good mood. The kids got along well, despite the fact that Sarada seemed a bit exasperated with Boruto. She seemed to love Himawari, though.

Naruto made sure to ‘accidentally’ touch Sasuke’s hand each time he sent him something. It came to a point where he waited for something to come close to Sasuke before asking for it. He itched to place his hand on Sasuke’s thigh, but knew better than to try it.

He wanted that night to last forever. He managed to convince Sakura to stay for dessert, despite the fact that she was eager to get home and go to bed. She had to go to work the next day. Sarada was ecstatic about getting to stay up a little later, and so was Boruto. Hinata put a very dissatisfied Himawari to bed and came and joined them in the living room.

Naruto felt like a long lost family was finally gathered. The only problem was that he was married to the wrong person. He ached to touch Sasuke somehow, but it was impossible to do it without being seen.

While Sakura and Hinata were deeply engrossed in conversation, and Boruto was trying to show Sarada some of his video games, Naruto went out onto the patio. A little after Sasuke followed him outside into the darkness. They moved away from the light from the door and stopped at the edge of the patio. Naruto turned to make sure no one could see them. Then he faced Sasuke and cupped his cheeks with his hands. He leant in and gave him a soft kiss. Then he pressed their foreheads together.

They didn’t need to speak to know that they were both feeling the same way. An immense longing combined with an ocean of guilt and grief. Naruto kissed Sasuke again. He could feel Sasuke’s longing in the way he pressed into the kiss. The desire mounted and the kiss got more frenzied, but there was also a dread waiting right under the surface, growing bigger and still pushed down harder the more time that passed.

Naruto knew he should pull away, but he couldn’t. He knew someone could notice them any second… He had no idea how well the darkness hid them. But the desire thrummed through his body and took over his mind. He clutched Sasuke’s arms, then he pressed his palm to the back of Sasuke’s neck. Sasuke’s arm curled around Naruto’s waist and pulled him closer.

“Dad.”

They pulled apart faster than the beat of a heart.

“Dad?”

Sasuke had his back to the door, but he didn’t turn fully to his daughter when he spoke.

“What is it, Sarada?” He said as calmly as though nothing had happened.

“Mom says we’re leaving.”

Sarada’s voice was even and normal. She hadn’t seen.

Naruto released the softest sight of relief.

“I’ll be with you in a sec.”

Sarada left, but Sasuke didn’t move. Naruto put a hand on his waist and squeezed gently.

After Sasuke left, Naruto felt completely empty. He took a long shower and just hoped that Hinata would have fallen asleep by the time he went to bed.

 

 


	6. Alone

 

It had been a week since the dinner-party and Naruto was about to go nuts. He was desperate to see Sasuke again. Alone. But it was difficult to get ahold of him without Sakura butting in.

On top of that, his life felt like it was suffocating him. The second he sat down in his office it felt like the walls were caving in on him, but he still worked until late at night because he knew that going home would be no better.

Finally he decided he couldn’t go on like this any longer and sent Sasuke a message. Sasuke arrived ten minutes later. Naruto walked right over to him the second he closed the door behind himself and before he could ask what Naruto wanted he’d caught his mouth in a hungry kiss.

Sasuke tensed at first but then he relaxed into Naruto’s arms and reciprocated the kiss. Naruto started kissing down his neck, impatiently opening his shirt so he could get to his chest.

“Whoa!” Sasuke pushed Naruto away.

“What?” Naruto said testily. He pulled Sasuke closer again.

“Anyone could walk in on us.”

“They’ll knock first.”

Naruto returned his attention to Sasuke’s neck. He sucked hard and Sasuke shoved him again.

“Sakura will notice,” he said when Naruto gave him an affronted look.

“She sees you naked?”

“I don’t need to be naked for her to see this.” Sasuke rubbed the side of his neck.

“See, your shirt will cover it,” Naruto said, and pulled the collar of his shirt up to prove his point. Then he leant in and started kissing down along Sasuke’s chest. He got to his knees and fumbled with the button of Sasuke’s pants.

“Stop, Naruto. We can’t do this here,” Sasuke said.

“I’ve missed you,” Naruto said and stared up at Sasuke. “Haven’t you missed me?”

Sasuke grabbed Naruto’s arm and pulled him to his feet. “Of course I have.”

“Then why didn’t you come to see me?”

“Why didn’t _you_ come to see me?”

“I can’t exactly walk up to your house and ask Sakura if she can give us some time alone so we can fuck.”

“Well, I can’t exactly keep coming here and disturb you while you’re working, making myself and you an easy target for evil tongues.”

They stared at each other, both at stalemate.

“Then what should we do?” Naruto asked.

“I don’t know.”

Naruto averted his eyes first.

“I get it,” he said. “It isn’t smart to keep meeting in public. Especially not when... When things are the way they are.”

He turned away from Sasuke and walked slowly back to his desk.

“But…” He stopped and looked at Sasuke. “What if we met somewhere more private?”

“Where would that be? Everyone knows you on sight.”

Naruto shrugged. “I think I know of a place…”

 

\------

 

Sasuke looked up at the old, run down house. Then he looked at Naruto.

“Wow… Really? Is this how you usually impress your dates?”

Naruto shrugged. “I haven’t really been on that many dates. It looks okay inside and besides I thought maybe we could fix it?”

Sasuke looked at the house again. It was big and slightly hidden in a thick of threes. It was secluded from the rest of the town and situated on top of a small hill with a nice view towards the forest in the distance.

He nodded.

“Fine, show me how it looks inside.”

As Naruto had said, the house looked slightly better on the inside. But only slightly. One of the upstairs rooms had a huge hole in the roof, and some creature was apparently nesting in there. As they’d entered the room something small and dark had darted in under a pile of rubble, and when they came too close it hissed. The other bedroom had fared better and after throwing out some of the rubble and sweeping the floor, it was sort of livable, at least for one night. There was a fireplace on one wall and Sasuke made a fire out of some of the rubble. Naruto had sealed a futon into a scroll and now he rolled it out on the floor and sprawled out on it.

“I’m so goddamned tired,” he muttered.

“Do you want to sleep?”

Naruto leant over and pulled Sasuke closer. “No way.”

Now that the room was warmer, shedding clothes wasn’t much of a problem. They snuck under the duvet and huddled close. They kissed languidly and mapped out each other’s bodies with a gentle curiosity that slowly got more urgent.

Naruto’s fingers circled Sasuke’s asshole. He loosened him with gentle fingers. Sasuke pressed his nose against his throat.

“Is it good for you?” Naruto asked.

“Why do you think I’m agreeing to it?”

“But you don’t make much sound, ya know? And…”

“… And?”

“Well… To be honest, it doesn’t look so damn good.”

“It is.”

Sasuke watched Naruto’s eyelashes fan over his sky blue eyes. He looked gorgeous with the flickering light from the fireplace hitting his golden hair. He almost looked ten years younger.

“Do you want to try?” Sasuke asked.

“Try bottoming?”

Sasuke nodded.

“Uhh…”

“It’s good, I promise.”

“Do _you_ want me to try?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay. Then I’ll do it.”

Naruto rolled over onto his back and watched Sasuke expectantly.

“Now?” Sasuke said.

“Yeah?”

Sasuke’s hand shook slightly as he coated his fingers with lube and slid them in between Naruto’s thighs. Naruto parted his legs wide and angled his hips up. He watched Sasuke without a shadow of worry.

“It might sting a bit,” Sasuke warned.

In the sparse light it was difficult to see exactly what he was doing so he had to feel his way to Naruto’s asshole. He applied pressure and slipped in easily. Naruto didn’t seem bothered in the least. Sasuke wanted to find his prostate before he pushed in more fingers, but Naruto didn’t react much to any of his prodding.

“Wow, this feels weird,” was all he said.

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No… Keep going.”

Sasuke decided he might as well just try two fingers. He watched Naruto’s face and noticed his small frown. Naruto wriggled his hips as though in discomfort.

“Stings,” he murmured.

Sasuke was as gentle as possible. To his surprise it didn’t take long for him to adjust. The third finger slipped in without much prodding and Naruto seemed to finally feel more than just discomfort and curiosity. He frowned and watched Sasuke’s hand with unfocused eyes and parted lips.

“Press harder,” he murmured.

Sasuke did as he said. The pinch of Naruto’s brows deepened. “Oh…”

His legs seemed to fall open of their own volition, and he started moving his hips in turn with Sasuke’s prodding fingers. Sasuke slowly increased the pressure. Naruto just seemed to like it more and more. He threw his head back and pressed his whole lower body up into Sasuke’s palm as though he couldn’t get enough.

Sasuke was both amazed and incredibly turned on. His dick was so hard it was a bit painful. He wished he had more than one hand so that he could relieve the pressure a bit. He was also a little miffed at the fact that Naruto needed almost no preparation before he was like this… He seemed to only feel the pleasurable part of the stretching.

Sasuke added a fourth finger only to see if Naruto would like that too.

At first he sat up slightly, watching Sasuke again. And then he suddenly reached out and grabbed Sasuke’s wrist. Sasuke thought he wanted him to stop, but he just caressed his hand. Then his fingers brushed over his own hole, stretched around Sasuke’s fingers, and he closed his eyes briefly.

He caressed Sasuke’s cheek and urged him down for a kiss. He pressed himself eagerly down on Sasuke’s fingers and groaned into the kiss. Sasuke crawled over him and deepened the kiss. The urgency he felt must have translated through his sloppy kisses.

“Sasuke,” Naruto said. “You can…”

He trailed off, but Sasuke got what he meant. He didn’t waste a second pulling on a condom. Without Sasuke having to say anything, Naruto supported his left shoulder so that he could move into place easier. It was stunning to watch how Naruto lost it. He had been so in-control when he was on top, but now he just closed his eyes, his face lax, and his neck slightly arched, relying on Sasuke to do the job. His voice hitched wetly when Sasuke thrust in just right.

“Ohh, it’s so good,” he murmured. “Sas’ke… so good…”

Sasuke kissed the arch of Naruto’s neck harshly and burrowed his nose against the warm skin. He thrust in as deep as he could and Naruto groaned in delight. He held himself back and waited a moment, desperately trying to catch his breath as Naruto clenched around him.

“Was’ it?” Naruto murmured. “Don’t stop. Is’ good.”

Sasuke nodded. “Wait…” He murmured when Naruto squirmed impatiently. “I’m close…” Naruto relaxed. For a while all that could be heard was their heaving breaths. Naruto ran his hands idly up and down Sasuke’s back.

Naruto snaked his hand in between their bodies and started stroking himself. Sasuke lifted himself up more so that Naruto would get more room, and started moving with short, measured thrusts.

Naruto’s breathing got more labored.

“Fuck,” he murmured under his breath, his voice going up a notch. “Fuck…” He was almost whining.

Sasuke stared down at his lax, open mouth and his short, golden locks plastered to his forehead, and knew he wouldn’t last much longer.

“Naruto,” he panted.

“Mmm…”

“I’m… close… I…”

“Cum,” Naruto groaned. He opened his eyes and lifted one hand to Sasuke’s cheek. “Cum for me.”

Sasuke closed his eyes and allowed himself to let go. He was distantly aware that Naruto was watching him intently. It made the orgasm that much stronger. He released an embarrassingly raw, outdrawn groan and then he slumped against Naruto’s shoulder. He curled up in Naruto’s arms and Naruto curled around him and then they dozed off in a warm, sweaty heap.

 

\------

 

Sasuke woke up what could only be a few hours later. The sun was setting and he had the perfect view of the fiery red horizon from his window. He realized he might become happy living there.

Naruto was curled up against his back. At first Sasuke thought he was asleep, but then he started caressing Sasuke’s hip with his thumb. It was nice to know that they didn’t need to hurry to get home. They had told their wives that they were going for a small camping trip and that they’d be away for the night.

At the thought of Sakura, Sasuke felt a twinge of guilt. He turned around so he was facing Naruto and felt awed at the fact that he had him all to himself for the entire night.

Naruto smiled. It wasn’t his usual face-splitting grin. Instead it was a mild, subdued smile… one that was meant for Sasuke only.

“What are you thinking about?” Naruto asked.

Sasuke lowered his lashes. He felt vulnerable in that moment and his instinct was to protect himself. But then he realized that this was a vulnerable moment for the both of them.

“I was thinking of Sakura,” he said.

Immediately some of the contentment left Naruto’s face. He frowned. “Why?”

“… Guilt.”

Naruto wrapped his arms around Sasuke and pulled him closer.

“I know…” he whispered.

Neither of them suggested they should stop what they were doing. Stopping was out of the question at this point.

Naruto started idly playing with Sasuke’s hair.

“Did Sakura ever tell you about our wedding?” Sasuke asked.

Naruto shook his head.

Sasuke stared up at the roof.

“She got pregnant.”

Naruto’s hand stopped moving.

“Is that why you married?”

“Yes.”

“But…” Naruto leant on his elbow and looked down at Sasuke. “Why did you sleep with her?”

Sasuke shook his head. “I don’t know,” he whispered. He had few memories from that time when Sakura travelled with him. Maybe he had tried to block it out. He still couldn’t recall what had happened that had resulted in them ending up in bed together. He remembered having a few nice weeks together with her where they travelled together as friends. But she could be a little too chatty and she had always behaved funnily around him. He could see that she was trying to look her best for his sake.

Maybe he had been too indulgent. Or maybe he’d just been confused. For a large part, he’d felt guilty. One thing he did remember clearly, though, was waking up the day after a festival where he’d had a little too much to drink, naked and in bed together with her. It had been a dreadful feeling. Most probably it was both their faults. Sakura had wanted so badly to attend the festival, Sasuke had finally given in, and then one thing must have lead to another… He honestly couldn’t remember.

He closed his eyes from Naruto’s keen gaze. He burrowed into the warm palm that grazed his cheek.

Naruto kissed his forehead, his lips lingering and his breath fanning over his skin like a caress.

“I love Sakura a lot,” he said. “But what she felt for you… It was almost scary at times. It consumed her. She didn’t have room for anyone else when you were around.”

“Are you… sad that she didn’t reciprocate your feelings?”

Naruto chuckled. “I might have been, once…” He lay down next to Sasuke again. “Hm… I actually don’t remember when I stopped having feelings for her… Our quibbling sort of became the norm.” He chuckled. “I think both of us realized at some point that my lame attempts at flirting were more like a habit than an actual desire to date her.”

He ran his hand over Sasuke’s chest, accidentally grazing a nipple. Sasuke felt a shiver run down his spine.

“Even when she confessed to me, I think she already knew that it was no point. If I had a little more insight at that point, I might have realized that I was in love with you.”

“… She confessed to you?” Sasuke couldn’t keep the astonishment out of his voice.

“Um… She never told you? Shit… Maybe I wasn’t supposed to tell you that…”

“When was this?”

“Uh… You know when… After you joined Akatsuki and… well… Sakura thought that she needed to release me from the promise I made to her about getting you back, so she told me she loved me. But I know her and there was no chance that she suddenly had given up on you just like that. She probably said it in the hopes that I wouldn’t feel so bad if…”

His hand clenched against Sasuke’s chest.

“If I died,” Sasuke said. He was starting to realize when this must have taken place. “She told you that right before she tried to kill me.”

There was no anger in his voice. He had sometimes wondered if it would have been best if she had succeeded that time.

“It was unfair to you,” he told Naruto.

“I knew she didn’t mean it,” Naruto whispered. There was something slightly raw in his voice.

“Maybe that’s the worst part,” Sasuke said.

They didn’t say anything else for a long while. Instead they lay immersed in their own thoughts.

“I resent her a bit,” Sasuke admitted.

Naruto kissed his shoulder.

“Though it’s my fault too…” Sasuke continued. “I should never have agreed to it. I should have stayed true to myself. But I didn’t and now everything is a mess.”

“What happened after you slept together?”

“We pretended like nothing. I was starting to hope that she realized it was a mistake… And then, three months later she told me that she was pregnant.”

“So… She didn’t give you the choice to have a say in it?”

Sasuke shrugged. “She told me she wanted to keep it. But after a while it became apparent that she was afraid to tell her parents, so finally I suggested that we should marry. At that time I really thought we could make it work. I had no one else but you and her, and you were already married. So I thought that over all it was a good match. But I can see now that it was bound to become a disaster. She wanted more from me than I could give her. I just couldn’t love her the way she needed. In the end, the one who suffered the most was Sarada… and I’m not sure if I can forgive myself for that.”

Naruto cupped his chin and kissed his cheek. “You have to stop blaming yourself for things that were out of your control. You both did stupid mistakes… We all have done some really stupid things. I’m no better. I thought I loved Hinata when I married her. I thought it could work out. But it turns out I didn’t know what true love was at all. Maybe if I’d never met you, I could have lived an ordinary, comfortable life with her. But we can’t control these things… we can’t always know beforehand if what we’re doing is the right thing. When I was younger I used to think that following my own road was easy. I knew what I wanted and how to get it and I worked hard for it. Then, at some point I got confused. I was fighting a war inside between what I wanted and what others wanted from me, and I lost because I got too concerned with what others thought of me. My goal turned into my prison.” 

He buried his face against Sasuke’s neck. Sasuke felt his misery in every taut line of his body. He caressed the back of his neck.

“I don’t want to hurt anyone,” Naruto whispered. “But I want to be happy too.”

“There’s nothing wrong in that.”

Naruto laughed drily. “I should just take what I want, you mean?”

“No. But you should take more care of yourself. Allow yourself something that makes you happy.”

“Hmm…” Naruto’s hand wandered down Sasuke’s chest to his stomach. The tips of his fingers grazed Sasuke’s pubes. “Like this?”

Sasuke chuckled. “That too.”

Naruto kissed him. His hand strayed lower, down to Sasuke’s rising erection, and closed around it. He urged Sasuke to turn onto his side so that his back was pressed against Naruto’s chest. Sasuke listened to the sounds of Naruto slickening himself up and relaxed in preparation for the penetration.

Naruto touched him with the tips of his fingers first, before slipping one slick finger inside. He prodded gently until he found the spot he was searching for. Sasuke jutted his ass out and rocked down on Naruto’s finger in time with the gentle thrusts.

He liked the preparation. Naruto seemed to be more precise with his fingers than with his cock, and there was something about being slowly stretched that just took everything up a notch. Even if he didn’t come, the sensation was still wonderful. Naruto had one arm under Sasuke’s neck, and Sasuke nuzzled into his palm. Naruto caressed Sasuke’s cheek while the fingers of his other hand buried deeper into Sasuke’s ass.

Sasuke pushed harder down on them. He was ready for more, and Naruto noticed. He pulled out and shortly after Sasuke felt the bulbous head of his cock press against his entrance. He tried to spread his legs even as he was lying down on his side. Naruto’s cock felt a little too much in the beginning, but as he eased deeper inside the sting of the stretch gave way to the satisfying feeling of being so full. He waited for Naruto to slowly and carefully push all the way in… just as Sasuke liked it. He grabbed Naruto’s hand and kissed his knuckles, then his fingers. He rocked his hips slowly just to properly feel him. He pushed back until he felt his ass connect with Naruto’s hip. Naruto pushed up against him, making him feel his whole length straining against the walls of his insides.

Sasuke blindly reached behind him and grabbed the back of Naruto’s head. He turned his head so he could kiss him. Naruto’s arms circled him and held him tighter. Sasuke started rocking down onto Naruto’s cock, pulling himself only slightly away from him before grounding down again. In the lazy, relaxed state they were in, it felt good to take deep, short thrusts. Naruto fell into rhythm with him, and soon the thrusting and rocking turned frenetic. Sasuke knew Naruto would come fast in this position, but all he wanted was to just hear him come.

Naruto reached down to jerk him off, and came shortly after. He tensed and groaned, and then he pushed deeply into Sasuke as he spilled. He pulled out and attempted to jerk Sasuke off, but Sasuke put a hand on his arm.

“Finger me,” he said.

Naruto didn’t need to be asked twice. He turned Sasuke over onto his back, kissed him deeply, and then he poured some more lube over his fingers and buried four of them deep inside of Sasuke. He curled his fingers expertly, rubbing Sasuke’s sweet spot just right.

He looked so focused as he stared down at what he was doing. Sasuke touched his chin and urged him to kiss him. Naruto finger-fucked him hard until Sasuke arched up and came all over his own stomach. Naruto kept kissing him and rubbing him gently until he’d rode his orgasm out. Then he carefully pulled out and wiped them both down with a corner of the sheet.

When they curled up close, everything else but the two of them and the soft, post-orgasmic buzz was forgotten, and they fell asleep fast.

 

 

 


	7. Making a decision

 

Sakura might seem oblivious, but she was not stupid. She noticed how Sasuke got more and more distant the longer he stayed in Konoha, how his thoughts seemed to be miles away and how he became more and more quiet and introspected.

At first she feared he was unhappy with being stuck in Konoha. He was too stubborn to accept a job from Konoha, the village that had ruined his whole life, so he was just sort of drifting around without a purpose. Sakura could see that it made him unhappy, and every day she wondered if she’d done the right thing when she insisted that he should stay.

But then he would suddenly be in a good mood one day, and she became certain that it had been the right thing to do. She could see how happy it made Sarada to have Sasuke around, and that convinced her that the sacrifice was worth it. She would do anything to make her daughter happy, even risk the happiness of her wayward husband.

He would grow used to it, she thought. It was always worst in the beginning. Sasuke couldn’t stay away from the village forever. He had to come back at some point, so why not start now?

 

\------

 

At night, when Sasuke turned away from her and scooted to the very edge of the bed, she brought forth the memory of the first time they slept together. They had both been slightly buzzed…. Maybe a little drunk, even, but it had brought out a new side in Sasuke. She had always thought that when the time came, she would have to be the one to initiate since Sasuke always had seemed so removed from anything that was even remotely passionate. She’d been okay with that. She’d already accepted that she’d be the one to chase him instead of how she’d hoped it’d be… that he’d finally change his mind and come to her.

As it turned out, Sasuke was full of passion. All that was needed was for someone to break down that wall that he’d built around himself, and Sakura had finally been able to make a small crack in it (with a little help from the alcohol, admittedly…).

He had been gentle and loving and unusually desperate. It had been over far too soon and she got little out of it, but the memory of that time stayed with her even to this day. The only thing that bothered her with that time was that Sasuke had kept his eyes closed the entire time.

 

\------

 

Lately, though, Sasuke had seemed different. He was a bit testy. When she touched him he’d flinch away. He barely spoke to her and when he did it was only to talk about the most necessary things, like who was to buy groceries or fix the leak in the bathroom. Also, he’d started making his own meals, which baffled Sakura. In her family, her mother had always cooked, and so had all the mothers of everyone else she knew. Seldom had she seen the father cook, and it sort of threw her whole image of male and female roles off kilter. It surprised her even more that Sasuke was actually good at it, but then she remembered that he had lived most of his life alone. He’d probably been forced to learn to cook.

In the end, she was grateful he took some of the workload off her. It had been tough juggling home life and work life now that she’d gone back to working fulltime at the hospital.

But the testiness and the new habits were only the beginning. Lately, Sasuke had started finding excuses to leave for a night or two more and more often. She didn’t find it suspicious at first. She was just glad he was doing something else but brood. But as the periods of absence grew more frequent, she started wondering what was actually going on. She reluctantly put together all the pieces, and came to a horrifying realization.

The refusal to touch her, or to be touched… The complete lack of sex-life… The continued absence…

Was he…? Could he be…? Was it possible that…? She felt sick just at the thought. It couldn’t be… This couldn’t be happening to her! Sasuke couldn’t be having an… an… _an affair?!_

The more she thought about it, the more probable it seemed. She couldn’t shake the idea. If things hadn’t become so strange between them, then maybe she would have dared to ask him, but right now she was just too afraid that the answer would be yes…

 

\------

 

Naruto had thought a lot about how he wanted to work closer with Sasuke and how he could share his duty with him without having to send him away from Konoha and without waking the suspicion of the council.

He considered Sasuke the hokage in the shadows. He was Naruto’s best friend and other half. Separately they worked well and they had their own strengths, but together they worked even better. They had proved it many times, both during the war and after it, when Sasuke worked for Naruto from outside of Konoha.

For a long time, Naruto had tried to figure out a way to justify having two hokage’s. The workload for one thing, but all the hokage’s before him had managed that on their own. It would be a huge step to suggest something like that, not to mention that very few trusted Sasuke. There would be a uproar if Naruto appointed him as co-hokage. It was simply out of the question.

But Naruto wanted him by his side. He knew it was the only right thing to do, and he needed him there too.

He knew that Sasuke couldn’t care less. He had never cared about the power, but rather about how he could make the world a better place. But as of now, Sasuke didn’t have much of a position in Konoha, despite the fact that he should’ve had it. The police force had long since been appointed to a different clan so the position that had initially been his was no longer available.

All the clans in Konoha had old traditions that they followed, but Sasuke lacked that. He was floating around without a purpose and without roots, much like Naruto had done before he became the war-hero and the hokage. Naruto knew how much that hurt, but there was little he could do about it. The Uchiha clan had long since been squeezed out of the warmth and into the shadows of forgetfulness. Sasuke was nothing more than a means to get control over a kekke genkai. Naruto would not be part of that, but he knew that the council only viewed him as such. If he could get Sasuke into a higher position, he could regain some of the power to his family name.

As of now, though, Sasuke seemed uninterested in working for Konoha in any way. He would work for Naruto but not for Konoha, which Naruto supposed was the reason he had not been bothered to get back into taking missions.

Naruto rubbed his temples and squeezed his tired eyes shut. He hadn’t noticed that it had gotten dark outside. There was no light on in his office other than the light from his computer screen.

He slumped in his chair. He felt so tired lately. Sometimes he wanted to just stay in bed and sleep for days. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could stand going on like this.

 

\-----

 

It was the third night they snuck off to the house on the hill to see each other. The bathroom in the house was somewhat in order, which was good since they hadn’t had time to get anything done on the house yet. Neither of them had the extra energy to begin on that anyway. It also felt a bit… well, it felt even more wrong to start building a new life when they were still knee-deep in their old life.

When Naruto came out of the shower, he found Sasuke asleep on their futon. He was lying on his right side, his left arm resting atop the sheet. Naruto stopped in the doorway and gazed at his lover. His chest was rising evenly and slowly. His face looked restful. Naruto dried his hair and let the towel drop to the floor. He kneeled next to Sasuke. He didn’t even stir.

While they made love, Naruto seldom thought about Sasuke’s amputated arm, but now old memories came back as fresh as though they were from yesterday. He ran the tips of his fingers over the scarred, puckered skin on Sasuke’s stump. Then he leant down and kissed the scar gently.

Sasuke hadn’t been asleep. He was watching Naruto from underneath his lashes.

“Why did you never get a prosthetic arm?” Naruto asked.

Sasuke hesitated for a long moment before he answered, probably considering whether or not he should tell the whole truth.

“It’s a reminder.”

“Of what?” Naruto asked, although he had a sinking feeling that he already knew.

“Of our fight. Of your sacrifice. And my-“

“It wasn’t a sacrifice,” Naruto murmured.

“It became one.”

Sasuke scooted to the side and Naruto snuck under the sheet.

“It was a choice,” Naruto said as he sidled closer and enveloped Sasuke in his arms. Sasuke didn’t like to snuggle but he allowed it for Naruto’s sake. By the time Naruto was almost asleep, though, Sasuke turned the other way. Naruto snuck closer and placed one hand on his hip over the sheets. He let it remain a few inches between them so that Sasuke wouldn’t feel crowded.

“I’m leaving Sakura,” Sasuke said, suddenly, as Naruto was about to fall asleep again.

Naruto blinked away the sleepiness. Suddenly he felt wide-awake.

“You’re really doing it?”

“I’ve made up my mind. I can’t keep stringing her along anymore. And besides… I think she has noticed that something is different. At this point I’m just delaying the inevitable.”

“Oh… Well… I guess that’s… good…”

Naruto didn’t know what he felt about that. Sakura was a dear friend to him and he didn’t want her to hurt. But on the other hand, he’d basically destined her to heartbreak the second he started this relationship with Sasuke.

“What about you?” Sasuke said.

“Me? Oh, Hinata…” Naruto absently watched his hand caress Sasuke’s hip. It felt like it belonged to someone else. To someone happier, less burdened. Someone who didn’t cheat on his wife. “I…”

Truth was, he didn’t know. He didn’t know what to do, or what to say, or how to even start saying it. He had never had a very open relationship with Hinata. They couldn’t really talk with each other and they didn’t communicate well. Just the thought of telling her he couldn’t be with her anymore… It scared him shitless.

“I’ll tell her,” he said. “Just not yet… I need to… I need to find out how to tell her.”

Sasuke turned around so that he could look Naruto in the eyes. Naruto looked away.

“You’re lying,” Sasuke said. “You don’t want to tell her.”

Damn Sasuke for reading him so easily.

“You’ll have to,” Sasuke said. “Sooner or later you’ll have to tell her.”

Naruto knew that. He just felt more at ease when he knew it would be sometime in the future and not right now.

“When did you become so cowardly?” Sasuke asked.

Naruto glared at him. He punched his shoulder. “I’m no-“

“Maybe you always were,” Sasuke mused. “You just hid it well under all that bravado.”

Naruto leant on his elbow. “I’m not… It’s not cowardice! It’s just…” He paused. Then he felt his heart sink. “Okay… So maybe… Maybe it’s a bit cowardly…” He rubbed his face with one hand. “It’s really fucking cowardly. Fuck… What have I become…?” The last part he murmured mostly to himself.

He looked at Sasuke. “What have we become?”

They were mere shadows of themselves, on hiatus in their own lives. Barely existing, even though they both had gotten what they wanted when they were young. Naruto had become hokage and Sasuke had killed his brother. What would their younger selves have said if they knew how trifle and useless their dreams were? What would they have done if they knew that the goals they fought so hard for were nothing but twisted truths and empty promises?

 

\-----

 

Sakura wanted to pretend like nothing, like she’d done before, but it was impossible not to check Sasuke’s clothes for secret notes or the smell of a foreign perfume when she washed them, or become suspicious of any correspondence he received. Mostly, it was from the hokage, though. Sasuke didn’t seem to spend much time with anyone else but Naruto, as far as Sakura could tell, and that was a small relief.

She considered asking Naruto if he knew anything about Sasuke seeing someone else, but she knew that he’d protect Sasuke at all costs.

Outwardly she pretended everything was fine. When she talked with Ino or the other girls, she made sure to never mention how much she struggled in her own marriage. Watching her friends being content and happy with their partners didn’t lessen the burden she felt. And yet, she smiled bravely and held her head high. She couldn’t show any weakness because it was vital that everyone thought she was happy. She had gotten her dream man. She had been so proud when she saw the envy in Ino and the other girl’s eyes. If she told them that everything was a sham… the humiliation would be unbearable.

At night, when Sasuke wasn’t home, she cried herself to sleep. Sometimes she even cursed that first time they slept together. She cursed herself for being so blinded by her heedless infatuation for him that she didn’t consider the fact that they might not be compatible at all. She cursed herself for never truly getting to know him, for never being able to penetrate that thick wall of indifference that he protected himself with.

But she couldn’t give up on him. Never, ever would she admit that she’d been mistaken. That she’d been blinded by her own, childish infatuation. He was hers now, and she meant to keep him.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is how I view Sakura's love. In my opinion it's her biggest character flaw, but sadly it's also her most defining character trait :/


	8. Upheaval - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the delay! All chapters up till this one have been pre-written, so that's why I've been so good at staying to a schedule until now. The story is drawing to a close. I'm guessing it will be around ten chapters. I'm not sure how my schedule will be from now on, but I'll try to keep to weekly or biweekly updates. Also, if you want to check out more of my stuff, I have a tumblr (caninekitten.tumblr.com) where I post drawings and some one-shots that I haven't posted here.

 

Sasuke wetted his lips. This was his chance. Sarada had left on a mission with her team and Sakura was making ready for work. He should tell her now. The sooner the better. But then he realized it might be a bad idea to drop this kind of revelation on her just before she went to work. She probably wouldn’t take it well. It would ruin her whole day…

Sakura put her lunch in her purse and grabbed the house keys. She smiled shyly at Sasuke who stood in the doorway.

“Bye,” she said. She lingered like she always did, hoping he’d kiss her.

He turned away.

 

\------

 

Sasuke came home at three o’clock after having trained almost the entire day. He reckoned it’d be another two hours before Sakura was home. She always worked overtime. He took a shower. When he got out he heard the doorbell chime. Sarada was away on a two-day mission, and he’d seen Sakura bring her keys that morning, so it wasn’t either of them.

He opened the door and found Naruto on the other side. He stepped aside.

“Come in.”

“I’m just bringing this,” Naruto said, showing Sasuke a few boxes of Tupperware. “Sakura left them after the dinner party.”

He walked inside.

“Is Sakura home?”

“No. She’s working and Sarada is on a mission.”

Naruto took of his shoes. Sasuke took the boxes and put them in the kitchen.

“… Do you want anything?”

He wasn’t used to entertaining people, but he guessed asking if they wanted refreshments were common decency.

“No thanks, I really… I was just dropping by.”

Naruto looked around the kitchen as though checking if it really was no one else there.

Sasuke put on a kettle of water nevertheless. He leant against the counter and studied Naruto. He looked tired. He had dark bags under his eyes and his skin was more pale than usual. His hair was tousled, like he’d run his hands through it countless times.

“You could need some down time. Are you going back to work?”

Naruto shook his head. “No, I’m done for the day.”

He gave Sasuke a long, searching look. He seemed to take in his whole body slowly, his eyes raking from Sasuke’s face to his torso and down to his thighs. Sasuke was only wearing loose pants and an open shirt. He realized his hair was still wet and dripping on the shirt and down his chest.

Naruto’s eyes had grown dark with desire. Sasuke shrugged off his shirt and let it drop to the floor. He leant back against the counter, his hand on the countertop.

“What are you doing?” Naruto asked. His eyes stayed on Sasuke’s face with visible effort.

“What does it look like I’m doing?”

Naruto shook his head slowly. “Sakura could be home any minute.”

“She’s seldom home before six, and never before five.”

Naruto watched Sasuke intently as he moved towards him and almost teasingly pulled open his jacket.

“But… she could…”

Sasuke placed a kiss on his lips. Naruto closed his eyes.

“What if she…?” he protested weakly.

Sasuke trailed feathery kisses down along Naruto’s neck. Naruto sighed.

Sasuke nudged him towards the stairs.

“No,” Naruto protested again. “Not on the bed!”

“What do you suggest, then? The couch?”

Naruto pursed his lips but dropped the protests and let Sasuke lead him upstairs. He directed them towards his and Sakura’s room. The bed was made with pink throw pillows and a flowery blanket over the sheets. Sasuke took a certain pleasure in throwing Naruto into all the pinkness, upsetting the neat, feminine touch.

He pressed Naruto down on the bed and kissed him hard. Naruto groaned. He ran both hands over Sasuke’s chest, his calloused fingertips dragging across Sasuke’s nipples.

“Fuck it,” he murmured and threw Sasuke down on the bed before rolling over him.

Then he pulled a small scroll from the pocket of his pants. It was the same that he carried for when they rendezvoused at the old house on the hill.

“I thought we’d meet up tonight,” Naruto said as answer to Sasuke’s curious glance.

He extracted lube and condoms from the scroll.

Sasuke got lost in the sensation of the stretching as Naruto fingered him. He was a bit rougher than usual, a bit impatient. Sasuke kicked his pants the rest of the way off, and wrapped his legs around Naruto’s waist. He groaned when Naruto’s cock pushed into him. The feeling of being stretched almost too wide was amazing. Naruto relaxed for a bit, letting him get used to the intrusion. He had been sloppy with the preparation and he probably felt how tight Sasuke was. He kissed Sasuke gently as an apology, but he hadn’t needed to. Sasuke wanted Naruto to move. He wanted him to fuck him as hard as he could. He just didn’t know how to express that without sounding needy.

He wrapped his legs tighter around Naruto and rocked his hips. Naruto groaned and fell into rhythm with him. A gentle, shallow rhythm at first, but Sasuke wouldn’t have it. He bit the side of Naruto’s neck, and when he flinched he kissed the spot. It worked in getting Naruto excited. He pushed deeper into Sasuke.

“Yes,” Sasuke groaned against Naruto’s neck. He clenched his legs around Naruto’s waist. “Ah… yes…”

Naruto kissed and sucked on Sasuke’s neck while his hips rocked harder and harder, his thrusts becoming deeper and deeper. Sasuke’s fingers dug into the back of Naruto’s jacket, clawing at the fabric.

Naruto seemed to take care to push in at the right angle. His thrusts were becoming more precise. Each time he rolled his hips down, Sasuke moaned. With almost every thrust the entire length of Naruto’s cock buried into him, pressing against his prostate. Naruto had a small wrinkle on his forehead, between his eyebrows, and looked deeply concentrated. When he felt Sasuke’s gaze on him, he met it and smiled.

Sasuke panted into the soft kiss that was placed on his lips. He moaned softly as Naruto pushed into him just at the same moment. He pressed his hand to Naruto’s cheek. He didn’t want him to look away. He wanted to watch him as they came undone. He felt his orgasm approach slowly and ominously, like a tidal wave.

He noted the way Naruto pressed his eyes closed and bit his teeth together, as though he was keeping himself in check. He changed the rhythm of his thrusts, and Sasuke felt his orgasm recede a bit before it slowly built up again.

He kissed Naruto and pressed their foreheads together.

“Faster,” he panted.

Naruto shook his head.

Sasuke groaned in frustration. He tensed his legs and brought Naruto down closer, rocked down on him so that he was entirely buried within him.

“Fuck me harder,” he growled into Naruto’s ear.

Naruto whimpered and pressed closer to Sasuke. He thrust his hips deeply and swiftly. Sasuke let his head drop back and groaned.

“Oh,” he dug his fingers into Naruto’s hair. “Ooohhh…”

Naruto’s arms shook from exertion. His breathing was labored.

“I-I’m…” he whimpered.

Sasuke knew he was about to come. He didn’t care.

“Harder,” he groaned as he kissed down along Naruto’s cheek. His breath hitched as Naruto followed his command. “Y-yes… ahhh…”

He brought his knees up until he was almost curled around Naruto. He tipped his head back, his mouth open in a wordless moan. Oh, yes… He was so close… so close…

“Naruto!”

They both jolted at the sharp yell.

Naruto panted harshly into Sasuke’s ear. His movements stopped halfway, but not entirely. He was probably as confused as Sasuke for the first half second. Then it hit them… It was Sakura’s voice.

Somehow, she had come into the room without either of them noticing. The shock on Naruto’s face mirrored Sasuke’s own dread. Sakura was never home this early. She always worked overtime, and even if she hadn’t she was _still_ home too early.

Naruto rolled off Sasuke. They both scrambled for something to cover their nakedness with. Sakura stood halfway into the room, in her nurse uniform, her hands fisted. Her face was twisted into a grimace of anger and disbelief.

She was looking at Naruto when she said, “How could you? You, of all people?”

Sasuke realized she was going to let her anger out on Naruto, like she always did.

“I trusted you!” She yelled.

Naruto had managed to pull up his pants and was standing on the other side of the bed from her, looking like a wild animal trapped in a corner.

“Get out,” she growled.

He inched along the wall. “Sakura… Please, I didn’t mean for this to happen… I…”

“Shut up!” Sakura screamed. She was crying now.

Sasuke wished he knew where his pants had ended up. As it were, he only had the sheet to cover himself with.

“I - I knew something was going on,” Sakura spluttered. “I knew it! But I’d never… never… not in a million years believe it was you!”

She suddenly launched herself at Naruto, and the moron did nothing to stop her. She slapped him, luckily surprisingly tame for her, and then she grabbed the lapels of Naruto’s jacket and shook him.

Sasuke realized that Naruto wasn’t going to defend himself. He stood, nakedness be damned, and stepped between them. He shoved Sakura aside, but she didn’t let go of Naruto. Now her attention was diverted to him, and her face went from dark with anger to a crushing hurt that hit Sasuke harder in the gut than any punch could do.

She shoved Naruto away.

“Why?” She said. Her eyes flickered from Naruto, who was slumped against the wall, to Sasuke, and back again. “Why?!” Her voice was filled with wrenching pain. “Why are you doing this? I-is it divine punishment for… for, I don’t know…” she shook her head, her voice hitching in her throat. “For being a girl? For never living up to the same greatness as you two did? Huh?” The anger was coming back. “Are you punishing me for something?!” She screamed.

Naruto flinched.

“One would think,” she said bitterly, “That taking care of your child alone for eleven years would be enough. That putting up with your absence would be enough. T-that making up excuses for you and protecting you against gossip, and never uttering a word of complaint would be enough!!”

“You say it like I owe you something,” Sasuke said through clenched teeth.

He was done with feeling guilty; with hiding; with making do with the scraps because he thought that was all he deserved. He was just done.

“Was that why you did it?” He pushed. “Was that why you took care of our daughter alone without complaining? Was that why you put on a smile and pretended you were fine when you weren’t? Because you thought it’d make me owe you something?”

Sakura looked confused and hurt.

“You paid a high price for your happiness,” Sasuke said, ignoring the twinge of remorse he felt at seeing her so broken and hurt. “You can’t tell me I owe you anything anymore. I’m done with it.” He paused. Then he added, just to drive it home, “I’m leaving you.”

That seemed to be the last drop for Sakura. Her face crumbled. She stared at him in complete astonishment.

“No,” she said. “No, you can’t…” Her lip quivered. “Please, Sasuke! You can’t leave me! Please!”

Sasuke took a step back when she reached out for him. He didn’t understand what had happened. One second she was full of righteous anger, power and ominous danger. The next she was a sobbing wreck. He realized it was that side of Sakura that he couldn’t stand. The needy, helpless, pushy side that came forth far too often when she was around him.

“You can’t leave me!” Sakura wailed. “Y-you can’t! What am I supposed to do? What am I supposed to say to… Think of Sarada!” Some of her anger came back. “Think of what you’re doing to this family!”

“Can’t you see that I’ve already ruined this family!” Sasuke yelled. “It was broken even before we could call ourselves a family! We built it on nothing! Do you honestly not see that?”

He noticed a small movement to his right, and realized that Naruto was still there, trapped between them and the door. He reached out and touched his arm.

“Don’t go,” he said.

He received a slap to his face that made his ears ring. He turned to a red-faced and livid Sakura. Tears were collecting in the corners of her eyes even as she hissed, “How dare you belittle our efforts? MY efforts? I worked really hard to make this family work!”

“You! Always you!”

“Ha! That’s rich. How can you complain about how it’s always about me, when it’s always been about you?”

“No,” Sasuke said, very slowly. “No. You made it about me. You’ve always expected certain things from me, things I never asked for. I never wanted it. What am I to you, really?”

“You’re the love of my life,” Sakura whispered. “You’re everything to me.”

Sasuke shook his head. He took one step away from her. He wished he had something to cover himself with. He spotted his pants on the floor and slipped them on.

Sakura turned to Naruto.

“Why are you still here?” she said very lowly. “Go out.” When Naruto didn’t move immediately, she yelled, “Get out! Now! I don’t want to see you here ever again!”

Naruto hurried past her, obviously afraid he’d get his scull bashed in if he lingered. He turned when he reached the door, and looked at Sasuke. His worried look told him he wondered if he’d be all right. Sasuke nodded, and Naruto slipped out the door.

Sakura placed her hands over her face after Naruto left. Her shoulders were shaking. She sagged down to the floor.

“I thought you loved me,” she sobbed. “You said you loved me! Why would you do this? Why?” She stared up at him. Her green eyes were wide and fearful. Sasuke had to look away.

“I can’t loose you…” she whimpered. “After I married you, I… I felt whole for the first time. I felt like I had accomplished something…”

Sasuke felt a lump of ice settle in his stomach.

_Accomplished something?_

Sakura continued talking without looking at him.

“Finally I was someone… I showed everyone what I was capable of. That I wasn’t just that shy, insecure girl anymore. Everyone was so jealous of me when I married you.”

She sniffed. “My life finally felt perfect.”

Sasuke felt sick. “You married me just because you wanted to _prove_ something?”

“No, of course not!” She protested fiercely. “You know I love you! I have always loved you! How can you question that? Besides, it’s _you_ who have betrayed my trust! How can you stand there and accuse _me_?”

Sasuke shook his head. It doesn’t matter, he thought. It doesn’t matter anymore.

He opened the closet and put the few clothes he had into a duffel bag.

“What are you doing?” Sakura said.

“I said I’m leaving.”

“Where will you go? You can’t go to _him_ ,” she nearly spat the last word.

“I have a place I can stay.”

Sakura scrambled to her feet and stopped Sasuke from passing her.

“Don’t go,” she said. “Please. I beg you.”

“You want me to stay?” Sasuke said. “Even after you caught me cheating on you?”

“We can make it work! I…”

Sasuke grabbed her shoulder and looked her deep into the eyes. “Don’t you get it? I’m gay! I was never interested in you! We could never make it work.”

Her mouth fell open. She fought to close it. “Surely… surely whatever you had with Naruto, it was just… desire… you can’t be… we’ve lived together for eleven years! Don’t you think I’d notice if you were gay?”

He could see that she didn’t believe her own words even as she was saying them.

“You can’t be!” She insisted. “You slept with me! You… you…”

“I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve slept with you,” Sasuke said. “And they were all out of necessity.”  
He turned away from her, but she held his arm.

“Not the first time,” she said. “The first time you even held me. I remember it so well. You held me, and you hugged me, and you told me I was beautiful.”

Her voice trailed off. She finally seemed to realize that it had been the first and the last time he did that.

“I was so drunk I don’t even remember it,” Sasuke said softly. He didn’t want his words to hurt her, but he knew they would. And he knew she needed to hear it. “I married you because I didn’t want our child to grow up without a family. But… in the end I guess it didn’t matter.”

He touched Sakura’s shoulder. “I’m sorry I was never there. I think you would have been better off without me.”

 

\------

 

Sakura felt numb. She stood in the middle of their room… her room… alone for a long while. She hugged herself. The image of Sasuke and Naruto embraced on their… her bed was burned into her memory. She had never… never seen Sasuke like that before. She knew now that the door to his heart that she thought she’d manage to open had only been slightly ajar.

The one who had managed to open it… not only open it, but slam it wide open… was not her but Naruto. Of course. When it came to Sasuke it was always Naruto. Naruto who pushed him, who taunted him, who made him react and feel things…

It made her so angry. She had always done her best to become their equal, but no matter what she did they always put her on the sideline. Even when it came to love. It was not fair. Was she destined to never get anything but grief?

Her gaze landed on the rumpled bed, and suddenly she felt so livid she feared she’d explode. The fact that they had been having an affair was one thing, but that they’d been so bold, so uncaring, as to engage in it right there, right on the bed that represented so many lonely nights to Sakura… It was unbearable.

In a fit of rage, she grabbed the sheets and the blankets and the frilly covers and pulled them off the bed. She bunched them up and shoved them out the window. They were caught by the wind as they fell, and were propelled into the forest like monstrous, white bats.

She clenched the window frame until the wood gave in under her fingers with a loud, pained groan. Warm tears streamed down her face. She didn’t want to cry, but it kept flowing until she felt the salt seep into her mouth. She slumped to the floor and curled up around herself, trying to protect what little was left.

 

\------

 

Sasuke wasn’t sure what home Naruto had gone back to. Could their crumbling shack even be called a home? Either way, he couldn’t show up at his family’s place and demand to talk to him. Not right now. He’d ruined one family already. He didn’t need to spur arguments in a second one the very same night.

He had barely been able to remember what he needed to take with him when he left. He had plucked with him the things that were his that he saw. He lingered for a long moment in front of the framed photos. He wanted to bring a picture of Sarada, but it felt wrong to take with him something that never had belonged to him. So he took the one of him with team taka instead, the one that was still in a broken frame. Their family photo he gladly left. He shuddered just from looking at his own emotionless mask in it.

The old, rickety house seemed empty when he reached it. There were no lights on inside. He closed the door behind him. The floor in the hall groaned under his weight. The whole house seemed to threaten to fall apart any second. He slumped against the door.

What had he done?

Was it even possible to start afresh after this? Did he really know what he had relinquished? And how could he even hope to make this house… this… this useless shack into a home?

Would he ever see his daughter again?

The doubt rolled in over him like a menacing shadow.

Then he heard footsteps upstairs. Naruto came down the stairs. He looked brittle. He hadn’t had the time, or the will, to straighten his clothes yet. His jacket was still open. He stopped at the last step.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

Sasuke dropped everything he was holding. He pulled Naruto into his arms and held him tight.

“ _You_ don’t need to say that,” he murmured against Naruto’s ear. “I’m the one who should apologize. I should never have convinced you to sleep with me in that house. It was idiocy. And I shouldn’t have dragged you into my conflict.”

Naruto pulled away. “That’s not that I’m apologizing for.”

He looked more tired than Sasuke had ever seen him before. Not even when he was pulling his second all-nighter in the office, looking like he hadn’t slept for weeks, with eyes bloodshot from having studied documents and files for hours on end, he’d never looked as tired as this. He looked bone-weary. Like he couldn’t do as much as lift a hand even if someone came and threatened his life in that instant.

“I’m sorry I’ve been such a coward,” Naruto said. “Today I saw how much we hurt those around us with what we’re doing, and I can’t believe that I’ve let this go on for so long.”

Sasuke felt his heart drop, stone cold, into his stomach. He studied Naruto’s face for any hints to what he meant. His fingers clenched around Naruto’s underarm.

Naruto grabbed his hand and held it between his own warm ones.

“I’ve decided that I’m going to stop this here.”

Sasuke realized this was goodbye. Naruto had seen how ugly separation could get and he didn’t want to go through the same thing with Hinata. In one night, Sasuke had lost both his family and the love of his life. He felt sick all of a sudden.

“I’m telling her tomorrow,” he heard Naruto say.

“What?” He blinked.

Naruto looked at him curiously. “I said that I’m telling Hinata tomorrow. I’m leaving her.”

Sasuke felt dizzy with relief. He let out a tense sigh.

“Hey, what is it?” Naruto asked. “Did you think I’d leave you?”

Sasuke held him tight. “Don’t scare me like that again.”

Naruto rubbed his back. “Goddammit, what do you take me for? Well, I guess that’s what I get for being such a useless coward. You were right, Sasuke. I’ve been thinking of what you said and it’s true. I lost a part of myself at some point and didn’t even realize it until now.”

They stood in each other’s arms for a while, just holding each other.

“But…” Naruto said. “I’m a little scared.”

“That’s okay.”

“I’m afraid of what’ll happen afterwards… I don’t even know if I can live openly with you.”

“I know.” That was something that didn’t worry Sasuke. He didn’t care if he had to live in hiding for the rest of his life, as long as it meant he could be with Naruto. He’d already tried living without him, and it just didn’t work.

“Do you think Konoha is ready for this?” Naruto asked.

“I know of a few openly gay couples.”

“Yeah, but are they the hokage?”

“It doesn’t matter. You’re their leader no matter what, and they’ll just have to learn to respect you for who you are.”

“You make it sound easy.”

“We don’t have to worry about that yet. You’ve yet to tell Hinata.”

Naruto held onto Sasuke tighter. “God help me,” he muttered.

 

 

 


	9. Upheaval - Part 2

 

Naruto came home early that day. The fact that he came home at all had become an unique occurrence lately. Hinata always put on a smile like her mother had taught her to and didn’t ask questions. But she wondered. So when Naruto uttered those fateful few words almost the second he came in the door, her heart dropped.

“Hinata? I need to talk to you.”

She put down the knife and dried her hands on her apron.

“What is it?”

“Sit down, please.”

Naruto sat down on the opposite side of the table. His was fidgeting. He clenched his hands to keep them from moving.

“I need to tell you something,” he said, staring down at the table.

She nodded. She folded her hands in her lap to hide the way they shook.

Naruto took a deep breath.

“I – I’m… I…” He glanced up at her. Then he shook his head. Hinata was starting to get really nervous.

“It can’t be that bad,” she said with a shaky smile, trying to keep her mood up. “You can feel free to tell me anything, you know that.”

Naruto hid his face behind his hands. “Hinata… Please… I… I’ve done something really bad…” He groaned.

Hinata felt worry fill her heart.

“What is it?” She reached out and tried to touch his hand. He flinched away. He must have noticed how startled she got, because his eyes softened and he reached out and held her hand for a second before letting go of her.

“I’m…” Naruto took a deep breath. “I’m seeing someone.”

Hinata felt a weird sense of suspension of time. She stared at Naruto. Suddenly he looked like a stranger to her. His blue eyes weren’t as vibrant as she remembered, and his skin looked ashen.

She was vaguely aware that he was trying to speak to her. She blinked slowly. She could hear her blood buzz in her ears, like she was underwater. Her pulse felt slow and heavy.

She blinked as though trying to clear her eyes, although it felt like she had never seen the world more clearly in her entire life.

“Hinata?”

She noticed that Naruto had placed his hand atop hers. She removed it from underneath his before she could even register that she had moved.

Naruto immediately pulled away from her.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured.

She shook her head. She heard herself speak as though through cotton.

“It’s okay.”

It was not okay. How could it be? Everything she’d built her life around… It had been a sham… a game… a… a meaningless charade. She noticed that she was crying first when she felt tears drip down on her hand. She watched the small drops fall and land on her skin with a detached interest, as though it wasn’t her own hand that she was watching.

“Hinata… Hinata, please… Please talk to me…”

She heard Naruto plead, but she had no power to answer him. She had no idea what to say. Suddenly she slipped to the floor, and then it was like a dam broke. She leant forward and gasped, the tears welling up inside her and exploding inside her chest.

It hurt.

It hurt so much.

She was only distantly aware that someone was holding her. Then she realized it was Naruto. She couldn’t help but note, with a certain irony, that it was the first time he held her with so much care in many, many years. That though only made her sob harder.

“Let go of me,” she mumbled, and tried to wrench out of his grip.

He let go of her, but stayed close.

“I’m sorry,” Naruto repeated, again and again, but it meant nothing. Absolutely nothing…

 

\------

 

At some level, she had known. It had been easy to guess if she had only dared to see it. He was never at home. He never held her. He barely kissed her… They hadn’t slept together since forever.

Maybe that was why he grew tired of her? Maybe he wanted someone who was more demanding? More fun? There were many girls around Naruto who fitted that bill better than Hinata. Hinata just couldn’t believe that any of them would do something like this… Would they?

Her thoughts immediately went to Sakura. She had used to be very close to Naruto, and Hinata had envied that closeness. She also knew that Naruto had used to be in love with Sakura. For many years, Hinata thought that she had no chance with Naruto as long as Sakura was there, but then Sakura had been the one to set them up together.

Hinata realized that it couldn’t be her. She wouldn’t have tried to set them up if she wanted Naruto to herself. She was too focused on Sasuke anyway.

She could think of no other girls that she knew of who had showed interest in Naruto, or that he had shown interest in. He had many admirers among the rest of the female population, though. It could be anyone.

Although Hinata had feared somewhere in her heart that something was going on, she had been unable to admit it to herself. She had never dared think of the possibility, not even once. She always told herself that Naruto just had a lot to do since his work was so important, and that was why he was never at home. She told herself that he didn’t want to wake her up when he came home late at night, and that was why he often slept on the couch.

She was happy that way. She only needed to know that Naruto was there, that he was hers. The knowledge of that alone made up for all the lonely nights.

But she had been wrong. She had been deluding herself the whole time. It was her fault alone that she was now in this situation.

Naruto had left a while ago. Himawari was asleep in her room, and Boruto was on a mission. There was no one else in the kitchen but her. She sat by the kitchen table and numbly stared out the darkened window. She was surprised when she heard someone open the front door. Then Naruto came into the kitchen. She turned away from him. She was unable to look at him. She had not expected him to come back, for some reason, and now that he was there she just wished he would leave again.

“Shouldn’t you go to bed soon?” Naruto asked carefully. “It’s past midnight.”

“Where were you?” she heard herself ask.

“I thought that I should give you some time alone, so I went to Ichiraku’s.”

“Alone?” She whispered. She needed to know. She didn’t want to. It hurt too much. But she found she was unable to not ask.

“…Yeah.”

She could tell that he was telling the truth. He wasn’t the scheming type, which was why this deception hit her so hard.

“Who…” The words stuck in her throat. Her fingers clenched around the fabric of her skirt. “Who is it?”

She hoped Naruto understood what she meant. She couldn’t make herself clarify.

There was a long pause. She thought Naruto wouldn’t answer. But then he did.

“Sasuke.”

She thought for a second he had misunderstood her. Then it hit her, slowly. She stared at him. Naruto’s eyes were downcast. He stood in the middle of the room like he didn’t know where to place himself. He looked like he didn’t belong there. Maybe he never had.

She felt like she didn’t know him anymore.

“Sasuke,” she repeated. She was growing numb.

It couldn’t be. It just couldn’t be.

One part of her refused to accept it, but a different part was starting to put the pieces together. It formed a grim picture. Naruto looking remarkably happier when Sasuke was nearby… Naruto looking at Sasuke and smiling at him like he was the only person in the room… Naruto with a small smile on his lips whenever he talked about Sasuke…

Hinata shook her head.

“No,” she said. “No, no, no…”

Naruto took a step closer to her. She stood and backed away.

“No… How could you?” She felt tears stream down her cheeks. Why? Why him?

Oh god… It had happened right in front of her eyes. Possibly in this very room. She suddenly remembered clearly how Naruto’s attention had been exclusively on Sasuke the whole night during the dinner party. If Sasuke had been a woman, Hinata would have become suspicious immediately, but since he wasn’t… She simply hadn’t considered the possibility.

She had never liked Sasuke, and apparently it was for a reason. She had tried to like him. She had always been nice to him. She had even felt sorry for what he had to go through after the war. No one deserved to be treated that way, not even him.

But the way he had treated his family… His constant absence and nonexistent contact with them… The many times Sakura had failed to explain away his behavior… The sadness that was constantly etched onto her face… Hinata couldn’t justify that. And she couldn’t justify the way Sasuke once had tried to kill both Sakura and Naruto, his two closest people. She couldn’t.

And now her husband… Her caring, gentle husband, had fallen into his claws as well.

She realized with a pang that Naruto had used her as a way to get an outlet for his feelings for Sasuke. That was why he had asked her to cut her hair. That was why he always insisted on taking her from behind when they slept together. She blushed with shame at the thought. She had let him use her.

“Get out,” she heard herself say. There was an unusual authority in her voice. She could see that it caught Naruto off guard. He looked dumbfounded.

She clenched the tabletop.

“Get out,” she repeated, her voice clenched with sorrow and the tears that pushed forward. Her eyesight was getting blurry.

“Get out!” She screamed. “Leave me alone!”

She didn’t notice when he left. She just heard the door shut behind him. She felt empty and wrenched, like an old, used up rag. Everything had been turned upside-down in just the matter of a few hours. Her darling husband… Her prince charming… The boy that in her eyes had been so good, so true… He was reduced to nothing but a shadow of the person that she once knew.

Now he was nothing but a lying, scheming bastard who held an affair going right in front of her face without batting an eyelid.

And that was what hurt the most.

 

\-----

 

The next day, Naruto looked so exhausted that even Shikamaru seemed worried. He kept hinting about Naruto taking more breaks.

“I can take some of the workload off you,” he even suggested. “I don’t mind working some overtime.”

Naruto leant forward and massaged his temples. It was tempting to leave early. Yesterday he had just wandered around town for hours until he ended up on the hokage mountain. He’d sat on top of the fourths head until the sun rose over the horizon. Only then did he go back to the ramshackle house that he shared with Sasuke.

Sasuke had woken up immediately as Naruto tiptoed into the room to get a new change of clothes.

“Did you tell her?” he had asked.

Naruto had just nodded.

“And how did she take it?”

“… Not good.”

He hadn’t stayed for long. He’d felt like being alone. He needed time to think, to take it all in.

He decided he wouldn’t get much work done that day, so he left early as Shikamaru suggested. He wanted to go back to see how Hinata was doing, but he had a feeling she wouldn’t want to see him. He needed to give her more time.

The house on the hill was empty. Naruto guessed Sasuke was out on one of the training fields. He walked around inside the house and took stock of the things that needed fixing. The list was immeasurably long. Suddenly he felt so tired, like the whole weight of the world was on his shoulders. He rested against the wall of what had once been the living room. Then he sunk down on the floor. That was where Sasuke found him when he came back much later.

“She’ll be fine,” he tried to soothe him. “She was the one who chased you out, right? At least she didn’t beg you to stay like you’d carved her heart out and taken it with you.”

“That’s what troubles me,” Naruto admitted. “I’ve never seen her react like that before. I would have expected that kind of reaction from Sakura, but not from her… It was like something happened with her… I’m afraid I ruined something irreparable.”

 

\------

 

Hinata refused to let Naruto come back home and get his stuff. He’d tried once, a few days after he left, but she had kicked him out the second he set a toe inside the door. She even refused to let him see the kids, and Naruto doggedly obeyed her.

It was painful to watch.

Sasuke hadn’t spoken to Sakura since she caught them cheating. He hadn’t tried to contact Sarada either. He didn’t even know if she was back from her mission yet. He realized he wanted to talk to her. To listen to her rambling on about whatever her team had been up to for the last few days. He wondered how Sakura would react if he told her he wanted shared custody for Sarada.

When Naruto came home that evening, he looked almost ghostly with exhaustion. He walked with heavy steps and just leant on the door for a while after he slammed it shut. Sasuke watched him from the door to the kitchen.

“How are you holding up?”

Naruto just shook his head. “I’ve never been more tired in my life.”

“Take a nap, I’ll fix us something to eat.”

The grateful look Naruto gave him made his heart feel warmer.

After dinner Naruto looked a little better.

“I talked to Hinata’s parents today,” he said. “Apparently she’s struggling… She’d asked them to take care of Himawari for a while.” Naruto swallowed thickly. “It’s just as bad as I feared.”

“You can’t blame yourself for it…”

“But it is my fault!” Naruto hid his face in his hands. “It’s all my fault. And the worst part is that I keep wondering if she would have handled it better if I had left her earlier… Before we…”

Sasuke placed a hand on Naruto’s shoulder. “There’s no point in wondering about that now.”

Naruto’s shoulders shook. He was crying. “I know,” he muttered. “But I can’t stop feeling guilty about it.”

Sasuke sidled up to his side and put his arm around him. Naruto leant against his chest and curled up like a small child. Sasuke buried his nose in Naruto’s hair. They sat like that until the sun set and threw the room into darkness.

 

\------

 

The next few days, a lot of things happened in fast succession. Boruto came back from his mission, but Naruto couldn’t make himself tell him what had happened when he delivered the report. He knew it was cowardly, but he already had a lot on his plate. He knew Boruto would come to him the second he discovered something was wrong, and he was right.

The same evening, Boruto came to his office. It was one of the few times he willingly visited his father there. He stood in the middle of the room for a second without speaking. Naruto looked up from his documents.

“What happened?” Boruto asked. “Mom says you’re not coming home.”

Naruto swallowed thickly. “I’m not,” he confirmed.

Boruto shook his head. Anger was simmering right under the surface of his blue eyes. “Why?”

“It’s complicated…”

“Don’t…! Don’t give me a stupid explanation like that! I’m old enough to hear the truth!”

His eyes were filling with tears. He angrily wiped them away.

“What is going on, dad? Please…”

Naruto stood from his chair and came around the desk to stand in front of Boruto. He didn’t know how to find the words to say what he needed to say.

“Come here… Sit down.”

He led Boruto to the couch on one side of the room.

Boruto sat down, surprisingly meek. “What’s wrong with mom?”

“What do you mean?”

“She’s just lying in bed. She said I had to fix dinner myself.”

Naruto suddenly felt his knees give out. He sat down heavily.

“It’s my fault,” he said quietly.

“I figured,” Boruto said.

“I left her,” Naruto said. “Or, she left me. I don’t even know anymore.” He rubbed his face. “We weren’t happy together, Boruto.”

Boruto looked pale. “Are you moving out?” He asked shakily.

Naruto nodded.

“But… Can I see you still?”

Naruto smiled. “Of course you can.” He hoped so, anyway.

Boruto looked a little indecisive for a moment, before he scooted closer and wrapped his arms around Naruto’s middle. Naruto was surprised by the gesture. He placed a hand on Boruto’s head.

“Please… Come home and help mom. I don’t know what to do…” His voice trailed off into a whisper.

 

\------

 

The conversation with Boruto gave Naruto the strength he needed to take action. He talked to Hinata’s parents and they agreed that it would be best if Naruto took care of the kids while she moved in with her parents for a while.

Hinata’s parents wanted to take care of the kids themselves, but somehow Naruto managed to talk them into giving him the responsibility for them, if only for a short while until things had straightened out.

They were surprisingly understanding about the situation, so Naruto figured Hinata hadn’t told them about the reason they broke apart. Most likely, she told them that she kicked him out - which was the truth - but not the reason why she kicked him out. It would be alike her, to take the blame off Naruto even when he deserved to get it.

Sasuke was okay with having the kids there. Naruto suspected that he missed Sarada, although he didn’t talk about it. The only problem was that the rickety house was not suitable for two kids. They needed to get working on it quickly.

Naruto told Boruto and Himawari that he shared a house with Sasuke, but didn’t explain about their relationship. It was not the right time to drop that bomb on them, and he and Sasuke wasn’t quite ready to tell anyone yet. They needed to reach a point with less turbulence first.

The kids hadn’t asked any questions about their arrangement. Boruto had just gotten really excited when he heard that he’d be living in the same house as Sasuke.

Himawari and Boruto had to share the second bedroom, which made Boruto a little muggy. He gave the house a very distasteful look the first time he saw it.

“Were you kicked out too?” Boruto asked Sasuke when they were all sitting around the kitchen table, eating dinner.

Sasuke exchanged a look with Naruto.

“You could say so.”

“Poor Sarada,” Boruto said, and stuffed rice into his mouth. “She’s gonna be devastated.” He didn’t sound like he felt sorry for her at all.

“Close your mouth when you eat,” Naruto said, exasperated at Boruto’s table manners. “Does mom let you eat like that?”

Boruto shrugged. “Yeah?”

“Please close your mouth. You’re spewing rice over the entire table.”

Boruto rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”

But he tried to eat more nicely.

Himawari ate tiny little bites of her food, and amused herself by shuffling her vegetables around on her plates and making animal likenesses out of them.

“Don’t play with your food, Himawari,” Naruto sighed. He’d had them at home for half an hour and he was already tired.

Himawari looked up at him with wide, innocent eyes. Then she went back to playing with her food. Naruto leant his head on his hand.

“Tired?” Sasuke asked.

Naruto nodded.

“I’ll clean up here, you can go and take a nap.”

Naruto gave him a grateful smile and almost leant over to give him a kiss, but then he remembered that he couldn’t. He squeezed his shoulder as he passed him instead.

 

\------

 

“Where’s papa?”

It was the third time Himawari asked that.

“He’s sleeping,” Sasuke answered. For the third time.

“Hm,” she said. Then she continued playing with her cat plushie.

“Where’s mama?”

That one was new.

“She’s at your grandparents house. She’s resting.”

“Hm.”

Sasuke sighed softly. He had never interacted with children as young as her. He was unsure what to do. When did she go to sleep? Could she get ready for bed on her own or did he have to help her? He had no idea.

“Himawari,” he said.

She looked up from her game and came over to him, and then she climbed into his lap. He got a little surprised. He had only meant for her to come over, he hadn’t dreamed she would be this trusting. Had she been his daughter, she would have kept a careful distance to a stranger at least. Sarada even kept a timid distance to him.

But this child was not an Uchiha. She was completely trusting and it touched Sasuke. He gently petted her hair. She smiled and then she fell asleep against his shoulder.

Well, shit…

He carried her to bed in the room that they had prepared for the kids. It was slightly drafty there, so he packed her up tightly in the duvet. She slept on completely unperturbed. Sasuke carded a lock of hair away from her forehead and watched her sleep for a moment. He had no idea how giving it could be to take care of a child. He realized he’d missed a lot from when Sarada grew up, and it filled him with regret. He wished he could take all those years back.

 

\------

 

Naruto woke up in the middle of the night from a tiny hand shaking his shoulder.

“Dad…?”

“Mhm… Himawari?” Naruto blinked in confusion.

“I can’t sleep,” she muttered.

“What’s wrong?” he lent on his elbow. “Are you thirsty? Do you need to pee?”

She shook her head. She toyed nervously with her plushie.

“Did you have a bad dream?”

She nodded.

“Do you want to sleep here?”

She nodded again.

Naruto made room for her between him and Sasuke. When Boruto asked why they shared a room, Naruto had explained it away by telling him that they were sharing so that he and Himawari could get their own room. Thankfully he hadn’t noticed that they were sharing a futon, since that would be more difficult to explain.

Himawari didn’t seem to think it strange, though. She fell asleep immediately, content with being close to someone she trusted.

 

\------

 

Naruto was the first one up in the morning. He woke Boruto first, but he was unwilling to get up. He just grumbled when Naruto shook him awake. On the third try he finally sat up a little groggily, his hair sticking out in every which way.

By then Sasuke was up too and had started preparing breakfast. Naruto tried to wake Himawari up, but that proved to be even more difficult than with Boruto. She barely stirred when he talked to her.

“I can’t do this,” Naruto murmured when he was down in the kitchen again and Boruto still hadn’t shown his face. “How did Hinata get them up and ready every morning?”

Sasuke had no more answers to that than Naruto had.

“I have to go to work soon,” Naruto said as he threw a look on the clock. He sighed. “I better try to get Himawari up.”

Sasuke stopped him from leaving by placing a hand around his waist.

“Get something to eat. I’ll deal with the kids.”

“Are you sure?”

“Of course I am. Do you expect me to stand here and let the hokage be late for work?”

“I don’t want you to feel burdened with taking care of kids that you never asked for.”

Sasuke shook his head. He pressed a gentle kiss to Naruto’s lips.

“I asked for you, didn’t I? And the kids come with you, like Sarada comes with me.”

Naruto placed his hands on Sasuke’s cheeks and gave him a lingering, longing kiss.

“Thank you,” he whispered.

 

\-----

 

Sasuke just needed to pull the covers off Boruto and he grumblingly got up. Himawari was trickier. He tried to shake her awake to no avail. So he picked her up and carried her to the bathroom. She did her bathroom routine in a daze. She even fell asleep by the sink while she brushed her teeth.

Once Boruto was up and moving he was much more helpful. He shooed on Himawari in a manner that showed that this was routine and soon they were both ready for breakfast.

“Where’s papa?” Himawari asked again.

“He’s at work,” Boruto snapped. “As usual.”

“Don’t talk about your father that way,” Sasuke said.

Boruto pouted and picked at his food.

“It’s disrespectful,” Sasuke said in a gentler tone.

“Why does he work so much all the time?” Boruto said bitterly. “I don’t get it. He never spends time with his kids. Does he really deserve respect?”

“You know why he works so much,” Sasuke said calmly.

“What about you, then?” Boruto asked. “Sarada says you’re never home either. But you’re not the hokage.” He sent Sasuke a narrowed look.

Sasuke returned the look. Boruto had to avert his eyes.

“That’s true,” he said. “But I had my reasons too.”

“That’s all my mom ever says about dad,” Boruto muttered under his breath. “You say there are reasons, but I never get to hear them.”

Sasuke sighed. “You’ll understand when you grow older.”

How did you explain to a child about responsibility? About the fact that even as grown-ups they weren't always a hundred percent in control of their own lives? He would understand as he grew older, but right now he only saw that his own needs weren't fulfilled. 

Boruto shook his head. "I thought at least you would understand me," he said through his teeth. "But you're just as bad as dad."

He got up and stomped out. 

"Come on, Himawari," he called from the hall. "I'll take you to school." 

When the kids had left, Sasuke cleaned up after breakfast before he took his daily training round. He’d have to shorten it today if he was going to have time to buy groceries. He stopped for a second in the doorway as he realized he was really starting to step up to his role as a parent… only not for his own child.

He hadn’t walked far from the house when he became aware of someone following him. He stopped and turned towards the small movement he saw among the bushes. He waited for a few seconds and Sarada came slinking out. She straightened up and stared him down. Her expression was schooled into a strict mask, but her eyes betrayed her. They regarded him with hurt.

“Why are you hiding out here?” she said, her tone accusing. “I saw Boruto leave from here… and the hokage… What is going on?”

The last sentence was said almost pleadingly.

Sasuke was glad she had chosen to seek him out on her own. He hadn’t yet talked to Sakura, but he had sent her a few messages, all of which had gone unanswered.

“I’m sorry, Sarada,” was all he could say. 

She had no idea how sorry he was.

“For what?” she nearly whispered.

“For not being there for you.”

Her face softened a bit. Her eyes grew teary. She blinked to hide it.

“It’s okay,” she whispered. “I just thought… I thought you’d left us for good this time.”

“No… But I left your mother.”

Sarada's eyes became wide. The hurt was etched in her entire face now. “Why?” One single tear rolled down her cheek. “You said… You said that you and mom stayed together because of _me_. Am I not enough anymore?”

“It’s not like that… Sometimes people grow apart. I wanted to stay longer because of you, but at one point I had to face the fact that your mom and I didn’t make each other happy anymore.”

The tears were running freely down Sarada’s cheeks now. Sasuke took one step closer. He wanted to comfort her, but she moved away from him. She gave him one last, broken look before she ran away from him.

Sasuke was left feeling like someone had thorn his heart out.

 

\------

 

It was a week later, when Naruto came downstairs in the morning to find Sasuke carving animal-shapes from the vegetables for Himawari’s lunch, that he realized that they’d manage. He kissed the nape of Sasuke’s neck, and Sasuke leant back against his chest.

“Are the kids up?”

“Himawari is in the bathroom. I guess I have to go up and check on her so that she doesn’t fall asleep in the shower again. Boruto is almost on his way out of bed, I think.”

He held Sasuke a little longer.

“Have you thought about talking to Sakura again?”

Sasuke shook his head.

Last week Sasuke had showed up at his old home and demanded to talk to Sakura. He had suggested they should have shared custody for Sarada, but Sakura had just laughed at him and asked him how he had the guts to come there and ask for shared custody for a child he’d never cared about.

Sasuke had been very quiet afterwards. He knew that if he asked for a trial, he’d loose. No one would choose him, a former missing nin trained under a criminal, over Sakura who had an unblemished track record.

”It’ll work out in the end,” Naruto said softly.

He really hoped it would.

 

 

 

 


	10. In The Wake Of The Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this is so late... I always think vacations will let me write more, but that never happens... Anyway, this chapter is the last one before the epilogue. Enjoy!

 

Naruto woke up to the first rays of morning light, and the first thing he laid eyes on was Sasuke’s naked shoulder. His skin looked unearthly pale in the bright light. Naruto ran his fingertips along the sloping curve of muscle and skin, down along Sasuke’s arm to his hand on the pillow. Sasuke was sill asleep. His dark hair swept down across his forehead, one lock stuck over his eyelashes. Naruto carefully loosened it and let it fall to the side over Sasuke’s brow.

He realized with a pang of amazement that this was how every morning would be from now on. Waking up next to Sasuke… No matter where they were or what their daily life was like, just waking up with him gave Naruto the boost that he needed to get out of bed and face the day.

He leant over Sasuke and kissed his forehead as gently as possible. Sasuke groaned. Then he blinked and stared at Naruto, momentarily confused.

Naruto stalled his amused laughter. If he’d known Sasuke was this adorable in the morning… Oh god, he could never tell him. It would be his secret.

The film of confusion left Sasuke’s eyes after a few seconds as he woke properly.

Naruto gave him a good-morning kiss. 

They went to the bathroom together. The shower was just barely spewing out a small drizzle of lukewarm water, and it lacked shower curtains so everything in the tiny room got wet. After they’d both brushed their teeth, Naruto nudged Sasuke’s chin and kissed him. It turned into a deep, hungry kiss. Naruto rested his forehead against Sasuke’s as he tried to calm down.

“I need to get ready for work,” he said with reluctance.

“Mm…”

He kissed Sasuke one more time before he pulled away.

The kitchen was still in very bad shape. There was electricity in the house, but what worked and what didn’t was a guessing game. Between the two of them, they had absolutely no kitchen appliances. They had gotten some new stuff here and there as they needed it, but their kitchen was far from well stocked. They had what they needed to get by, though.

Naruto was a disaster in the kitchen. Anything he touched had a habit of magically combusting. The only thing he felt a certain confidence with, was boiling water for instant ramen. He was a bit ashamed to admit that.

Sasuke was slightly more proficient, but since he had only one hand there was a limit to what he could do. The first morning together, everything had been chaos, but now they were starting to get acclimated to a life without wives. At least they managed to get a decent breakfast on the table in the morning, as opposed to the first few days where they lived on coffee and takeaway.

After having the kids for a week and a half they had been forced to get into some routines, and now those routines had become easier to uphold. Naruto set a pot of water on the heater while Sasuke got the food on the table. Then Naruto helped cutting what needed cutting, since Sasuke wasn’t so proficient in that area with only one arm. He refused to admit it but Naruto knew he was grateful for some help.

Hinata had taken the kids back the second she felt strong enough to handle them on her own. Her parents had been the mediators between her and Naruto, and they had been very adamant about the fact that Hinata, the mother, needed to have the kids with her. Naruto was working too much to take care of them anyway, right?

Reluctantly, Naruto had to let them go. The only upside with not having them in the house, was that he got Sasuke to himself. And that they didn’t need to hide their affection.

Now that they finally had some time to each other, they were barely able to keep their hands off each other.

After having cleaned off the table, Naruto kissed Sasuke good-bye. The kiss turned slow and deep.

“I have to go,” Naruto said when he managed to pull away for a moment.

Sasuke nodded, but didn’t let go of Naruto. They kissed again. Naruto pressed his moist lips to the corner of Sasuke’s mouth. Sasuke captured his lips again.

Naruto threw a look on the clock.

“I’m running late.”

He nuzzled Sasuke’s hair.

Sasuke sighed. He pushed Naruto away. “Go now.”

He straightened Naruto’s collar and ran his thumb over Naruto’s reddened lips.

“Make sure you look presentable, hokage-sama,” Sasuke said with a crooked smile.

Naruto swallowed thickly.

Sasuke cocked an eyebrow. “Does it turn you on when I use honorifics?”

Naruto blushed. “Maybe… a little…”

He leant forward and kissed the top of Sasuke’s cheekbone before whispering, “It also turns me on to think of doing the dirty on my desk.”

Sasuke looked him right in the eyes. “No,” he said. “That’s not happening.”

Naruto pouted.

“No,” Sasuke repeated. “We tried it once and almost got caught.”

Naruto sighed. "Fine... But I really have to go now."

He kissed Sasuke goodbye and hurried out the door.

 

\-----

 

Shikamaru was getting visibly worried about Naruto.

“I left her,” Naruto said one morning when Shikamaru asked him why he’d heard that Hinata had moved back to her parents.

Shikamaru was quiet for a second while he contemplated that.

“Damn, that’s… Do you have somewhere to stay?”

“Yeah…” He pondered how much he should reveal. “I’m renting a house together with Sasuke for now.”

He owned the house, to be exact, but that made it sound so definite. He wanted to give the impression that his relationship with Sasuke was casual.

Shikamaru’s eyebrows lifted.

“Sasuke?” Then he seemed to accept the idea, like he so often did when he was actually contemplating the meaning of what he’d heard.

Shikamaru didn’t ask about anything else, and Naruto was grateful. He didn’t want to discuss it. He just longed to get back to Sasuke and forget about the world around them.

 

\-----

 

Sasuke was surprised, relieved and slightly cautious when he got the letter from Sakura saying she accepted to share custody for Sarada. When they met to discuss it, Sakura refused to look at him.

“I’m not doing it for you,” she said quietly. She looked pale and drawn, as though she hadn’t slept properly for a long time. “I’m doing it for Sarada. I don’t want her to loose her father again.”

“Thank you,” Sasuke said anyway.

“She wants to see you,” Sakura said almost reluctantly. “You can have her for a few days while I take some longer shifts at work.”

She stood and left him to pay the bill for the coffee she hadn’t touched.

Naruto was relieved when Sasuke told him about Sarada. He hugged him tight.

“I told you,” he said. “It’d work out.”

 

\-----

 

Sakura and Sasuke agreed on a bi-weekly arrangement with Sarada. It was obvious that Sarada and Sakura had fought a lot. Sarada didn’t even say goodbye to her mother when Sasuke came to get her the first time. Sakura looked so tired, Sasuke almost felt like comforting her. Almost.

She was rigid the entire three minutes he was there and only spoke to him in short, chopped sentences. She tried to kiss Sarada goodbye, but she wrenched out of her grip.

Sarada was quiet the entire first day, but she didn’t seem opposed to staying with Sasuke. After a while, she slowly started loosening up.

When Naruto came home she brightened up a bit. She asked him about his job and his duties, and listened intently to what he told her. Sasuke knew that Naruto smoothed over the boring parts of his job as well as he could, and delved eagerly into the more exciting parts, like the exciting places he’d traveled to, and the interesting people he’d met.

When he spoke about his job like that, Sasuke could see that he still loved what he did.

After Sarada had gone to bed that night, Naruto told Sasuke that he had talked to Hinata.

“She came to my office today. We had a long talk about the kids. She said she doesn’t want to keep them away from me, but she knows that with the hours I work it isn’t easy for me to take care of them.”

“I don’t mind helping you,” Sasuke said.

Naruto smiled. “I know. I told her that, but she got really closed off afterwards. But somehow I managed to talk her into letting me have them for about a week every month.”

Sasuke let out a breath he hadn’t been aware he was holding. He hugged Naruto.

“I’m glad,” he said.

Naruto hugged him close. “We’ll be like a family,” he said with excitement. “I think this calls for some celebration. What do you say to going out for a drink?”

“We can’t. Sarada…”

“Oh, yeah… I guess Sakura wouldn’t be very happy about that.”

“But…” Sasuke looked up at Naruto. “Sarada leaves on a mission tomorrow… She’ll be away for a few days.”

Naruto grinned. “It’s about high time we did something fun together, don’t you think?”

 

\-----

 

“This is a bad idea,” Sasuke said.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got us covered.” There was a mischievous glint in Naruto’s eyes.

He led Sasuke into the hokage office. It was late, around eleven o’clock in the evening, and the hokage tower was almost deserted.

Naruto closed the door behind them. The huge windows that usually provided a view of the whole town were now covered by dark curtains.

“You got curtains,” Sasuke said, a dubious tone to his voice.

Naruto shrugged. “Hey, I felt exposed sitting here working at night when everyone could see me and easily target me from outside.” He sat down behind the desk and grinned at Sasuke. “The fact that it allows me to have a little more privacy is only a bonus.”

They’d gone out to eat that evening and during the dinner Naruto had gotten a few drinks too many. After they were done eating he insisted that they go back to his office for some fun. Sasuke must have been more buzzed than he thought, because here he was now. Anyone could walk in that door at any moment. The building was never completely empty.

Naruto beckoned him over. Sasuke approached slowly. He shrugged off his jacket. It was Naruto’s and was slightly baggy. Sasuke had depressingly few clothes besides those he used to travel in, so he’d accepted Naruto’s jacket when he offered, even though its sleeves were a garish orange.

Naruto leant back in his chair. He grabbed Sasuke’s waist and pulled him closer. He nuzzled Sasuke’s stomach through the thin, black fabric of his shirt. He hitched the shirt up and nipped at his skin. Sasuke shuddered and pressed closer.

Naruto caressed Sasuke’s thighs. It was obvious that the whole setting was turning him on. His eyes were dark and zeroed in on Sasuke’s crotch. He unbuttoned Sasuke’s pants, and pressed a kiss to the exposed bulge in his briefs. Sasuke sighed.

He ran his hand lazily through Naruto’s hair, down to his nape where he played with the short hairs. Naruto groaned. He looked up at Sasuke and pressed his lips to the skin just above the lining of Sasuke’s briefs. Sasuke swallowed. The desire was making him hard, fast.

Naruto nudged Sasuke forward till he was standing between Naruto’s legs. Then he pulled Sasuke’s pants and briefs down to his thighs. He took his rising erection in his hands and let his lips nudge the tip of Sasuke’s cock. He looked amused when Sasuke couldn’t hold down a small groan. Then he took Sasuke’s whole cock into his mouth and sucked. Sasuke’s knees nearly buckled. Naruto was starting to become good at giving blowjobs. He seemed to enjoy it. His eyes were fixed on Sasuke’s face, and every time Sasuke met them they twinkled with amusement.

Sasuke knew that he probably looked slack jawed and out of it, but he honestly didn’t care.

Naruto pulled back. “Do you want me to make you come first?”

“No,” Sasuke panted. It was tempting, but he wanted Naruto to fuck him.

Naruto stood and spun Sasuke around so that he was facing the desk. Then he put a hand on his back and pushed him down on it. Sasuke’s thighs pressed against the edge of the desk and his cheek met the desktop. He used his right arm to support the shoulder that took the most of his weight. Standing like that, with his ass up in the air, should have been humiliating but it wasn't. Just the excitement from the wait, while he had no idea what Naruto was doing behind him, made his cock leak precum onto the desk. Since his right arm was trapped, he had no means to relieve himself. He was completely at Naruto’s mercy.

But he also trusted him completely. He rocked his hips impatiently when Naruto seemed to stall with his next move. He heard him chuckle. Warm hands grabbed his hips and slid down to spread his ass cheeks. He heard how Naruto’s breathing changed, got heavier. He closed his eyes briefly, overwhelmed by the desire that clenched inside him.

Naruto pushed Sasuke’s shirt farther up so that his lower back was exposed. Then he took a step back.

“Get a move on,” Sasuke growled.

He heard Naruto rustle with something. He was taking his sweet time. Sasuke lifted himself up, tired of the waiting, but Naruto was there immediately and pushed him down again. Sasuke felt Naruto’s cock, warm and hard, brush against his left ass cheek. He lay down again. Naruto pushed his legs farther apart with his foot. He wasn’t satisfied until Sasuke’s pants stopped him from moving any farther. Then one of Naruto’s fingers pressed against Sasuke’s exposed asshole.

Surprised by the sudden touch to such a sensitive spot, Sasuke gasped. Naruto’s finger was wet and slid in easily. He added more fingers in fast succession until he was certain that Sasuke was ready for him. By then, Sasuke had completely forgotten where they were, as well as who they were apart from that he was exactly where he needed to be with the only person he cared to be there with.

Naruto didn’t waste time sinking his cock into Sasuke’s tight, wet hole. Sasuke felt him push entirely inside in one, outdrawn motion, until he was settled as deeply within Sasuke as he could come. His thighs touched the back of Sasuke’s, and the last, small thrust ensured that Sasuke got pressed down against the table to the point where he thought his back wouldn’t bend further.

Naruto, eager to feel Sasuke clench around his entire length, grabbed Sasuke’s hips and showed him closer just as he pushed deeply inside of him. He groaned and muttered something that sounded like an endearment under his breath. Sasuke fought to find purchase on the floor so that he could help push his body closer to Naruto’s.

“Sasuke,” Naruto nearly growled. His tone was so deep, it made a rush of desire run down Sasuke’s back.

Naruto sounded desperate. He was clenching Sasuke’s hips so hard it would leave bruises. Sasuke realized that he was holding himself back. He pulled out slowly and tried to set a slow pace. Sasuke arched and twisted his upper body. He didn’t want to stand up, but he wished he could’ve had more purchase to control the rhythm. Now he was just completely at Naruto’s mercy, and Naruto was apparently set on taking it slow.

Each slow, deep thrust got steadily harder, until Naruto was slamming into him with every roll of his hips. He wasn’t hitting Sasuke’s prostate head on, but it was so fucking good nevertheless, and it just built up much slower. Naruto shifted slightly as he thrust and moved harder when he noticed Sasuke tensing.

His breathing was rough, interspersed with small groans. He was leaning over Sasuke, his breath fanning over his sweaty neck. Sasuke’s head was down below his arms now. He watched his own cock bunch with each thrust. He was panting hard, his mouth open. His eyes clenched every time Naruto hit an especially good spot. Naruto's wide cock buried to the hilt inside him with each thrust, and the thrusts became slightly faster each time Sasuke gasped in pleasure. His hand clenched. His upper body tensed, his back arching.

God, this was the sweetest torture. He wasn’t even close to coming, and yet his entire body tensed up because he wanted more. Sasuke was slowly getting closer to a peak, his balls clenching and his cock pulsing.

And then… Naruto pulled out.

Sasuke moaned softly. He almost whimpered. He twisted his neck to see what Naruto was doing. Naruto ran his hands down Sasuke’s sides, down his back and around to his chest. He leant down and kissed Sasuke.

“Turn around,” he said.

Sasuke’s muscles felt like jelly. With some assistance from Naruto he was flipped over onto his back, his knees against his chest, his left shoe thrown away somewhere and his pants hanging off his right leg. Naruto kissed the back of his knee. Sasuke moaned, and then Naruto sank into him again and the moan turned into a gasp. From this angle, Naruto’s cock pressed firmly against his sensitive prostate. He moaned as Naruto moved carefully, not settling entirely within him. He started up with slow thrusts again.

Sasuke opened his eyes, he couldn’t remember closing them, and caught Naruto watching him with a soft, focused look. His blue eyes brightened as he caught Sasuke’s gaze. He rolled his hips languidly, and kissed everything on Sasuke that was within reach. His ankle, his calf, his knee. He grabbed his hand and ran his lips over his knuckles.

Then he pushed deeper in as he leant forward and kissed Sasuke’s chest. Sasuke spread his legs wider with a soft moan. Naruto was holding his thighs so he didn’t have to use so much strength holding them up. Sasuke had never been fucked so thoroughly before. The desk ensured that he was lodged in one place all the time, only able to accept what Naruto was giving him. Naruto’s hands were keeping his legs in place, slightly pressed to his chest, so that he couldn’t close them around Naruto and help setting the pace. All he could do was to run his hand through Naruto’s hair as he leant down to kiss his chest, his tongue running over one nipple, then the other. He tugged slightly as Naruto deliberately teased him, nipping slightly at one nipple but holding back on his thrusts as Sasuke arched up in a needy search for more.

Sasuke groaned in frustration. He nudged the back of Naruto’s head till he obliged and leant closer, their chests touching and Naruto’s cock settling deeper within Sasuke. Sasuke nipped at Naruto’s ear, and then, when Naruto whined and tried to kiss him, Sasuke closed his teeth around Naruto’s lower lip, and tugged.

A power struggle started, where Naruto tried to steal a kiss without getting bitten by Sasuke.

“I can’t take it anymore,” Sasuke admitted. He ran his hand through Naruto’s hair, mussing it up even worse than it already was. “It’s going too slow.”

“You want me to fuck you harder?” Naruto’s eyes were twinkling with amusement. He obviously wanted Sasuke to say it.

Sasuke’s lips tightened.

“Remember back in your house?” Naruto asked, his eyebrow cocked. “You were pretty vocal then. It turned you on, didn’t it?”

Sasuke glared at him. His cheeks got warm.

“It turned you on to get fucked in that room. Just admit it.”

Sasuke refused to say anything about the matter. Naruto sighed. He pulled out and hoisted Sasuke up so that he was sitting on the edge of the desk.

“Careful,” Sasuke snapped. He didn’t appreciate getting manhandled.

“I’ve always wondered how it works out to fuck while standing,” Naruto said. He gave Sasuke a critical look. “But I think you’re too heavy for me to lift you for that long.”

Sasuke leant back on one hand. “Thanks.”

Naruto grabbed the back of Sasuke’s left knee and hoisted it up. “Can you maintain this position?”

Sasuke shifted a bit so that he was resting on his right thigh, his right arm supporting his weight, and his left leg hoisted up. Naruto placed a hand on his waist and pulled him closer. He positioned his cock against Sasuke’s hole and pushed in. It was a slightly difficult angle. Sasuke leaned back a bit, rolling his hips, till Naruto slipped inside. He was so close to Naruto now that they could kiss without problem, and they did.

“We could have posed for the fucking kama sutra,” Sasuke murmured as Naruto started thrusting experimentally.

Naruto flashed him a grin. “Gay edition.”

Sasuke snorted.

The position was hell to maintain, they soon discovered. Naruto just kept slipping out.

“If you want to fuck standing upright,” Sasuke said, and pushed Naruto away. He stood and turned around, pressing his back to Naruto’s chest. “You don’t need to hold me up.”

They were almost the same height. Sasuke was a bit taller, but only by an inch or so. He grasped behind him and closed his fingers around Naruto’s cock. He bent slightly forward, shoving his hips up, and placed the tip of Naruto’s cock against his hole. Sinking down on him was surprisingly easy.

Naruto embraced him from behind. He nuzzled Sasuke’s neck and rolled his hips. Sasuke almost went lax. He gasped.

“Oh…”

“Good?” Naruto kissed Sasuke’s neck. He squared his stance and thrust more firmly upwards. He almost lifted Sasuke off the floor. Sasuke moaned. He sunk into Naruto’s embrace so that Naruto had to hold him anyway, but his feet were still on the ground, still supporting them. He found that the feeling got even better if he pressed his legs a little closer.

Naruto couldn’t maintain that position for long. His thrusts got more frenetic.

“I’m coming,” Sasuke gasped with surprise. “I’m…”

He threw his head back with a raw groan.

He felt Naruto’s teeth graze his shoulder. He lifted Sasuke up so that his feet were no longer touching the floor, and just let go, fucking him franticly and without finesse. Sasuke, who was still coming, gasped and whimpered. It was painful but so good at the same time, to have his abused prostate attacked by a frenzy of hard, desperate thrusts. He felt Naruto come in the way his body tensed and his hips shoved desperately up against Sasuke’s. He buried himself deep inside of him and stayed there for a few seconds, his cock pulsing against the thin walls of Sasuke’s insides.

“I wasn’t that heavy after all,” Sasuke teased when he could gather enough breath to speak again.

Naruto planted a firm, wet kiss to the base of Sasuke’s neck before slipping out of him and setting him down. Sasuke found that he was a bit shaky on his feet. He put a hand on the desk to support himself.

“How long did we last?”

Naruto was still panting. “Long,” he said. He pulled Sasuke closer and kissed him. “Really long.” He chuckled, as though he couldn’t believe what they’d done.

Naruto was still mostly dressed. Only his pants were open. Sasuke’s clothes were seemingly everywhere, and hanging scewedly off his body. He pulled down his shirt and almost lost his balance trying to put his briefs and pants back on. His hand was sticky with come from when he had caught his own load. Naruto offered him a tissue from one of his drawers.

“Did this satisfy your kink?” Sasuke asked.

Naruto sat down in his chair, presentable again. He looked up at Sasuke with a warm grin. “Definitely.”

“Then hone the memory, because I’m never doing it again.”

The grin fell from Naruto’s lips. He looked heartbroken. “Why not?”

“You should be working in here,” Sasuke said. “Not fucking.”

Naruto rolled his chair closer to Sasuke.

“But you liked it? Right?”

“Of course I did. But that still doesn’t mean I’ll do it again.”

Naruto studied him keenly. “No,” he said. He leant back and rested his chin on his palm. “No, you liked it more than usual, I could tell.” A slow smirk spread on his lips. “I think you have a small exhibitionism kink.”

Sasuke schooled his face into an unimpressed mask.

“And you don’t?” was all he could think of saying.

Naruto shrugged. “At least I bought curtains.”

Sasuke nudged his shoulder. Then he sank down onto his lap. He felt mellow and relaxed.

“This was a nice evening,” he said. He placed his arms around Naruto’s neck. “We should do it more often.”

“I’m glad you’ve changed your mind-“

“I meant the dinner. And then we could go home to our own house and have as much fun as we want there. Out of other people’s view.”

Naruto chuckled. “Okay, fine.”

But as they left the room and Naruto closed the door behind them, Sasuke distinctly heard him mutter, “But you’ll change your mind.”

Sasuke just rolled his eyes.

Maybe he would.

So what.

 

 


	11. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, finally, the last chapter :) I hope you'll enjoy!

 

_One Year Later_

 

“Naruto…”

“Mhm…”

Someone nudged his shoulder.

“Naruto.”

“Yea, m’ awake…”

“I know it’s your day off, but you can’t sleep away the entire day.”

“Just a few more minutes.”

He pulled the sheet over his head. Sasuke sighed.

“I thought you wanted to do something together with the kids today.”

“…The kids?”

Naruto sat up. He rubbed his eyes.

“Shit… I forgot…”

He stared at Sasuke, who sat on the edge of their bed.

“Why didn’t you wake me earlier?” Naruto said.

“I tried.”

Naruto hurried to get dressed. When he came downstairs, Himawari came barreling into his arms. “Hey, kiddo.” He hugged her. “How is my little dumpling doing?”  
Himawari giggled.

Boruto came storming into the hallway. “Dad! Can you tell Sarada to stop bothering me?”

Sarada came storming out behind him. “He’s the one who’s bothering me! He says I’m useless at the game!”

“Shush, the both of you,” Sasuke said, and the two kids shut up immediately. “You can solve this on your own. You are thirteen years old, you know how to share. Right, Sarada?”

Sarada got a angry red blush on her cheeks.

“Yes, papa,” she muttered.

Sarada, as a lonely child, had a bit difficulty adjusting to being part of a bigger family.

“There won’t be more video games today anyway,” Naruto said and set Himawari down. “We’re going on a camping trip!”

Boruto groaned. He was practically constantly glued to the TV screen.

“But I’ve just reached the boss level! I can’t leave now.”

“The game will still be there when you get back,” Naruto said.

Boruto turned to Sarada. “If it weren’t for you I’d been on the next level by now.”

Boruto might complain a lot, but he wouldn’t have shared with Sarada unless he honestly wanted to. He had a soft spot for her, even though he constantly complained about her.

“Everything is packed and ready, and the breakfast is on the table. We were waiting for you,” Sasuke said.

Naruto kissed Sasuke. “Thank you.”

 

\-----

 

The camping trip was a success. Despite Boruto’s complaining, he loved it when they got out in nature. After they had found a camp site, Sasuke taught Himawari to throw shuriken at a tree stump while Naruto showed Boruto and Sarada how to catch fish with their hands. It turned into a playfight where Boruto and Sarada teamed up on him to try and soak Naruto. It ended with them all getting soaked through to the skin.

By then it was starting to get dark. Sasuke lit a bonfire with a fire jutsu.

“Papa!” Sarada exclaimed in excitement. “Teach me that!”

“Yeah, why haven’t you taught her yet?” Naruto asked. “Didn’t you learn it when you were, like, six?”

Sarada frowned at Sasuke. “You did?”

“My dad was fond of tradition,” Sasuke said. “I’ve wanted to teach you, but there hasn’t been time.”

“Teach me now!”

“Maybe now isn’t the best time,” Naruto shot in. “We need to make dinner. Maybe your dad can teach you tomorrow?”

“Yes!” Sarada was nearly jumping up and down with excitement.

“I want to learn it too,” Himawari said with a pout.

“Sweetie…” Naruto petted her head. “You’re not a fire element. I’ll teach you something else much cooler when you get a bit older.”

She beamed up at him. “Really?”

“For sure!”  


\-----

 

For the past year their house had been renovated into its original grandeur, with two extra bedrooms and a huge and well maintained garden. Naruto had been rekindling a love for plants that he’d nearly forgot he had with all the long working hours. He was still working a lot, but somehow he was starting to see the joy in his job again. He’d hired someone to help him with all the paperwork in addition to the help that Shikamaru was providing. This as well as the fact that he now looked forward to coming home each evening had made his life much more joyful.

Sasuke had Sarada every other week, while Naruto had his kids one full week every month. If the kids weren’t home, then he had Sasuke to look forward to coming home to. He hadn’t been out of Konoha for more than a few weeks at a time for the past year, but it seemed like he wasn’t opposed to staying in the town. When he left it usually happened suddenly, and he usually got very quiet a few days before he left. Naruto could tell when he was in that mood, so he didn’t ask. Sasuke always came back in time for the week that his daughter stayed with them, so Naruto wasn’t worried that he’d go off on a long trip without warning.

It was Sasuke who’d done most of the work on the house. Naruto had helped where he could. He’d suggested that they should get someone professional to fix it, but Sasuke was adamant about fixing it himself and Naruto agreed with that. He liked to know that they’d built up the house with nothing but their own hard work, just like with their relationship and the family that they’d now become.

 

\-----

 

Naruto snaked a hand around Sasuke’s waist and leant his chin on his shoulder.

“What are you guys doing?”

They were standing on a hill outside their house. The land around their house was dominated by sloping hills and small copses of trees. 

“Look, Naruto!” Sarada said.

She made the hand seals for a katon and blew out a huge ball of fire over the scorched ground.

“That’s great, Sarada!” Naruto exclaimed. “You’re even more a genius than your dad, you did it in only a few days!”

“I was six,” Sasuke grit out.

“Aw, some encouragement never hurt anyone,” Naruto said and kissed Sasuke on the cheek.

Sarada frowned at them. “I’m still getting used to that,” she said when she noticed they were looking at her.

It was over half a year since they told their kids about their relationship, but they stilled tuned down the PDA when they were around them. Sarada had guessed on her own that there was something more between them after only a few months, but she had still been equally as shocked as Boruto when they told them… only in a less… explosive way…

Boruto… He had refused to talk to them or see them for a good few weeks, but as soon as he got used to the idea he slowly came shuffling back. He side eyed them a lot in the beginning, like he thought they were gonna start kissing out of the blue, but he settled with the knowledge surprisingly fast.

Sarada, on the other hand, could still give them curious glances when they touched or kissed, like she couldn’t entirely believe that they were actually dating.

“So… will there be a wedding soon?” She'd asked once not long after they’d told her.

Sasuke and Naruto had exchanged a long glance. They hadn’t even considered that.

“I don’t think so,” Sasuke said at the same time that Naruto said, “Not yet.”

They’d exchanged glances again. This time Sasuke arched one eyebrow in surprise. Naruto just shrugged.

“I haven’t thought about it before, but it sounds kinda nice.”

“You really think that’s gonna happen? Here? In Konoha?”

“Well… I don’t know…”

They had told Sarada and Boruto not to tell anyone about their relationship, and they trusted them to keep their promises. They’d also decided not to tell Himawari yet for the same reasons, but it was starting to become difficult to hide it from her. They kept forgetting themselves and sharing kisses or lingering touches that she might pick up on and retell because she didn’t know she wasn’t supposed to.

Himawari was a strange child. She seemed to live in her own world. There was no telling what she’d pick up on, and what might slip right past her notice. At school she was a bit dreamy and quiet, and liked to do her own things. The other kids mostly left her alone but there had been incidents where she had been picked on by some of her classmates.

But she never complained about it. If she even mentioned it, it was almost in passing and with a light tone that belied any underlying sorrow… if there was any.

Naruto actually wondered if such slights simply repelled her. She was very unlike her mother in that way.

He hadn’t talked with Hinata in a very long while. They’d accidentally met at a festival once. They had exchanged a few words as friends, but they had nothing much to talk about and it became very obvious then. Hinata had been drinking a bit and she actually laughed a bit and commented that they really were very unlike each other. She had met a new guy, someone from her clan, who was stoic and quiet but seemed like a nice and decent guy, and she seemed happy.

Her laughter had died out, though, when Sasuke joined them. He eyed Hinata with something almost akin to regret. They didn’t exchange words, just a small nod in greeting before Hinata excused herself, but it made Naruto happy nevertheless. It meant that they weren’t set on being enemies, and maybe one day Hinata could actually greet them both without any trace of resentment.

 

\-----

 

One evening Naruto came home late to find Sasuke, Boruto and Himawari heaped onto Naruto and Sasuke’s bed. Sasuke was lying somewhat in the middle of the bed, with Himawari draped over his stomach and Boruto curled up against his side. Sasuke woke up when Naruto entered the room, but the kids slept on.

Naruto had to smile despite being so tired he could have slept on the floor. Which it looked liked he’d have to do.

“What happened here?”

He was especially curious about how Boruto ended up there.

“Himawari had a nightmare,” Sasuke said. “Boruto… I’m actually not sure.”

Naruto took off his shoes and his jacket, and managed to squeeze into the small space between Sasuke and the edge of the bed. He was too tired to try and find a better solution.

In the morning, Boruto denied everything. Sarada made fun of him.

“You had a nightmare, didn’t you?”

“I did not!”

“You did!”

Sarada cackled as Boruto chased her around the house, telling her to shut up, but since they both were proficient ninja and had long since mastered the skill of climbing walls with the soles of their feet, their chase soon became dangerous. For the furniture, though, not for them.

“Get down from there!” Naruto yelled when they almost broke the ceiling lamp in the living room.

They dropped to the ground and landed on the couch, where they proceeded to continue their fight.

“All right, that’s enough!” Naruto used his most demanding angry-dad-voice, but it wasn’t even half as efficient as Sasuke’s. “Go outside if you’re gonna fight!”

The kids did, almost breaking a window in the process.

Naruto sighed.

“Dad…?”

Naruto turned around to where Himawari stood in her far too big pajama pants and her favorite plushie under her arm.

“What is it, sweetie?”

“Yesterday… a boy in my class said it’s weird that you and Sasuke sleep together.”

“What?!” Naruto cried, then he tuned it down as he realized she meant that they slept in the same bed. “Why did you tell him that?” He said as calmly as he could.

“Was I not supposed to?”

Naruto realized that the decision of not telling her what was going on between him and Sasuke was coming back to bite them in the ass.

“No, it’s all right. It’s just… Not all people might understand the arrangement Sasuke and I have.”

Himawari’s eyes were round and curious. “Why not?”

“Um… Because…” Naruto knelt on the floor. “Because many people are very small minded. So what you think is normal, they don’t understand.”

“Oh… But I didn’t like it. He made fun of you.”

“It’s okay,” he said and petted her cheek. “Don’t mind him. Just… Just be careful what you tell people. Especially about Sasuke and I, okay? There’s something that we haven’t told you… but I realize that it’s important that you know about it.”

He wished Sasuke was there right then, but he’d gone out to get some groceries.

“Um… We are dating. That's why we live together. And sleep in the same room.”

“… Like you and mom used to?”

“Yeah, almost. Except we aren’t married. Yet.”

“Will you be?”

“Ah… Maybe. But until we tell you, do you think you can keep quiet about that?”

She nodded.

“That means no telling anyone at school that we sleep in the same bed, right?”

She nodded again.

“And not telling anyone that we kiss or touch or do any of those things, right.”

Another nod.

Naruto wasn’t even sure she would remember it the next day, but there wasn’t much else he could do. He petted her head.

“You’re a good girl, sweetie. I wish I didn’t need to tell you to keep quiet about this. I hope that soon you won’t need to.”  


\-----

 

He and Sasuke both knew that people had started talking. He’d heard it first from Shikamaru. He’d discreetly tried to ask about Naruto’s arrangement with Sasuke because, as he’d said, he’d heard talk and he wanted to know if there was anything to the rumors.

Naruto had just denied it and told Shikamaru that he and Sasuke were just good friends. He could tell that Shikamaru didn’t buy it. He was too smart for that. But he nodded nevertheless and pretended to accept Naruto’s explanation.

Soon, though, Naruto noticed that even his friends were treating him a bit differently. They gave him looks when they thought he didn’t see it, and they suddenly stopped talking when he came into a room. Finally, Kiba manned up to speak to him.

“Hey, Naruto,” he said one evening when they were out taking a drink together at a small pub. Naruto had been sitting by the bar, waiting for his drink. The others - Shikamaru, Sai, Chouji and Shino - were sitting by a table nearby.

Kiba sat down next to Naruto. 

“I was wondering… and the others are wondering too… What’s up with you and Sasuke?”

Naruto could feel his walls come up with astounding speed.

“What do you mean?” He could hear the slight chill in his own voice, although he tried to keep relaxed.

Kiba noticed it too. He proceeded with caution.

“I just mean… You never talk about your arrangement with him. We start wondering, you know? We’re your friends. You don’t have to keep secrets from us.”

Naruto felt some of his alertness seep away.

“You’re right… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to keep anything from you, but…”

Naruto guessed he could blame the many drinks he’d had for what he said next. If he’d been sober he might have thought his words through better, or at least spoke to Sasuke first, but the truth was that the secret had been weighting him down for a long time and suddenly he was telling everything to Kiba. He kept out the part with the cheating, but basically everything else just came flooding out.

At the end of it, Kiba just sat gaping.

“Naruto…” He looked around the bar, eyeing the bartender suspiciously. “I think we need to get you home.”

He waved over Shikamaru.

“But I’m fine,” Naruto protested.

He tried to stand, but the world started spinning the second he did. Kiba grabbed hold of him. It must have been the last few drinks that he’d had while he spoke to Kiba that finally got to him. He barely remembered the walk back home, except that he might have bumped his head at some point because it was throbbing like hell in the morning.

Sasuke sat on the edge of the bed when Naruto woke up.

“Ugh…” Naruto moaned. “Wat time issit?”

“It’s the middle of the day.”

Naruto groaned again. Sasuke offered him painkillers, which he gratefully accepted.

“What happened yesterday?” he asked. His voice was thick and rusty. He tried to clear his throat.

“Shikamaru and Kiba came here with you. You were so drunk you couldn’t walk.”

Naruto groaned again. He was glad the kids weren’t home. And that he wasn’t supposed to come in to the office today.

“Naruto…” Sasuke said slowly. “Why did you tell them about us?”

Naruto felt a cold shiver run down his spine. He suddenly remembered with clarity how he’d told Kiba the whole story about him and Sasuke.

“Shit…” he whispered.

“Kiba wanted to talk to me yesterday. He told me what you had said.”

Naruto swallowed.

“And…? Did he seem angry? Repulsed?”

He felt worry gnaw at his insides. 

“Why did you tell him?” Sasuke persisted.

“I don’t know… I didn’t mean to… It just happened.”

Sasuke sighed.

“I’d have liked to get a warning before someone I hardly talk to corner me with that kind of information about me.”

“I’m sorry,” Naruto groaned. “I couldn’t stop it. What did he say?”

“He wanted to verify it.”

“And what did you do?”

Naruto suddenly got a bad premonition.

“I told him to fuck off.”

“Ugh, I knew it.”

“What did you expect? That I’d just let him boss me around in my own house?”

“I guess not. But how did he seem…?”

Sasuke shrugged. “I don’t know… Mostly shook.”

Naruto nodded, although it made his headache worse. “Okay. Good. Then I might still have friends.”

He grabbed Sasuke’s arm and pulled him down on the bed.

“Lie here with me?” He pleaded.

Sasuke curled up next to him, his hand on Naruto’s stomach.

“Why did you tell Kiba without talking to me first?” Sasuke asked lowly. “I thought we agreed to keep it secret.”

“We did, and I shouldn’t have done it, I know, but… at the moment it just felt like the right thing to do. I guess I just needed someone to confide in… it can get lonely to carry this around alone, just you and me.”

Sasuke nodded against his shoulder. “I know.”

“Hey, dad…” Boruto suddenly showed up in the doorway.

He hesitated when he saw them lying there together, as though he feared he'd disrupted a moment. 

“Hey kiddo, what’re you doing here?” Naruto asked.

“I was bored to death at home. Himawari just plays with her dolls and mom knits. Can I stay here for dinner?”

Naruto grinned. “Sure.”

Naruto ended up accepting Boruto’s challenge to beat him at his video games, and lost spectacularly. Even Sasuke seemed to be enjoying himself, although he denied that he had been smiling fondly at their antics.

 

\-----

 

Sasuke was summoned to Naruto’s office and showed up there not without a little worry. He wasn’t usually summoned without already knowing what was going on.

“Homura Mitokado has fallen ill and it is believed that he won’t make it,” Naruto said. “I need more than one person on my council and Koharu knows this. She has decided to step down from her position because of old age. In other words, I need to assemble a new council.”

Sasuke stood quietly in front of the Hokage’s desk. He wasn’t entirely sure where Naruto was going with this, but he could make a guess.

“Sasuke… I think you know that you’re the obvious choice for a position at my council… If you’re willing to forfeit your position as my hokage in the shadows?”

He gave Sasuke a secret little smile.

“I don’t think a hokage in the shadows is needed anymore,” Sasuke said. “But do you really think it’s a good decision…”

Naruto lifted one hand. “It’s not your job to question my decisions. I know what I’m doing. I want strong, reliable people on my council. People that I know well and trust with my own life.” He hesitated. “That’s why… I’ve decided to ask Sakura if she wants the other position.”

This surprised Sasuke, despite the fact that it shouldn’t. She was the obvious choice as one of the strongest ninja in Konoha and their invaluable teammate. But… There was the issue with their personal problems. Sasuke kept quiet, though. It didn’t seem like Naruto wanted his opinion on this. He seemed to have already decided on it.

“I know… with the history between the three of us… It’s a risky choice. But if she says yes, I know we can all behave as adults and sacrifice our personal feelings for the job. Right?”

“Of course.”

Sasuke didn’t have a problem with working with Sakura. What he was worried about was whether she would take well to working with them…

 

\-----

 

Naruto hadn’t spoken to Sakura since the fateful day when she walked in on him and Sasuke. It wasn’t for lack of trying. Not on his side, anyway. But every time they met, whether it was accidentally in the street or at a gathering with their friends, she turned away from him and refused to acknowledge him. Their other friends had noticed the tension between them but no matter how many times they asked, neither Naruto nor Sakura said a word about what was going on. Naruto was grateful that she at least showed him and Sasuke that much respect. She could have easily outed them if she wanted to. But she didn’t.

This lead him to believe that she still cared for them somewhere deep down. And that was why when he called Sakura to his office, he felt a little less nervous than he would otherwise. He stood when she came into the room.

“Hi,” he said.

She just stared coldly at him. “What can I do for you, hokage-sama?”

Okay, so they were on that level… Naruto cleared his throat. He explained to her the situation the same way he had explained it to Sasuke. She listened in silence. After Naruto was done talking the silence just stretched out. Naruto realized he was fidgeting nervously and stopped it.

“I accept,” Sakura said finally.

Naruto was a little surprised. “You do?” He grinned. “That’s great! Sakura, I… I’m so glad, I…”

“If that was all, hokage-sama, I have duties to attend to.”

“Of course, sure…”

She turned her back on him and strode out without as much as a good bye.

But despite her cold behavior, Naruto still felt a soaring lightness. At least she had accepted. He knew that Sakura wouldn’t accept the position just for the sake of rising in the grades. She must have said yes because she genuinely wanted to. It wasn’t much, perhaps, but it was a step forward.

 

\-----

 

Sakura, Sasuke and Naruto working together had the potential to become disastrous, but when they were at work they were all completely professional. Sakura maybe a little too much. She spoke with her business tone and she never laughed at any of Naruto’s jokes. Naruto forgot himself and placed his hand around Sasuke’s waist once. Sakura looked like she’d gotten a cold shower, but she recovered fast and went back to talking business.

In the beginning, Naruto’s choices for the new council didn’t sit well with people, but there was nothing anyone could do and everyone with a high position vouched for Sasuke. They all knew how dedicated he had been with working for Konoha for the last fifteen years in order to make up for his past mistakes, and none of the ninja doubted him anymore. The ordinary citizens were a different issue, but they trusted their hokage enough to accept his choice.

In the end, the three of them worked perfectly as a team, even with their turbulent backstory. Sakura even forgot herself some times if she got eager about something and talked to them like she’d used, with enthusiasm and humor. But then she remembered again and it was like she shut down and put on the usual unflinching, cold mask.

Still, it made Naruto more and more certain that they’d be fine, eventually.

 

\-----

 

It so happened that their secret became more and more difficult to hide. They wanted to show to the world that they were together, but that was maybe a little too soon yet, especially right after Sasuke had been chosen to sit on the council. But they were considering telling Naruto’s friends, especially since Kiba kept begging him to do it.

“I can’t keep this secret all by myself,” he told Naruto. “I’m gonna fuck up and accidentally tell someone and then you’ll hate me. So please, tell them first. They deserve to know it. And I know that they’ll stand behind you. You’ve got nothing to worry about.”

Naruto considered it. He had wanted to tell the rest of his friends. He talked it over with Sasuke, and he agreed. He too wanted to start letting people know and they needed to start somewhere.

So that’s how they ended up inviting to a gathering with the intention of telling all of their friends… at the same time. Naruto was almost shaky with nervousness as the big day neared. Sasuke didn’t seem nervous, at least not on the outside, but he wasn’t gonna be the one to do the talking anyway. These were mostly Naruto’s friends, Sasuke hardly spoke to them although there was no animosity between him and them anymore. But he had agreed to being there as support.

It was one of the few times that Sasuke came to a gathering with Naruto’s friends. He seemed a bit overwhelmed about seeing them all and at the same time. They all came over to him to greet him and especially eager were the girls. Even though most of them were married and had their own families they seemingly never grew out of their obsession with him.

Well, that would perhaps stop soon when Naruto had gotten to say what he had to say. After the dinner, when everyone were full and had started on the drinks and the atmosphere was easy and relaxed, Naruto stood and called everyone to attention.

“So… uh… I have an announcement to make.”

He glanced over at Kiba, who showed him the thumbs up.

Naruto swallowed his nervousness and wished he had remained sitting so he could hold Sasuke’s hand.

“I… well, this might sound weird, but…” He was sweating bullets. He wished he had prepared better for this. “I know you’ve all been wondering what’s going on in my life. I know I’ve been very secretive but it’s for a reason. You know how the situation is with me and Sasuke living together, and… I’ve gotten a lot of questions about it. I don’t know what you’ve been thinking but your assumptions might just be true.”

Everyone was staring intently at him, some of them exchanging looks varying from confusion to rising trepidation.

Naruto felt his words get stuck in his throat. He just stood there, choking on words that refused to come forth, feeling the weight of everyone’s eyes on him… He could almost feel the tension that buzzed in the air, could feel the way they started to look at him differently, the way some of them frowned like they couldn’t believe that he was… that he was…

Sasuke rose to his feet and placed his hand on Naruto’s shoulder. It made Naruto feel more grounded. He gave Sasuke a grateful look.

“I… We’re…” He hesitated.

“They’re dating, for fucks sake.” Kiba had stood from his seat. “I can’t take this anymore. Sorry, it needed to be said. They’re dating, okay? Him and Sasuke. They’ve been together for-“

“Thank you,” Naruto snapped sharply. Then he added a little more calmly and with more feeling, because he really appreciated that Kiba had ended their suffering, “Thank you.”

If Kiba told everyone that they’d been dating for a year, there would be a little too many sharp brains around to do the math and realize that they got together immediately after they divorced their wives. They all knew how badly Hinata and Sakura had taken it and some of them had been more than a little angry with them. Although that was in the past now and they’d been forgiven a long time ago, if it was brought to attention again right now it might give their coming out a very bitter aftertaste. 

The silence stretched out over the room like a gigantic, dense cloud. Every single one of the people in front of them were speechless. When they finally started talking, they did it at them same time. The silence was shattered by a loud buzz of voices, most of them directed at Naruto and Sasuke, questions and confusion interspersed with congratulations and hugs.

Ino kept hugging Naruto again and again.

“Oh my god, I never knew,” she kept saying. “You should have told me! I would have supported you no matter what.”

Naruto was grateful she apparently didn’t put together two and two and wondered if he was part of the reason why Sasuke and Sakura broke up.

Chouji came and gave Naruto a big bear hug.

“I can’t believe it,” he said, shaking his head. “It seems surreal… You and Sasuke…” he shook his head again. “But I’m happy for you, no matter what.”

Lee was beside himself and kept sputtering about the springtime of youth and love, and gave Naruto a hug that was so strong Naruto was sure he felt his ribs crack.

Everyone kept milling around them till the owner of the restaurant came over and had to ask them to calm down and not disturb the other guests. After that things calmed a little, and soon enough they were back to the normal conversation.

Sasuke grabbed Naruto’s hand under the table. His fingers were shaking a little. That was when Naruto realized that Sasuke had been as nervous as him. He squeezed his hand and smiled at him. Finally, things were starting to go their way.

 

\-----

 

Sakura couldn’t believe that Ino had asked her if she knew that Sasuke was dating Naruto. Of course she knew! The man had ruined her marriage! It was incredible that even Ino could be that daft. No one else of her friends seemed to have pieced together that puzzle either. At least they weren’t telling her about it. Only Sai had seemed to get the implications.

“Tell me honestly,” he’d said one day not long after Sasuke and Naruto had come out. “Was it Naruto that came between you and Sasuke?”

Sakura realized she was tired. So, so tired. Tired of being angry. Tired of being weak.

She nodded. “Yes.”

But then she realized that wasn’t entirely true.

“Partly…” she added weakly. She sighed. “I think we were already falling apart. I mean… He was never at home…” She shook her head. “I wonder if we were even together from the beginning.”

Sai patted her shoulder. “I’m sorry it had to become this way. You seemed like a great team.”

Sakura snorted. “Were we? Really?” She shook her head. “I just remember Naruto being a brat and jumping into all fights without thinking, me standing useless at the side, and Sasuke… he was either doing all the work, getting saved by Naruto, or, for the most part, not being there at all…”

She trailed of. She realized she’d been foolish. Sasuke had never fully been there with them. When they were younger and he still was in the village, he’d just been focused on revenge. When he came back, he was only focused on redeeming himself. It was only now that he seemed to settle. Sakura wondered if she could ever have made him feel like that, like he wanted to stay, or if that was all Naruto’s doing…

“Maybe we can redeem that now, though,” she said softly.

She had been surprised and a little touched that Naruto had wanted her on the council. She’d though he wouldn’t trust her. But his happiness when she had said yes… She realized she missed him. She missed them: team 7. Maybe they weren’t perfect… Maybe they hardly worked at all… But there must be a reason why they always gravitated towards each other, no matter how the situation was.

“Maybe we weren’t that bad after all.”

 

\-----

 

“So, when’s the marriage?”

Naruto sighed. “Can people stop asking me that, please?”

Kiba shrugged. He and Naruto, and sometimes Shikamaru, had gotten a habit of going out for a drink or two every Friday afternoon.

“Why don’t you ask Sasuke to come with us one of these days?”

Naruto shrugged. “Why not. He should probably get out more.”

Naruto felt lighter at heart than he’d done for a long time when he went home that evening. Finally the big secret was off his chest, and everyone had taken it well. He couldn’t ask for more. Now the only issue was the reception from the rest of the village when they found out about the relationship between him and Sasuke, but honestly, that could wait. The longer they managed to keep the secret, the better. When Sasuke eventually got a more secure position in the society and on the council, maybe then they could start thinking about making their relationship completely official. Until then, Naruto was satisfied with what they had.

Sasuke was reading a book when Naruto came home. He had been the one to take care of most of the work on their house, so naturally he had made sure there was a room with enough space for all of his scrolls and books. He liked to sit by the huge bay window in the warm light from a floor lamp among the bookshelves and read.

Naruto leaned down and kissed the side of his head.

“How was Kiba?” Sasuke asked without looking up from his book.

Naruto sat down on the armrest of his chair.

“He’s fine. He’s getting married next spring!”

“Congratulate him from me.”

“If you came with us the next time, you could do it yourself.”

Sasuke looked up from the book just to frown at Naruto.

“It was Kiba who asked,” Naruto added.

For some reason, Sasuke was still skeptical about Naruto’s friends. It seemed like he expected them to turn their back on him any moment.

“Please, Sasuke. They really want to see you more often. They ask about you all the time, even more now than before.”

Sasuke put his book down.

“Okay,” he said.

Naruto nearly fell from his perch on the chair. “Really?”

Sasuke shrugged. “Why not. I guess I could benefit from talking to someone else than a bunch of children.”

“Exactly! Hey… Are you lumping me in with the children?”

Sasuke smirked. “I can’t imagine why you’d think so.”

Naruto slipped closer to Sasuke.

“Sasuke?”

“Mm?”

“I wondered…” Naruto bit his lip.

He caressed Sasuke’s hand, ran his fingers over his knuckles. Sasuke gave him a curious look.

“What is it?”

Naruto shook his head. He shot Sasuke a smile. “Nothing.”

He kissed Sasuke’s forehead and stood. He stretched and yawned. “I think it’s time to go to bed. Are you coming?”

“Yeah, just a moment. I want to finish the last chapter.”

Naruto stood there and observed Sasuke for a moment longer, smiling fondly. Sasuke looked up at him.

“You’re acting strange,” he said.

“Me?” Naruto chuckled. “I was just, uh… thinking.”

“As I said: strange.”

“Bastard,” Naruto muttered under his breath.

Sasuke just chuckled.

 

\-----

 

Sasuke had started taking Sarada with him when he left Konoha. He did so sometimes even now that he was on the council. For most of them time, in peace times like these, there weren’t a lot of serious cases to take care of that needed the councils input, so sometimes Sasuke left his duties to Shikamaru and escaped.

Naruto knew he needed to get away sometimes. Sakura seemed to have gotten more understanding for that side of him too. She even allowed him to take with him Sarada, so it was apparent that she had changed her view on a few things.

She spoke to Naruto even when she didn’t need to nowadays. Naruto wondered if she sometimes forgot to be angry because at times it almost felt like the old days between them… The old days while Sasuke was away, that was… Not the old, old days when Sakura got annoyed if he spoke even one word to her.

Come to think of it… Naruto wondered how he could have neglected to see the feelings he had for Sasuke when he came back to the village after training with Jiriaya for three years, and instead of making use of the opportunity to get closer to Sakura (whom he’d allegedly been in love with) he’d just been focused on finding Sasuke… his rival… who would surely take his dream girl away from him.

He was astounded at his own stupidity.

He wanted to share that thought with Sakura, but then he realized she might not want to listen to him talk about how much he loved Sasuke. She still got tense it there was less than three inches between him and Sasuke while they were in her vicinity.

He thought about the meeting with his friends tonight. Sasuke had promised he’d come too, and Naruto was looking forward to it.

 

\-----

 

It was many hours later that he was sitting in a bar, between Kiba and Shino, on his third beer and still keeping half an eye on the door to the bar. It had been an hour and a half since Sasuke should have shown up. It looked like he wouldn’t be coming. Naruto felt more disappointed than he was prepared for.

His hand went to the pocked of his jacket, like it had done many times that night. His fingers ran over the rounded corner of the small object he had there.

“I think I’ll be going home,” he told Kiba. 

“Why? Hey, there’s Sasuke!”

Naruto’s head shot up. There he was, by the door to the bar, looking around for them. Naruto stood and waved both arms.

“Sasukeeee! We’re here!”

Sasuke looked like he wanted to leave again.

Naruto hurried over to him and hugged him.

“You’re late!” He meant to sound accusing, but instead it came out as a whine.

“Sorry, I was held up. Himawari refused to leave with her mother.”

“Oh, shit…” Naruto bit his lip. “How did Hinata take it?”

Hinata had started to come over and pick up the kids herself lately, instead of sending her parents. Usually, Naruto was home when she came since she made sure to come in the evening. That way she didn’t have to speak to Sasuke. She already disliked the thought of him raising her children (she still didn't trust him entirely). Naruto had been hoping that maybe the two of them could get on better terms after a while. He could see that Hinata was trying very hard to trust Sasuke a little, but things like this didn’t exactly help.

“I think it made her a little pleased,” Sasuke said.

Naruto frowned. “Really?”

“Yeah… It seems like she worries that I’m not suitable to take care of Himawari, but when she so obviously wants to stay with me… I think it calmed her a bit. She even smiled at me.”

“Damn… I didn’t see that coming.”

Naruto hugged Sasuke again, just because he could.

“People are staring,” Sasuke murmured.

“I don’t care,” Naruto pouted, but he let go of Sasuke and dragged him over to his friend’s table.

Sasuke was greeted heartily. Alcohol had been flowing for a while and everyone were in a good mood. After Sasuke had been drinking a bit, he too smiled more easily, and he actually had a longer conversation with Shino. Which was surprising since they both normally hardly spoke on their own…

By the time they went home, it was long past midnight and they were both in a very good mood.

“I think you had a good time,” Naruto said.

Sasuke shrugged. “It was alright.”

Naruto came closer and poked his cheek. “If it was just ‘alright’, why are you smiling like that?”

Sasuke batted his hand away. “Okay. I had fun. Satisfied?”

Naruto threw one arm around Sasuke with a huge grin. “Very.”

They walked close together down the street until Sasuke suddenly took a few steps away from Naruto.

“You have to stop touching me,” he said. “I think that old woman who passed us almost had a stroke when you put your arm around me.”

“I put it around your shoulders. Buddies do that.”

“Most ‘buddies’ don’t caress their friends cheek at the same time.”

“Bah, she couldn’t have seen that,” Naruto said, but he kept the distance till they came home.

The second they were inside the door, though, he was all over Sasuke.

When Sasuke finally came up for air after a very intense kiss, he grabbed Naruto’s wandering hands and pushed him a little away from himself.

“Sarada’s home,” he said.

Naruto backed off a little. “Why?”

“Sakura works late tonight and Sarada wanted to stay here.”

Naruto sighed. “I’m very happy that the kids like to stay here, but I had hoped we could be alone tonight.”

He came closer to Sasuke, trapping him against the wall.

“We haven’t had sex for two weeks,” he murmured.

“How do you know… have you been counting days?”

“Every minute of them.”

Naruto pressed closer till their groins were touching.

“What are you doing?” Sasuke said softly. “We can’t…”

Naruto tried to give him his best pleading look.

“No,” Sasuke hissed. He shoved Naruto away, although he seemed reluctant. “No.”

Naruto groaned. “Just one more kiss. She’s probably asleep anyway.”

“Dad?” There was the sound of feet on the stairs. “Naruto? Is that you guys?”

“Yes,” Sasuke said and shoved Naruto away with a last warning glance. “We’re home.”

Sarada came down the stairs in her pajama pants and an oversized t-shirt.

“Shouldn’t you be asleep?” Sasuke said strictly.

“How can anyone sleep in this ruckus? I thought someone was breaking in.”

She looked suspiciously from Naruto’s flushed face to Sasuke’s mushed up hair, but didn’t comment on it.

“Do you want something to eat?” Naruto asked.

Sasuke looked shot him a dark look.

“What?” Naruto shrugged. “I’m hungry and I want to eat something, and she’s awake, so…”

“I’d love to,” Sarada said, eyes sparkling. Her mother probably never let her stay up this late.

Sasuke sighed. “Fine.”

Naruto made instant ramen and they ate in the living room in the light of some candles. Sarada and Naruto did most of the talking, while Sasuke just stirred his food and watched them.

He intoned with a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ or just a simple grunt if the two others addressed him, but Naruto could see that he was having a good time.

Finally, Sarada went to bed, and they sat in comfortable silence for a while.

Naruto started fidgeting. His hand strayed to his pocket again.

“I’ve been thinking,” he said.

“Oh no.” Sasuke gave him a teasing smile. “What’s next? Pigs fly?”

Naruto shoved his shoulder. “Shut up, I’m trying to be serious here. I’ve been thinking a lot about something lately, and…”

He stood from the pillow and turned towards Sasuke. He held out his hand. Sasuke took it hesitantly.

“What are you up to now?”

Naruto just pulled him to his feet. He held on to his hand.

“You know…” He ran his fingers over Sasuke’s. His heart was slamming in his chest. “I… uh… I wondered if…”

Sasuke must have sensed that something important was about to happen because he didn’t make fun of Naruto’s flustering. He said nothing, just waited for Naruto to continue.

Naruto felt like his heart was going to explode through his chest as he got to one knee in front of Sasuke. One side of him was screaming incoherently, incredulous at what he was doing. The other was speechless. He looked up at Sasuke, who just stood there completely stunned.

Naruto got the small, black box that he’d been carrying for over a week out of his pocket, and opened it. All the words he’d carefully thought out before he got to his knees were suddenly gone. This was the first time he had actually prepared a speech before he spoke, and now he couldn’t remember anything of it. But the four words he remembered were the only ones that mattered.

“Will you marry me?”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The late autumn wind had a slight chill to it, but the sky was blue and cloudless and brought with it a memory of the summer. The wind rustled through the branches of an apple tree, and a leaf floated down and landed in Sasuke’s hair.

Naruto reached up and plucked it out.

He had never seen Sasuke as close to having a blushing smile as he did today. He was wearing a black haori over a white kimono and hakama. Naruto was his opposite with a white haori over a black kimono and a dark grey hakama. They were standing on a field, underneath the branches of two apple trees. Around them were their kids, all dressed up in their finest wear and grinning just as brightly as their fathers, and the three other members of the former team taka. No one else was there except the priest.

Karin carried forth the rings. She had tears of happiness in her eyes. She had been surprisingly okay with the fact that Sasuke had bypassed her for someone else once again.

“I had a feeling about this,” was the only thing she'd said when they had told her about their relationship.

Now she looked genuinely happy for them.

Suigetsu was the only one of Sasuke’s friends who had been visibly shocked by their announcement. But he recovered fast and didn’t treat them any differently. Juugo looked proud as a father where he stood covered in little birds and watched the ceremony come to its conclusion.

Sasuke and Naruto had agreed on two things: to keep the ceremony simple with as few guests as possible, and to get married outside of Konoha.

They ate dinner together with their kids and Sasuke’s friends in the lodge that they’d rented for the occasion. After the dinner, Karin, Suigetsu and Juugo took the kids with them to a hotel nearby and left Sasuke and Naruto to spend the night together alone.

“Are you happy?” Naruto whispered as they were lying next to each other in bed that night.

A small but warm smile flitted over Sasuke’s lips. “Yes,” he said softly. “I can honestly say that I am.”

Naruto leant down and kissed his shoulder. “Me too,” he whispered.

He snuggled close to Sasuke and settled with his cheek on his husbands – _his husband_ … it still felt unreal to think about it – chest and gazed out the floor-to-ceiling window. It had a beautiful view out towards a lake in the distance.

For the first time in many, many years he finally felt like he could lower his shoulders and relax. It was completely quiet around them, no noise from children or the constant buzz from the city. No stressing job hanging over him for the next few days.

He could finally breathe.

“Hey… husband…” Naruto murmured, about to nod off.

“Yes?”

“… I just wanted to say it out loud.”

Sasuke chuckled. “Sleep now.”

“Mmm… Sasuke?”

“Mhm?”

“I love you.”

Sasuke wrapped his arm around Naruto’s shoulders and held him close. He spoke so quietly that Naruto wouldn’t have heard him if his mouth hadn’t been right next to his ear, but the four simple words were deep-felt.

“I love you too.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This literally became a summary to wrap the story up. I wanted to write more about their relationship with the kids, but there was so much else to write about so it sort of wasn't room for it... I figured this was better than nothing, though. I hope you enjoyed this last chapter, and thank you so much for following this story. I cherish every single comment and kudos, they're the fuel for my writing ^^
> 
> Oh, and I just wanted to say that I'll keep writing for this fandom. I still have many ideas, but I have mostly one shots planned for now. I tend to loose interest for my multichaps after they reach a certain length, so I thought I'd try something new. Also, I'll be more active on tumblr and I might post some drabbles and one shots there that won't be posted here, so I recommend you follow me on caninekitten.tumblr.com too ^^


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